The Argy back to basics.

We have had enough trouble with drugs at the Argy GSM. Sergeant Nick Kerr and Inspector Groper often come in and sniff the air.
I know the young Mullers Lemon. I went to his 90th birthday party.
Happyme there seem to be a lot of scared scarecrows running away from the fields.

Make sure that you padlock the hut, Lord L is an escape artist.
I once locked him in the wine cellar and he got out through the air duct that regulates temperature.He’s thin and bendy.?

Oh my cheques are good, but this is Lord Lemongrove’s cheque ( pinched his chequebook for a week) so anything is possible.
Have discovered the two hussies you saw him with are Lurpak Lil and Big Bertha, goodtime gals if ever there was.
I am managing very well without his Lordship, old Dodders seems lighter on his feet, he has taken to smoking a pipe, maybe it’s something to do with that? The Manor is really peaceful, and young (ish) estage gardener Mullers is keeping me company in the long evenings.

Great idea Happy. Potting them on as Monty Don would say (pun completely intentional). I’m sure Doodle would be so taken with the enterprising diversification (I read a dictionary in the library yesterday, not much else to do) she wouldn’t notice the takings had disappeared. Lemon’s cheque being honoured (pigs might) would be a bonus.

Good idea GSM, I have a feeling that cheque might bounce. We could set up some heat lamps in the Argy cellar (I think Lemon has already bypassed the electric meter) and feed them poteen, will make them super strength...... punters will pay more dosh ?

Ooh ixion perhaps add some ‘incontinence wear’ to the outfit for long stake outs. Perhaps the er plants in the potting shed could be liberated to boost the takings then Doodle need never know. I have ‘friends’ here who know people who would buy the objects in question … just need to liberate Lord L first, I’m sure poteen would do the trick, then pounce.

Did you know you were standing in a puddle ixion......ooh I see...whoops...sorry ?

Tasteful Lemon, that'll be a first ??.

The Ravens have uncovered the source of Lord L's sudden wealth......he is growing ?? ? in the potting shed and selling it to those hussies, that wasn't cigars you saw him smoking AGA.

Ruby and Rowena have taken themselves off to find a scarecrow to scare.

Ooh 9/6.....that will do. (It was only 5/3 but don't tell lemon)

Nil desperandum! I will write a cheque out for the takings....how much was it I can’t remember...9/6d?

??Que? AGA
You'll have to shout - can't heard a d**n thing in this get up.
And as for ever needing a quick wee, forget it?

Looks like the potting shed caper is off as Lord L is locked in there. Lemon has the cheque book so I think we can say goodbye to our hard earned cash...sigh..
I hope it hasn't taken hours to get into your camouflage outfit ixion.

Blooming cheek! it was marydoll wot done it ( in the past anyway) as she used the takings for trips to Italy with one of the waiters from the Soprano Bistro down the road.

I have confiscated Lord L’s cheque book, whisky and labradors until he learns to behave himself, and the potting shed will be his only home for the next week.Don’t give him free poteen or free anything else please.I am taking his cheque book with me on a visit to Madame Pom Pom’s ( down by the gas works) tomorrow and buying myself some tasteful togs.

All hands to the potting shed it is then, need to find the Argy takings...or whats left of them ?..... before doodle gets back, she'll be soo ?. But are we sure lemon hasn't set Lord L up as a patsy (yes I did mean patsy not pasty). Hasn't she got form for swiping the Argy takings ??
per ardua ad potting shed et ultra

Perhaps take the llamas to see the hussies off as it seems Brunhilde, perfect for the job, is otherwise engaged. Is she by any chance practising for the Olympics?

Your camouflage will work well ixion. The shed is surrounded by trees and bushes so you won't be noticed. If the hussies are in there we can tempt them out with some of that perfume you made for the Argy spa.

Do we need to rescue doodle as well?

Ooh, can I come, please?
Have the kit still and the stamina.
Per ardua ad potting shed

#up4it

Ruby and Rowena on standby and practising their squawking........loudly ?.

Could swear I have just seen doodle paddling like mad up river, followed closely by someone looking suspiciously like Brunhilde in a viking longboat. The crowd on the Embankment are cheering.....they think its the Oxford v Cambridge boat race!!

We need to visit the potting shed after dark as it may be where our money is. Ruby and Rowena can be lookouts and squawk loudly if Lord L appears.
I just hope he hasn't hidden his young hussies in there.
With luck lemon has grounded him at the manor and locked all the doors so he can't escape.

Or are the takings in the potting shed?

Quick morning briefing from Ruby Raven..

Lord L staggered out of Argy in the early hours, relieved himself on the bush outside.......I really hope that isn't Brook ?.....he sashayed down the road in the direction of the Manor singing ? who wants to be a millionaire ? and on reaching the potting shed slid through the door after a few furtive glances round. Probably hiding from lemon

No, it was my novice Rowena who got lost over Italy and caused a stink at the Palace, she was covering for Ruby who'd gone AWOL , was eventually found sleeping on duty and has now failed her drug test. Keeps squawking about pasties.

ixion The Ravenmaster usually only gives the ravens a light trim these days, Ruby is currently sporting a few additional pink tail feathers courtesy of nice fan I found in the closet and a spot of glue.

Bert the Beefeater still struggling with my chastity belt lock at the moment, lots of huffing and puffing going on ......don't intend telling him I found a key that fits hanging on the back of the toilet door.

Shall send Ruby to tail Lord L when he leaves the Argy ?

Too late! Have already found out...and although Lord L is a loveable rogue he has gone too far this time. There will be repercussions I can tell you.?
A young hussy on each arm indeed, let me at him!

If lemon finds out what he is up to he will get more than his wings clipped.

Don't your ravens have to have their wings clipped, Happyme?

(Might be what Lord L needs, by the sound of it)