Blamers

In our 51 years of marriage my DH has rarely accepted that it was his fault!! He's now wary of blaming me because he knows I will yell at him - there is only so much blame a buddy can take!!

Yep My husband - how or why we are still together is a mystery !

Yes lots of people blame others and do not accept responsibility for their actions
It's very sad
I have full respect for someone who will own up and say they are sorry
and face up to the consequences of their actions.
Everyone can make mistakes

‘’ 'you made me do it! '’’. Or rather ‘’it’s because of you I’m like this’’
Yes I know a few but not for much longer, fed up with wearing that badge.

My daughter from first marriage and my now second husband. Both destructive drinkers. Always someone else's fault never them.

Absolutely my sister she also rewrites history and is adamant her version is the true one.

a sign of immaturity, often cited in psychiatry as a personality disorder. my exes favourite remark, 'you made me do it! '

I despair that we now live in a blame culture where everything has to be someone’s fault. We can no longer have an accident or just one of those things.

yes my mother she would deliberately do something even damage things then blame me, even blamed me for my father having a heart attack then when he died it was my fault as well which she said to me in front of my then young children

Remined me of the tale about my ex BiL when he was a child denied that he hadn’t broken the neighbours window - with a ball that had his name on it!

My situation - I always seem to get blame and censure when I have done my utmost to help family

Yes it took me years to realise that this was the essential characteristic of my first husband. You fall for their stories of why they are like they are, you can change all that, bad people and then when you become history you are blamed for everything. This means of course that his family who were blamed for everything can now blame me. Massive rewrites that come down to him never ever owning anything, ever being responsible. He was attractive and charismatic which aids them in their delusions. He’s dead now rest his soul leaving a tangle of confusion. Whether he really blamed others or manipulated others to think that and therefore not expect him to step up to the plate is a moot point.

Sadly yes, quite a number of people over the years. I currently work with someone who is alienating a lot of colleagues because of this.
When I tried to discuss it with her, listening to her, it appears that for her, there's was always something wrong with the people or the conditions that made it impossible for her to do 'a good job' in every previous role and currently!
Likewise in the area's of her personal life disclosed - problems are all because of somebody else's actions/view.
When I pointed out recent situations that could have been easily resolved if she'd considered an action (very minor in some instances), every single one was firmly planted on someone else.
Utterly infuriating.

Grief yes! Doesn’t everyone?

My brother. He was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder a few years ago, so I have to accept that this might be a reason, but that doesn’t make it easier to handle. He is single, so I feel I need to support him, but he drives me mad at times.

Known several in my lifetime.

Yes my sister and her family. She hated both DIL. And now prefers the first one. I have been blamed for everything for many years. Have dumped the lot of them. Dont need their sick family dysfunction in my life anymore. Walking away was the best thing I ever did.

Yep, a step-son, very sad.

when you point the finger of blame, there are always 3 pointing back at you! - so true!

I got the detention at school because my sister blamed me for something I didn't do (she did it!) and then reported me to the headmistress!

Most certainly YES a family member and they will never change------sad the relationship is damaged because of it.

Oh yes. One of my daughters, even when she has been found in the wrong, the apology she gives is turned so you feel that it was your own fault.

I divorced him!

My mother and brother

Oh yes, it’s amazing the convoluted ways in which something can be my fault!

Yes - my sister the same