Noisy children.

Why do children have to make so much noise? Screaming should only happen when in fear and certainly not just to be heard, and a child throwing a tantrum should be very firmly taken indoors until they have calmed down. I have 3 children next door to me. They play in the garden, they chatter and laugh and are an absolute delight - certainly not restrained in any way, so it can be done.

Sounds extremely annoying to me, they are spoiling the amenity and peace of your garden. I don't think that there's much you can do about it. I would consider the noise cancelling headphones, using them to listen to the radio and music. Like all children they will grow up, which is not much consolation.

I feel your pain! My neighbours have noisy children because the adults are noisy. They are out morning til night. Music playing, smoking and swearing. Today’s delight is a bouncy castle in the garden. I don’t mind the noise of kids playing I’ve had my own children but this is just inconsiderate. Oh and they light fires on a regular basis that stink. Which means sitting out in the evening isn’t possible.

You have my sympathy OP. I can't bear the sound of screaming children. Ordinary calling to one another and laughter is one thing but I know the kind of hysterical, high pitched noise you're referring to and goes through me like a knife. When we lived in a village with close neighbours, when mine were little, such noises were a cue for me to call them in, dispense drinks and just let them calm down for a few minutes whilst stressing that persisting in such behaviour would result in being called inside indefinitely owing to disturbing the neigbours!
There's too much treating children like demi-gods these days and the attitude that, "kids will be kids" is all pervading. Not in my house it isn't. Children need to learn a little self control or they grow up not understanding that they can't just please themselves all the time.

Lemsip
I take my youngest granddaughter to the local toddler park most weeks, and we invariably have it to ourselves.
During lockdown there was a playing field in a neighbouring village, which for some reason hadn’t been closed.
We would take a ball and a picnic , same thing there, never met a soul. Where are all the children?
Don’t tell me, in their back gardens annoying people!

Children are noisy...but its just a phase, they are growing and changing and it wont be long before this noise will stop , and they have just been let out after a winter of being in not seeing friends etc......

This problem is what keeps me from downsizing - the fear that I would end up with an intolerable situation. We all know and appreciate that children need to let off steam and enjoy freedom to do so. However they must also learn to respect other people's needs. Playful laughing is acceptable, constant screaming is not. One of the reasons I never go on holiday during school holidays!!

How fab that the parents join in and the children are having fun. They won’t be young and screaming long. The ball banging is another issue and your well within your rights to ask for that to stop

We are surrounded on all sides by noisy children barking dogs and student neighbors. We put our radio on in the garden , invite the neighbour next door for bbq’s give him cake and dinner and take his dog out for walks . Our other neighbours have 3 generations living there, so we send birthday cards to the latest addition, invite them round when we have our grandson to visit ( pre covid ) and We laugh at the kids having fun and match our noise to theirs. It’s not ideal but I’d never be driven out of my garden so it’s a trade off. I find that there is more awareness from them when making noise because we are nice neighbours too.

Gwiz5
You sound like perfect neighbors!
12jade34
Agree with you completely

I can sympathise. Next door is technically an illegal childminder and at times tfe screaming and shouting is horrendous. No banging with balls though. If the fence belongs solely to your neighbour then don't think there is much you can do other than point out how annoying it is. If jointly responsible then that's different you can insist it stops in case of damage. Yes chikdren haven't had access to a lot of activities in the past year but surely your neighbour's chikdren have been able to play outside, go to a park so they haven't been cooped up like some. I'm convinced we will have a generation of adults with hearing difficulties soon given all the noise children are subjected to. Notice how loud adults speak on phones when outside - there is already a problem with them.

annsixty - I completely understand and sympathise. We have had the most wonderful neighbours over the years in this house. Two children, boy and girl have grown up next door and have been playing in their garden every day with the minimum of noise or fuss. The odd shriek and lots of laughter. A joy to hear.
For the last few years a neighbour about 3 houses up the hill has been looking after her 3 grandchildren during the school holidays. They have a trampoline. The screams, yells, shouts, crying, arguments, even louder screams and almost constant boinging sounds carry clearly to our garden.
One day last summer, our young neighbour (now 14) told me they were the noisiest children he had ever heard and were driving him nuts!!

You have my sympathy annsixty we had a similar problem some years ago, DH asked the neighbours if they could quieten down a little, that evening we had a visit from a number of 'bullies' including neighbour who proceeded to give DH a good hiding.
We moved within 3 months. The police weren't interested.

My neighbours children were like this , parents took no notice at all. If the noise was getting to much I would take my radio outside, pop it up on the joining fence and put Radio 4 on loudly. It always did the trick. Parents got fed up having to listen to my noise so went inside and kids followed. Job done. They have moved, thank goodness and the new ones are completely different.

Noise cancelling headphones or eat defenders. They really work.

Live and let live. We have some noisy children over the fence, but that is preferable to the loud music the parents put on. Noise cancelling headphones help, and you can listen to soothing music
When our GC come they ride in a battery powered car thst we bought to amuse them - now that really is LOUD!

Children have always been noisy tbf. Think because of the lockdown which must seem alien to them, we have to just accept it, what must it have done for their mental health
Personally I love to hear them playing, when you’ve had a son who had cancer at the age of 3, it’s great that they’re healthy and alive

Annsixty I sympathise. That screaming child would drive me bonkers too. I’m happy to hear children laughing and playing and even crying if there’s a reason but constant screaming Arrrrgh! I’d play classical music very loud and when they complain say you’re drowning out the screaming ? I am joking but this sort of thing brings out the worst in us.
I had a lovely family next to me for a few years. Two young boys, an excitable dog and enthusiastic footballing dad. The constant bang bang of ball against fence drove me potty, and the balls sailing over the fence and battering my flower beds even more so, and which I regularly had to toss back over the fence. I never fell out with them though but when the barrage made the fence post weak and wobbly I did ask them to replace it, which they did with good grace.
After they moved and I was trimming shrubs in the border next to the fence I found three punctured footballs and a bedraggled teddy. He went into the washing machine and now sits on my bed, a reminder of a lovely if noisy family.

I would certainly ask them to stop bouncing the ball up the fence - that would drive me mad. I don’t think there’s very much more you can do about the other noise, as it sounds like normal exuberant children let out after being couped up for the winter. You never know, it may die down as the summer goes on. Not sure if it’s covered by noise abatement laws, but you could make enquiries if it really is over and above what could be considered as normal.

My daughter has three healthy, exuberant boys. The elderly lady one side complains that my daughter must give them too much sugar. The elderly lady the other side says she loves to hear them as she worked with disabled children who sadly couldn’t run around enjoying themselves.
To my shame I was a mother who always told my children not to screech and shriek whilst having fun outside, and turned them into scared little children. I definitely wouldn’t have allowed repeated kicking of a football or whacking of a tennis ball against my fence or a neighbour’s.

Annsixty, I feel for you. I ended up and moved house because of my neighbours and the noise. It does get to you when it's continuous that you are just waiting on it starting, it can cause bad anxiety. Kids have to play, of course they do, but the ball kicking isn't right at all.

We have four gardens abutting the side of ours and about ten years ago a family with two young children moved into the house nearest to ours. Their garden is very small, the end of it being about ten yards from our back door. The youngest child, a girl of about two, was a screamer - she could scream non stop for at least two hours. On summer Sunday afternoons we had to go out or go mad. This went on for several years. I didn't say anything because someone mentioned they thought there was something wrong with the child. Eventually she stopped. We now have two little girls in the fourth garden along who play out whenever the weather is nice. Yes, the little one gives the odd scream when she is over excited or she can't get her own way, but this is nothing exceptional and I love to hear them playing and miss them when they're not there. The little one can tantrum for England and this just makes me laugh. I really sympathise - little girls seem to go through this screaming phase and it can go right through you.

I would ask them to stop the fence banging as fences are expensive to replace! Don't envy you though in having to address them.

I'm sorry but I would much rather hear children playing over a lot of other noises you could have. Loud music not of my tastes or adults arguing-both of which we have had in the past. We also have children nearby & my neighbour yells over the fence telling them to be quiet. I had a real go at her last year about it. They are nice well behaved children & yes they do shout a bit but so did my boys-so did I at that age. I love hearing them having fun & if I want a quiet read in the garden I use earplugs.
The irony is that my neighbour is very deaf & when her friends come round they sit just the other side of our hedge & shout at each other for hours! Do I moan about that? Well so far not to her face anyway!
Live & let live.

Hi if it’s your fence children are using as a goal post then yes you can complain. I’m also disabled and I can’t find anything more nice than the sound of kids playing outside having fun after the year we’ve all gone though. When my neighbors grandkids visit one of them screams constantly so I understand what you mean drives me up the wall. So I neither go for a walk or stick in my air plugs and listen to music. But guess my grandkids do same to them but I don’t notice it because I’m having fun. If you live in a house for 45yrs maybe it’s time to downsize and move into an area with bungalows other wise kids will grow and get more noisy and do it more to wind you up. Because that’s what kids do they play and have fun. Or you could get to know them better.