Family rows over wedding dress

Well I for one didn’t like the dress and if I were the bride’s mother I would be disappointed but that would be as far as it would go.
It is the bride’s right to choose her own dress and that should be respected by all.

I got a bit confused and thought she meant the Millais painting where the dress is covered in flowers. But have now seen the one she is making; very pretty. I would have loved that in the 1970s, gorgeous. Why do the family have a say in what she wears? Bonkers.

This is what makes Say Yes to the Dress so fascinating to watch; all the family disagreements with mom, sisters, bridesmaids, sometimes brothers, occasionally fathers, bridegrooms and gay best friends, all of whom have their own agenda which has very little to do with what the bride wants, or actually suits her.

Her day,her choice.
My wedding dress was red,and i had lovely comments about it.
I got married on valentines day too.

It’s the bride’s day, so the bride’s choice. What business is it of anybody else. I think it’s a beautiful dress, and I hope she wears it.

It’s absolutely no one’s business except the bride, the mother sounds a really selfish cow.
No one else had any say on my wedding dress, I saw one I loved in a bridal magazine, went to the nearest stockist and that was that and it was cream not white as at 32 I thought pure white would be a little hypocritical but that is just my choice

Hellogirl1

I once saw a beautiful all black wedding dress at an exhibition, but my daughters were horrified when I suggested black for their weddings, but like has been said, Bride`s choice.
When daughter 2 went shopping for her dress, her fiance went with her, as, in his words "You`re not walking down the aisle in something I don`t like"! And she actually bought his choice!

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There was a beautiful black dress i the window of a wedding shop I walked past once. Very much the wedding style of the time when I saw, it although I suppose it could have been an evening or prom gown. Would love to have had it if I had been getting g married!!

Historically, the white wedding dress is very recent, although probably in use before Queen Victoria's wedding as the Napoleonic era saw loads and loads of white muslin dresses.

However it was in the 19th century that the white wedding gown became the emblem of purity and virginity. Before then these two supreme female virtues were signified by the bride's hair do or what she wore in it. Edelweis in Austria, orange blossom in Britain and France and myrtle in Denmark and most of Germany.

If the bride in question here is from the Bible Belt of the USA the whole row is about her not choosing to wear white and thus publicly stating that she is NOT a virgin - imagine the fuss if our grandmothers had chosen any other colour than white, or indeed if they choose white when already pregnant!

I would definitely elope if I were her!

A white dress once was supposed to mean the bride was 'a virgin'. Not a necessity - some have been married before e.g.Megan Markle!!! It us the bride's day hence bride's choice. Pity those that don't like her choice have nothing else to worry about!

Christian brides should wear white!! What a load of codswallop! Wrong on so many levels. Firstly I doubt the bride is a virgin (no disrespect but the number of virgin brides must be miniscule). Secondly, as others have said white wedding dresses were unknown until Queen Victoria chose to wear white. Other than high society who emulated the Queen most more ordinary brides wore their best dresses or suits. So that puts the tradition story to bed. I'm guessing that the OP was writing from America where Christianity is very much about being seen at church and doing what the others in the congregation thinks of them rather than living a good kind life.

Looking at pictures of beautiful, colourful wedding dresses made me want to go back in time to 1970 and do it all differently, instead of an £8 white dress from the rail in a department store. Would have to be a different man though.

M0nica I loved shopping in Reigate in the 60/70s.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

The bride should wear what she wants. And it’s good to break traditions that don’t suit you! Wish I’d had the confidence to do what I wanted for my wedding but I was only 22 and the two mums bulldozed me into their very conventional expectations.
Hope she sticks to her guns. The dress is stunning and she’s even making it herself! Wow. I’m impressed!

I love it, it's ethereal. What a painting. Bride's day her choice, she has class.

That dress is really pretty. The bride should choose.
I’m not sure if I’d have had the courage to give my mum no say at all, but fortunately, since we were not well off, the range of preloved dresses was not huge and there was a choice of 1 that fitted and looked good on me.
1 DD chose green for her bridesmaids dresses, which I made.
The comments about her choice of colour were appalling, rude, unkind, almost ill wishing, but she didn’t care. One guest was ‘cancelled’ from the wedding because of her comments. She was most offended and said her remarks had been made with the best of intentions.

She should wear what she likes. Anything else is unreasonable. And there could be a lot "worse" choices than such a lovely dress.

It’s up to the bride and no one else’s business.
My DIL ditched her white dress on the day and wore a mini dress with over the knee socks and a strawberry beanie hat. It was a wonderful wedding. I had bought a posh frock and wore it anyway. ?

Her family sound awful! Its her dress her day her choice! If it were me i would tell them either put up or shut up and if they cant then they would not be welcome to attend!

It’s a beautiful dress and how brave of her to make it herself. It sounds as if the family are well on the way to spoiling the day. It’s her day and she should have her choice of dress. How many of her female relatives would have agreed to someone else’s choice? I have seen quite a few brides in long white dresses with very pronounced bumps! Immaculate conception?

What a beautiful dress, and making it herself. I made my own (very simple) and my daughter's, which was all silk and rather more complicated, but both were lovely. Ophelia's dress is different and lovely.

Bride needs to stick to her guns, and uninvite any whingers. It does show the wisdom of keeping it all secret until the day though.

My sister told the family she was 3 months pregnant a few weeks before her full Catholic Church wedding (they had a meeting with the Priest beforehand who said he was delighted for them) ... My Mum, however raised merry hell with my sisters choice of dress, which (from what my sister has told me) was a flowing column style, rather bohemian, very much my sister's style. But her tummy might be obvious on the day .. and she was forced into wearing a "proper" wedding dress with flounces etc (mid '80's fashion) which my sister hated. The manipulation in demanding someone wear something that isn't their choice is appalling.

I love the "Say Yes To The Dress" - but my idea of hell would be a big wedding for myself; there were 12 at mine and that's only because MIL insisted cousins and partners from her side were invited. I wore a knee length white lace dress (sounds nicer than it was) bought in Peckham High Street in my lunch hour - want to add my older sister loved it and wore it a couple of years later at her second wedding (couldn't have our wedding photos next to each other, lol!).

I love the idea of colour on a wedding dress!

Well all I can say is what a selfish family this poor girl as. At end of day it’s her wedding her choice. If they don’t like it then I’d say don’t come.

She should have what she likes..When i remarried, id bought a wedding dress from a charity shop,it came as a tophalf & skirt half, but cream satin with trim,i had it taken up & in on the sleeve 'holes' but when i got it back it was too tight,and too late to change it, so a few of us went to local debenhams bridal and the girls/ ladies were getting accessories for their outfits, as i looked through the wedding dresses or separate top halves that they stocked.But id found nothing, so they all went to wait for the bus while i had a quick look on other racks of prom dresses- and there it was- the most perfect long darkish RED prom ballgown perfect for me as a long full length wedding dress! (Im only short) it had a full skirt and was a strapless style (even had straps if i wanted to add them) and a tiny train at £99 was a bargain! I bought it quickly and didn't show anyone what I'd bought- later i just put a couple of stitches in the darts underarms and the next day at my wedding everyone was so surprised it was a red dress, but suited me perfectly and looked stunning.It still fitted in with our colourway too as original dress 'top' had red trim so I'd worked the colourway around that, as it was an autumn wedding. I gave other dress back to charity shop. And after a few years donated the red one too.

I love that second dress and hope that is the one she has chosen rather than the first one which looks like she has stuck a long sleeved red t-shirt underneath in case she feels cold.
Oh dear how catty I sound?