Meal preparation

Greyduster picturing your husband wirh the ruler.

I could have written your post, shropshirelass except that my DH has long retired and he still rarely tries his hand at the chopping board, and when he does, he is so precise in following a recipe or cutting up the ingredients it takes half the day. If it says “cut into one inch dice” he has the ruler out! If I left it to him we would starve to death! I once saw a photo that said marriage is about two people asking each other “what do you want to eat” every day, and then they die!

My DH does not cook or prep food (apart from getting his own breakfast!). He does clear up my messy kitchen and load and unload the dishwasher though! He has said that he wants to start cooking when he retires! I do get a bit fed up of cooking and wouldn’t bother so much if it was just for me! DH does enjoy every meal, well almost anyway!

I agree about Gin not being thanked. I think he would have had that dog meat long ago from me. We always thank each other for food prepared. It's important to show appreciation to your partner.

hollysteers

As a young bride, I loved cooking and would lie in bed reading recipe books. After 45 years I went right off it (traditional older husband, looking for the meal on table every night...) He would say it was a pity I saw my meal as just fuel while he savoured it.
Now alone, I hardly bother and the cold collations I put together are quite healthy, interspersed with the odd ready meal etc.
My son loves cooking and really treats me when he is here. I think he finds it very creative. My daughter is completely uninterested in it so I do not think it is a gender issue at all these days, thank goodness.

That's an interesting post, hollysteers. Fortunately my 3 boys all cook, DS1 bakes bread - as a German living in the USA that became a necessity.

Neither my DH nor my father ever cooked, not to mention my Fil!

My father did appreciate my mother's good cooking, my DH does sometimes compliment me on the cooking, if only by just helping himself to seconds.

Having someone eat your efforts for years and years without comment like Gin has had to bear must be awful.

I’ve been the cook of the meals and really don’t mind. I think of it as my kitchen and DH knows to keep out of the way when I am “creating” a meal ?
He is happy to go to the supermarket or garden shop and frequently does, makes many drinks during the day and would make me toast if I wanted it - but he has never been interested in cooking.
It’s been that way for 43 years married and it’s fine with me. If I don’t feel like cooking a meal DH will say “well let’s have a takeaway”.
He takes on many jobs like decorating and grass cutting which I don’t do.
???☕️????

When I was married I was responsible for most of the meals and domestic issues - ex was very good at 'events' like a big BBQ but as with many men didn't really do the day to day stuff. It was the 'traditional' division of labour but I didn't mind as he worked much longer hours.

But I'm astounded to read here of so many of you who do it all, for 50 years, and the shopping and clearing whilst OHs don't lift a finger and even complain!

Just why is this tolerated?

Lollypop and Gin I don't understand why you do it if you don't want to.

As a young bride, I loved cooking and would lie in bed reading recipe books. After 45 years I went right off it (traditional older husband, looking for the meal on table every night...) He would say it was a pity I saw my meal as just fuel while he savoured it.
Now alone, I hardly bother and the cold collations I put together are quite healthy, interspersed with the odd ready meal etc.
My son loves cooking and really treats me when he is here. I think he finds it very creative. My daughter is completely uninterested in it so I do not think it is a gender issue at all these days, thank goodness.

Not only have I cooked every dinner for nearly sixty years but my DH just eats it without comment. Sometimes I feel like putting a plate of dog meat and biscuits in front of him and see if he notices! I used to love cooking when our large family were still at home as they appreciated it4 but now would happily live on uncooked food.

I do it all

I hate cooking and have done absolutely every single meal plan, cook and shop for 51 years. If I'm ever alone, I have toast and a cup of tea.

We take turns. I'm a better cook, but he enjoys cooking.

DH does the meal planning, prep and cooking, and even provides all hot beverages. He only discovered his inner chef when he retired, and it's been a game changer. I never enjoyed it, and he does.

He likes to try new recipes, and to ring the changes we started getting recipe boxes delivered a few months ago, with all the ingredients for two meals a week. I did have to jump in and correct him the other day when I overheard him telling his brother that we were having food parcels delivered now.

When we have people round (hollow laugh) I come into my own, as he doesn't like to cook for a crowd. I also do any baking, which I enjoy, and I'm the self-appointed queen of the soup maker.

When we married I agreed to do all the cooking, as long as I had Fridays off. So every Friday my DH goes and gets a takeaway. He would bring it in, dump it on the kitchen worktop and wait for me to serve it up. One night I moaned about that and the next night, after I'd cooked our meal, I left it in the kitchen and told him it was ready and all he had to do was plate it up. He was a bit more helpful after that (for a while anyway).
He wouldn't dream of cooking anything, although he did bring me a cup of tea and biscuits in bed on my birthday. For the last couple of years we have been on the 5:2 diet and have calorie counted microwave meals our fasting days, so I only cook 4 evening meals, plus breakfast and lunches.
On the other hand, he does all the DIY around the house and anything to do with the car. When he once suggested to me that I should learn how to check the oil, water and tyres on the car, I said I would if he learnt to cook. He never mentioned it again!

The thing that really gets me every day is wondering what to have for dinner!

My Husband does all our cooking bless him

I usually have a weekly round of a couple of takeaways, a Cook ready meal - plus a reheated 'something I cooked and froze earlier' meal. (My friend calls them UFO's.)

Therefore, If I have salad one day - I'm only really cooking twice a week - which suits me fine!

he often interrupts me to ask where some piece of equipment is or where is the oil etc.
My husband continually asks questions too Retired65. I mostly ignore him now and he knows to look for it. I have seen him standing beside the fridge and asking Have we any milk?
I'm amazed at how many women admit to doing most in the kitchen in spite of not wanting to.

LaGoulue my OH used to be a chef too, and I know what you mean by having to fight to get near the cooker. The down side is I’ve got fat and I don’t always want to eat what is cooked for me as it’s not what I fancy having. I’m just a spoilt princess ?

My OH spoils me rotten. He works 12 hours a day and then comes home and cooks a meal. Every night. He finds it relaxes him. He also does all the shopping. The only time I cook is when he doesn’t feel well, which is rare, and I do my chicken and pepper dish. He cooks at weekends too wonderful meals.

I do 99.9% of everything in the house and I get really annoyed by it - but if I don’t “it” never happens, drives me demented!

We share it. On days I work I arrive home to a cooked meal. Other days I usually cook. When he wants curry, I cook it, but I have make a pasta dish for me.

Should’ve read ‘I ‘spose’

I’m truly blest being married (45 years) to an Italian chef . In fact I have to “fight” to get near the cooker if I want to cook something myself. Could be worse, I ‘spoke....