Joke! Remember them?

I'm currently trying to think of a pun or joke which refers to crudities and crudités
Fanny C Why!?
:eave that to the Night Owls tonight; I'm sure they know a few.
If not, I can help out provided they're not going to be used here!
Sorry about the librarian; didn't know you were one of those amongst your many talents!
Here's to your Good Health
OoRoo

Oh Rufus, your library 'joke' is horrible

Hello Rufus don't worry re trolls.
They were all over the site, on umpteen threads.
Most posters know what happened.

I'm currently trying to think of a pun or joke which refers to crudities and crudités...

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide. The librarian says "No way! You won't be bringing it back!

A man walks into a library and asks for books about paranoia. The librarian whispers "they're right behind you"

Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There's no need to remind him every six months about it.

This thread was set up to receive Jokes, Comical stories and humorous articles generally hopefully to counter the general apathy that seemed to be growing.
Unfortunately, some morons known as trolls, managed to post some material, which I never got chance to see, that upset some members and was deleted.
Also, unfortunately this thread now contains a series of "obituaries" showing where those deletions occurred. and which confirm to the morons that they achieved their objective
The thread now presents a poor image and I have asked HQ to remove the rest of the rubbish, but I'm told it can't be done, yet whole threads can be "taken down"; no problem!
Go figure! .
The thread is still open for business!

A married couple were in Church and the wife turns to her husband and says
"I think I've just let off a silent fart! What should I do?"
Husband replies; "Buy a new battery for your hearing aid!"

sorry I'll get my coat
Sunseeker Put that coat back at once! We need you!
Don't worry; you'll be safe!
Did you know that lightning never strikes the same place twice?

After the first strike it's never the same place!

Sunseeker This is how .....? No don't go!

Why are there no aspirins in the jungle?

Because the parrots eat an all.

I was struggling to figure out how lightning works - then it struck me

(sorry I'll get my coat)

Good one Rufus - wish I'd heard this year's ago
Ro60 Thanks; I liked it too; one of GreatNans, I think!

Seeing all the deletions occurring lately I'm getting a nervous twitch about entering anything to this thread for fear of demeaning ; e.g. I've come across one involving a fire extinguisher, but even they can be demeaned in some people's' eyes, I imagine!
I'm disappointed at the stony silence around here, but I guess we can blame it on Covid like everything else!
Keep trying!
Good Health
OoRoo

Good one Rufus - wish I'd heard this year's ago - if I ever travel by train again it might come in useful ?

How does a politician sleep at night?
First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.

Thanks, Rufus!

Racist, sexist and classes jokes? Reported
Amber Well done! You have my full support.
It's a shame that some people must despoil my wholesome "Jokes" thread with their crudities
They come no where near the required standards of subtleness!
Btw; I've taken the precaution of saving the thread just in case GNHQ arrive with their "scorched-earth" policy
Thanks again!
Good Health
OoRoo

Oh dear looks like a couple of new members who mistakenly think GNs are easily shocked and upset. Are the schools on holiday?

Reported for rudeness AS

Can you get reported for being bad tempered?

*classist

Racist, sexist and classes jokes? Reported, Shaniqgran and nanna8. Disgusting.

How do you know if you are a bogan?
You let your 15 year old daughter smoke at the dinner table,
in front of her kids.

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If you just google the words 'joke sites' a complete page of web sites will drop down.

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