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Feeling a bit ???: Tell me what you think.

(30 Posts)
Peasblossom Tue 09-Mar-21 13:41:01

A few weeks ago a friend became a grandmother for the first time. She’s besotted and forwards all the photos, videos etc.
It’s Ok, though I am a bit running out of things to say in reply and I confess to a sigh when the phone bongs again. She gets upset if I don’t respond and will text again or has even phoned to see if I’ve got the latest.

But now I have on my phone a mounted studio type photograph. Very nice.

Apparently I can purchase this for £25.?

.I think I should have put this in AIBU.

lemongrove Tue 09-Mar-21 13:47:36

?
Your friend is just overdoing the ‘Grandma for the first time’ thing, it will settle down eventually.Don’t answer the phone for a while if you think it’s her, a text is easier to either ignore or respond to.
Just say ‘very nice’ in response to a photo.

Casdon Tue 09-Mar-21 14:18:50

Enough is enough after the first week or so. Are you a gran yourself? If so I’d ‘love bomb’ her back, send a picture of one of your grandchildren each time she sends you one. If not, how about pictures of your dog, cat, budgie etc.

tanith Tue 09-Mar-21 14:19:37

Yes I agree don’t respond so often she might take the hint.

Peasblossom Tue 09-Mar-21 14:21:43

No, I’m not a gran. I could send her OH bird watching pictures.

I’m equally fed up with those ?

Oopsadaisy1 Tue 09-Mar-21 14:23:32

Make an excuse
No I haven’t seen it, my phone battery is dead
No I haven’t seen it p, my phone is in another room
No I haven’t seen it , I’m busy
No I haven’t seen it, I’m busy sorting out all of my photos of my family, (dog,garden, postman, funny thing I saw yesterday) to send to you.

Obviously, don’t answer your land line the first time she calls either. She would be very thick skinned not to get the hint.

timetogo2016 Tue 09-Mar-21 14:26:01

Oopsadaisy1 is spot on,she can`t argue with that.

Witzend Tue 09-Mar-21 14:27:03

Have you got Gdcs of your own?
In that case I’d say, Yes, it’s lovely, but TBH I’ve got so many photos of my own, I just don’t have space for any more. (Which in my case would be nothing but the truth.).

She must be a bit soft in the head, though - who on earth ever wants photos of friends’ grandchildren? I mean, I do like to see pics that people email or WhatsApp, but to display them in a frame?

Tangerine Tue 09-Mar-21 14:31:23

Take longer and longer to reply to her messages and she'll get the hint.

I suspect she's just over excited at the moment and I hope and imagine she'll calm down.

I am interested to see the occasional photo of friends' grandchildren.

Peasblossom Tue 09-Mar-21 14:32:09

Thanks. Ive just ignored the phone with your encouragement, I knew she’d ring to see why I haven’t placed an order yet.?

Urmstongran Tue 09-Mar-21 14:42:35

Other people’s photos of holidays or grandchildren and details of what they dreamt about last night can become tiresome if overly shared. Less definitely is more.
?

I choose not to have a smartphone and take a dip whenever one particular friend reaches for her handbag saying ‘ooh just let show you these’ ....

FlexibleFriend Tue 09-Mar-21 14:46:23

This is a prime example of why I have so few friends.

geekesse Tue 09-Mar-21 14:50:12

Depends how close you are to her, I suppose. If you know her really well and can be totally honest with her, tell her she needs to calm down a bit - ask her if she’d really want to buy a photo of your grandchild for £25, get her to laugh at herself, and pass it off as a bit of silliness.

If you can’t do that, just make what are obviously bland comments: ‘very nice dear’, ‘aren’t photos expensive these days?’ or ‘my, you are enjoying being a granny!’ Show little interest and she’ll eventually get the message.

Amberone Tue 09-Mar-21 14:54:54

She's probably feeling sorry for you because you don't have any so she wants to share. I had this off all my friends who married and had children before me, along with the constant 'Don't you like kids?' 'You don't know what you are missing!' There was no email then, but snail mail was constantly full of the doings of them all and phone calls put me to sleep. Then of course they all had grandchildren before me, too.

If they had tried to sell me studio portraits of their progeny not quite sure what I would have said.

I think I would just stop answering the phone so often, and continue with the gasps of amazement and delight now and again. If you could have a snippet of news for her that would be handy - when it all gets too much just interrupt with "Oh I know what I meant to tell you..." followed by ''got to go and sort the food delivery/milkman/neighbour, talk to you soon". Hopefully she will calm down before too long.

Does she have anyone else to share with?? Or is it just you??

Redhead56 Tue 09-Mar-21 14:54:54

I would simply text nice photo but if you don't mind I have a million things to do. I don't sit around all day looking at my phone. I have said this many times to people who constantly text jokes that I am not remotely interested in.

Grannybags Tue 09-Mar-21 15:35:35

FlexibleFriend

This is a prime example of why I have so few friends.

Me too!

Blossoming Tue 09-Mar-21 15:36:04

I’ve never heard anything so ridiculous!

Calendargirl Tue 09-Mar-21 15:46:29

Besotted new grans need to remember that this beautiful, amazing, unique little person is, to everyone else, just another baby.

?

Peasblossom Tue 09-Mar-21 16:16:36

I wish I could say I was busy, with a million things to do but I’m not. I’m at home 90% of the day.

Oh bing, bong. There it goes again. Truthfully.

As for sharing. Well, that’s just weird. Funnily enough that’s what my sister said when her grandkids were born, but I thought it was just a jokey hardback to our childhood.

Oh well, I’d better go and see what she’s sent.

Callistemon Tue 09-Mar-21 16:23:20

Is she asking for your opinion on whether the photo is worth the money or actually asking you if you want to buy one?

I don't mind a quick glance at photos - "oh, sweet"!

Here's one of my DGS for you, free, £30 if you want it framed

?

JaneJudge Tue 09-Mar-21 16:28:28

asking you to buy a framed photo of her grandchild is just ridiculous grin it's like me giving everyone a framed photo of my dog as a christmas present

JenniferEccles Tue 09-Mar-21 16:28:40

Ah but you wait *Peasblossom’
Before you know it, in a few years you will be inundated with stories about how said grandchild is SO clever, they are top of the class.

I’m afraid for some grandparents this starts at birth and never stops!

Much as we love our friends, if we are perfectly honest, are we REALLY interested in their grandchildren?

Maybe it’s just me though.
Maybe I’m just a miserable old so and so ?

Peasblossom Tue 09-Mar-21 16:30:39

Oh perhaps she just wants me to say how lovely it is. I may have got hold of the wrong end of the stick seeing the price there.

The latest text was just a little video without a comment.

Peasblossom Tue 09-Mar-21 16:36:11

Im moderately interested in other peoples grandchildren. Not so much babies. About 3 onwards they get quite interesting until they’re about 8? As long as the stories are real ones and not impossibly advanced.

I just feel a bit out of my depth here. Snowed under.

JaneJudge Tue 09-Mar-21 16:37:44

lockdown is most probably making it worse