The Argy Conglomerate

Well, they do like a good sing-along, don't they?
Sounds like Cardiff Arms Park.
(Between ourselves, I do think that those inflatable leeks that they are waving about are a little, er, tacky.
Ditto the daffodil headbands.
No class.)

Oh yes, ixion, no class. (Hastily hiding inflatable leek and removing headband)

BTW, who's having Sir Tom for the night (as it were)?

Ooops - Has anyone remembered to feed the llamas today? They think those leeks are real and are stampeding across the floor .. watch out Sir Tom

Quick jet, wave your bloomers at them, 'head 'em off at the pass.
No (sighs). At the llamas, not Sir Tom.

Hang on Sir Tom! Stop singing so loudly and they may slow down.

That WAS unusual!

Well, he’s safely back on stage, but I’m not sure anyone will have him for the night. Gnasher’s back is quite bony and he was bouncing about a lot!
He sound a bit squeaky!

You can keep your hat on ixion!

Well I hope Sir Tom hasn’t hurt my llamas. They’re very sensitive you know.
Whose knickers is Gnasher sporting on his head?
Ooh Toms in good form tonight. Look at those hips wiggle. I hope he doesn’t overdo it. ?

ixion take your bloomers off your head and wear them like the rest of us. Really, anything to get Sir Tom’s attention

Jet did you have to!

What do you think girls have my exercises with Biccy paid off?

I think Maw might be a bit busy tonight catching up on all she’s missed but I do think we ought to invite her next week for a welcome back bash.
Besides which we have enough women throwing themselves at Sir Tom already. Jet you hussy

It wasn’t me! It was another girl.

Time to get ready for our big moment, knickers back on girls!

Doodle that’s amazing! Well done - our star of the show!

Er the only problem is I’m stuck like this. I can’t get my leg back down .
Just dance round me gang and pretend it’s all part of the show. Don’t forget to kick those legs high and scream like they do in France. I see Fronk is in the bar tonight waving his flag.

Oh for goodness sake will someone tell May Hem it’s a can can dance not a strip club. Get her off the stage Thor.

Can you flap your foot doodle?
At the end, just do that behind us and pretend you're waving goodbye.

Well, the punters love it.
Sir Tom looks a little nonplussed

I’m flapping ixion I’m flapping but how am I going to get off stage ?

Here, stick this on while I think of something

Right everyone grab a bit of doodle and hold her aloft, then dance sideways off stage while she flaps her foot. Smile, smile, smile.

Grab the llamas' trailing bits reins. We'll get them to trot on and they can drag you off, behind our flouncy skirts.

Phew! Good job we practiced carrying the freezer yesterday .. shshhh ..

Just give Sir Tom a pint of the best poteen ixion he’ll be fine ..