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Doula

(32 Posts)
Dalfie5577 Wed 23-Jun-21 18:08:54

My newly pregnant step daughter has announced she is hiring a doula for the birth and for a few sessions after. The only time I heard of such a thing was when Meghan Markle apparently hired one. Does anyone on here know anyone who has had experience of one? My first reaction was to feel sorry for her mum and her partner for obviously not being considered sufficient support. What are your thoughts? I would love to know more to improve my understanding!

NotSpaghetti Thu 24-Jun-21 12:16:59

ayse
Midwives are in short supply.

My daughter-in-law was booked for home but went in because there were "no midwives available".

You say I wish midwives were far more available to the general public rather than the reliance on hospital based births.

It's not "either or".
At the moment it's "neither-nor"

Sarnia Thu 24-Jun-21 12:18:26

ayse

I had me second child in Basingstoke in 1973. My NHS midwife did all these things without a doctor in sight. My midwife was always available both before and after the birth. I had a maternity home birth and she took me there and back on the same day. It was a great service and I wish midwives were far more available to the general public rather than the reliance on hospital based births.

Still, each to their own

30 years ago your experience was the norm but not today, sadly. The NHS is seriously short of midwives right across the pregnancy journey from ante-natal through to post-natal care. I know it distresses many of them that they have no time to give the care they would like to provide. I started my family in 1972. We were the lucky ones.

Bellsnwhistles Thu 24-Jun-21 12:22:27

My DIL hired one for birth of their first (and only). Great support as doulas know all about local hospitals, latest techniques, and a more professional approach than relatives whilst also providing great emotional support. Think my son was grateful for the service too as he can be a bit overwhelmed and panicky at times and they had a (planned) home birth. Doula also helped for about 6 weeks post birth.

Cherrytree59 Thu 24-Jun-21 12:38:10

My daughter in law used the services of a doula.
This was the first time time I had heard the term.

My Dil's parents are both dead, so no help and support from her mum.
No sibling support either.
We live some distance away.

I think it was quite a sensible decision.

My son and daughter in law were both hoping for a home water birth but unfortunately it was not to be.

The baby was in distress and came in to the world via a middle of the night cesarean.

As mentioned by previous posters, the parents are helped to prepare for the birth, in some cases the birth itself and with option of follow on support

Not everyone has a mum or extended family close by.

Grammaretto Thu 24-Jun-21 13:19:51

Yes ayse wouldn't that be nice.
It doesn't seem likely to happen though.
In fact when the maternity hospital closed and was incorporated into the new general hospital in Edinburgh 10 years ago as the Centre for reproductive health there wasn't anywhere in the architect's plans for prenatal care and very little postnatal. The midwives themselves had to push for it.

PaperMonster Thu 24-Jun-21 13:59:11

I looked into having a Doula ten years ago for my daughter’s birth but I couldn’t afford one sadly.

There’s no way I’d have wanted my mother with me! And my OH wasn’t at the birth. But because of my own peculiar set of circumstances I had a student midwife with me all the time and the loveliest of student doctors with me much of the time. I was very well looked after!

I think a Doula is a great idea!