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Disappointments that turned out for the best

(38 Posts)
Beswitched Thu 01-Apr-21 10:38:36

Just been consoling a colleague who didn't get a much wanted promotion with a story of how a similar thing happened to me years ago but a better opportunity came along that put me on a much better track both personally and career wise.
Just wondering if any of you have stories of something that didn't work out but led to better things?

Caro57 Fri 02-Apr-21 10:34:25

My first marriage 🤣😂

Shinamae Fri 02-Apr-21 10:36:43

My son is looking for a house, two have fallen through but I definitely believe things happen for a reason and he will find the perfect house eventually!!

CrumblyMumbly Fri 02-Apr-21 10:38:28

I had my heart set on a house, paid for all the surveys etc and sold my house. The vendor changed her mind at the last minute and pulled out. I had to move back into my Mum’s but drove around every night until I saw a for sale sign in an empty house which looked a bit run down but in a lovely area. I sneakily opened the side gate into this wonderful back garden and knew I had found ‘the one’! 25 years later I am still here with my lovely family and am so glad that the first house fell through! Big believer in things happening for a reason.

Sardinia2020 Fri 02-Apr-21 10:41:34

Exactly the same as your colleague, Bewitched. I can remember sobbing in my car when I didn’t get a particular job but it absolutely turned out for the best. Also when I went on maternity leave 35 years ago, the company wouldn’t let me return part time. At the time it seemed devastating but made me change career direction which was the best thing ever. I am always telling people that when one door closes another opens which is invariably better.

ElaineRI55 Fri 02-Apr-21 10:42:04

Similar story. Didn't get a promotion ( probably mainly because someone who had more experience in the exact job had just joined the organisation).
Had left previous organisation due to issues of conscience.
Having failed to get the promotion ( to better paid, full-time post), it wasn't clear whether I would have enough hours employment to pay the bills.
Was getting a bit worried as I was main breadwinner and DH health not great.
Saw another ( better paid) job I didn't think I'd get with a much larger organisation. Got the job and was there for 10 years before retiring.
My son also ended up getting work in the organisation where I'd failed to get the promotion which he possibly wouldn't have had I still been there, so he benefitted too.

Wendy Fri 02-Apr-21 10:43:20

My son had this problem. The first 2 houses fell through and then he found the perfect one just up the road, so keeping friends and schools was a positive with a better house in a better place.

cupcake1 Fri 02-Apr-21 10:46:10

I once went for a job in a the next town to where I lived. It was with the same ‘firm’ I was working for but a smaller office where I would be pretty much my own boss dealing with the public. At the interview one of the panel was a man who really disliked me and the feeling was mutual (another story!) I knew there and then I wouldn’t get it he used the excuse because I’d had a recent hysterectomy I’d probably have more time on sick leave and it might ‘happen again’??!! I went on with the same employer and was promoted twice to a much better paid managerial job with 17 staff to manage, more annual leave and no travel expenses. It turned out to be a far better outcome with the added bonus of fingers up to him😂!

Sadgrandma Fri 02-Apr-21 10:48:53

Couldn't agree more with Caro57. I was married for 17 years until he upped and left me for another woman. I had married very young so was still only in my mid thirties. We didn't have children. At first I was heartbroken and thought I would never be happy again but I met a lovely man and we bonded over the fact that his wife had left him too. It wasn't love at first sight but we gradually became closer and to my surprise I became pregnant (had always thought I couldn't have children). We have now been very happily married for 37 years and our wonderful daughter gave us a beautiful granddaughter three years ago. I rarely think of my first husband but when I do I realise that he gave me the best gift ever by leaving me.

tictacnana Fri 02-Apr-21 10:51:45

Having been told that I wouldn’t be able to have children, my second pregnancy made me feel extraordinarily blessed. 15 weeks into the pregnancy I had the news that the baby was very damaged and pressure was put upon me to terminate. When I refused, I was told that he wouldn’t live long after being born in any event. Anyway, she is 39 next week , has a BSc and is the mother of two beautiful children. Life is full of wonderful outcomes.

icanhandthemback Fri 02-Apr-21 10:53:00

When my first and second sons were born, I was really disappointed. The first one was the offspring of a violent and abusive man so I was so scared he'd turn out to be the same that I was wailing that I didn't want a boy. Within 5 minutes he was rushed to SCBU and I was desperate to have him back. He was there for 5 days and that fragility of life has meant we bonded well. He is the most lovely husband and father.
My second son was born after I lost my baby girl and nearly my life. I took a bit of a gamble that the condition I had with her wouldn't arise again, lost a twin on the way and he was eventually born. His father was smitten and I didn't have the heart to say I was disappointed after all we'd been through. He has been a brilliant son and I am so proud of him.
My disappointments have turned out to be a complete joy.

Sara1954 Fri 02-Apr-21 10:58:32

Yes I’m a big believer, that if something doesn’t work out, it wasn’t meant to be. Something my late father in law consoled me with on several occasions.
I once fell madly in love with a house, we viewed it, had a offer accepted, then our buyer pulled out. This went on for nearly a year, we became quite friendly with the vendors, we saw them so often. Eventually we had a very firm offer on a Friday evening, and on the Saturday, rang the agent as soon as they opened, only to hear that the vendor had accepted an offer the day before.
But, not wanting to lose our buyers, we set straight out to look for something else, and found a house which was in a lovely location, we did a lot of work, but it was eventually a beautiful house, we had fantastic neighbors, and spent ten very happy years there.

missingmarietta Fri 02-Apr-21 11:04:39

I was made redundant when my boss moved away from the small town I was in. I was a single parent to 2 teenage boys, with a mortgage.

I could not find a job to compare as regards pay, hours and conditions no matter how I tried. I decided to move to a town 6 miles away where property was cheaper, and to a smaller house.

In doing so I paid off the exiting mortgage so I bought the next house mortgage free. It was the best thing I ever did. I was also now living on the coast in what is now a very desirable area. I also went on to be able to semi retire in my 40's.

Bazza Fri 02-Apr-21 11:13:06

Most things really do happen for the best, even if you can’t see it at the time. My sister was a solicitor specialising in conveyancing, and she was a firm believer in how ever disappointed you may be when a house falls through, you will end up with the right one in the end. She was never wrong. It certainly happened to us. I love the house we ended up with and I’m so pleased that the house we thought was the one didn’t work out. Have faith!

Diggingdoris Fri 02-Apr-21 11:18:21

I went to view a house with my son and the owner said the couple before us had agreed to buy it, but we could come in as we'd made an appointment. It was perfect for him and he was gutted that we'd been pipped at the post. Three weeks later the owner rang to ask if we were still interested as the couple's mortgage offer had fallen through. Son and partner have lived there now for two years very happily . What's meant to be!

Sago Fri 02-Apr-21 11:18:34

On a company relocation we were under pressure to find a house fast.
We viewed a lovely old house that ticked all the boxes but I really didn’t feel happy.
We had an argument in a lay-by as OH really wanted it.
I put my foot down.
As we settled into the area we always pointed it out as the house that never was.
My eldest child as a student used to watch Most Haunted.
The house featured, apparently it was full of spirits😳

cc Fri 02-Apr-21 11:21:03

I think that this often happens with houses, somehow one is just "meant to be". We never had a chance to view one house because our own house didn't go under offer until after it was sold. Next year we sold and the original house came back on the market as the new owners were divorcing. We'd been sad to lose a different house in the meantime, but this was obviously the right one. We were happy there for around 15 years and only moved out last summer.

Witzend Fri 02-Apr-21 11:27:10

Re houses falling through, my mother would always say, ‘If it’s meant to be....’

We were very disappointed when the purchase of the bigger house we wanted, didn’t come off. We couldn’t sell ours quickly enough, and the apologetic vendors sold to someone else.
Dds were still pre teen or very early teen at the time, and although our house was nice, we could really have done with more space downstairs.

Roll on a few years, after dds started going out at night, and we were so glad we didn’t buy it! It was on a very quiet, unlit road, lined with masses of thick shrubs, etc., off another road that was also very quiet and ‘lurky’ IYKWIM. We’d never have felt remotely happy about them coming home alone at night - I’d have been having 40 fits every time - whereas our house is a short walk from a bus stop - and buses are very frequent - on a relatively busy, well lit road.

Roll on yet more years and it’s fine for me and dh, and we still have plenty of room for guests.

Flopsey Fri 02-Apr-21 11:35:17

Like Caro57 and Sadgrandma I too was dumped by my first husband for a woman who was ten years younger then me.
I was was so utterly devastated and humiliated that it took me eight years before I found ‘the right one,’ strangely he is eleven years younger then me.🤫
We’ve now been married for 35 years and every day I’m grateful that my first marriage ended.

LinAnn52 Fri 02-Apr-21 12:20:54

Twenty eight years ago we put a deposit on a new build house very close to where we were living, so no problem with school or job changes. Exciting as it meant going from a small, three bed terraced house to a lovely four bed detached. All measured up, carpets ordered and new curtains custom made. We also had a keen buyer for our house. Shortly before the move, the builder went into administration. The house was complete but lots of snagging needed done. We had to make the decision to walk away from it. However the same week, we found a four bed detached in an established estate ten minutes walk away, where we had always wanted to live. Purchase was completed almost immediately. We are still here and very happy. The new estate where we should have moved to does not look nearly as appealing now.

Calendargirl Fri 02-Apr-21 12:35:07

An elderly aunt died and my sister and I were left a watch and a locket from her will, to sort out between us which we would like. Sister asked me which I would prefer, sight unseen. As I didn’t have a decent wristwatch, I chose the watch.

Was disappointed when they arrived, it was a fob watch, not wrist. Sister liked the locket, it opened up to put a photo in, I wished I had gone for it instead.

The watch didn’t work either. Took it to jeweller who sorted it. I then found out that the watch had belonged to my grandmother, a lady I never knew. This made it feel quite special.

I have it on display now, and every day when I wind it up, I am glad I chose it and not the locket, which had no history to it.

Beswitched Fri 02-Apr-21 12:45:30

So many interesting stories. My mum and dad lived in a lovely seaside town when they were first married. Then my father got transferred by his job to a biggish city. They were gutted. Mum became pregnant with my brother shortly after and had a very difficult birth. She was told afterwards that if she'd been in the small hospital near where they used to live she wouldn't have survived, she was lucky to be in a dedicated maternity hospital with the expertise and technology to save her life.

Definitely if it's for you, it won't go by you.

allsortsofbags Fri 02-Apr-21 12:46:02

I've had a few occasions of disappointment first better outcome later in my life but most recent was DD2.

She went for a specialist job with a company that supplied parts for Rolls Royce Aircraft Engines just before all the trouble with the Boeing 737 Max and then Covid. At the time they gave the job to a man and she was so disappointed and annoyed as she was better qualified.

Just into the first Lockdown her recruiter called her to say the company had stopped it's expansion and she would have been out of work, a lucky save there. She has also been promoted in her existing company so very much a better outcome after disappointment.

Rosina Fri 02-Apr-21 17:07:31

We lost a house due to a financial disaster. It was very large with enormous gardens, and we had to downsize to a much smaller end terrace. What a stroke of luck that was - the move had resolved the crisis, we had lovely neighbours, a beautiful oasis of a home with long windows that let all the light in, a brilliant location for shops and work, and I could not have been happier. The 'big house' was on a development of similar properties and neighbours were never seen - all commuters with high walled gardens, few children and complete silence for most of the time. We have moved on again to a slightly bigger house now, but I will never forget the peace, happiness and calm I had from that move.

Alioop Fri 02-Apr-21 17:24:57

Carol57 I'm with you. Marriage was rubbish and now I've my own lovely home so better now without him