Why do some people inform an adult person who is tall of the fact that he or she is tall?

MayBeMaw

Has EP left the building?

EP? Left the building?
???

For example, each week eight men all of average height go along to a wordprocessing class. They tend to wear jeans and jumpers or perhaps a casual shirt and chinos. They sort of blend, nobody stands out. Some of them have some facial hair although not all

One week one of them arrives very clean shaven, in a three piece suit , as he is going to a job interview after the class without going home in the meantime

Can’t you see that Elderly Person ?

I spent most of my working carer in the engineering industry where being the only woman on the block who wasn't a clerical worker was the norm.

I got quite used to having my presence being brought to the attention of everyone present. I was once the only woman among about 100 male delegates at a Conference - and a last minute substitute for a male delegate at that. The advantage was, there was no queue for the loo.

I soon got used to it and barely noticed the references to my presence. The advantages far outweighed the disadvantages.
If attention is drawn to your presence for any reason, smile pleasantly and leave it at that.

MissAdventure

I really did only realise that I'm quite short.
I had always imagined 5' 4 to be very average.
perhaps that has changed over the years?

5’5’’ is still the average for women, I think
I’m 5’4’’, same as Madonna (I don’t know why I remember this)

Oh an inch difference isn't much.
I'm really not that short then.
I reckon my family are having me on!

Is having me on, pedants.

FannyCornforth

MissAdventure

I really did only realise that I'm quite short.
I had always imagined 5' 4 to be very average.
perhaps that has changed over the years?

5’5’’ is still the average for women, I think
I’m 5’4’’, same as Madonna (I don’t know why I remember this)

I’m sure the resemblance doesn’t end there!

I agree MOnica. I can do that now, as I did with the woman I mentioned in my earlier post. I found the word she used ‘giant’ very unpleasant particularly when she talked about tall children.

At the age of 14 I was 6’1”. In the early 1960s, as a teenager, I found looks, sniggers and comments very hard. I couldn’t smile and pretend it did happen. It really affected my confidence and I can remember reading about operations to shorten legs.

It wasn’t until I started work that my confidence grew. I’ve been ‘informed’ 100s of times now about my height, it washes over me ??.

https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202109/medium-907311-42b09ddc-d20f-47f0-8b4d-a9bab4fd9385.jpeg https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202109/medium-352562-515ff851-9859-4028-b19b-d09c472e01f4.jpeg https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202109/medium-905855-29a95d23-aa84-4351-b858-ad35411ed08f.jpeg

Maw I actually look like a mixture of this

Only 2inches between us muse I can remember comments in my last year at juniors, so I would have been 11, mostly from boys.

Goodness me FannyC I'm trying to put those 3 together and come up with "you". Is this near the mark?

I really dislike the fact that I'm shrinking.

And have never looked like any of the above.

M0nica

Why not pat them on the head condescendingly?

Because I am not aggressive or sarcastic and I don't want to use my height in any way that would be referring to the difference in our heights.

M0nica

I have just reread the OP and realised it talks about people informing someone they are tall. DH certainly didn't inform the person. He just exclaimed when taken aback by someone's height.

A pronoun was used.

I really dislike the fact that I'm shrinking

You're not shrinking Callistemon, just condensing all your good bits.

MayBeMaw

It is sexist because you are saying that only women can make themselves look “less average” whatever that may mean.
Men can just as easily look individual by their clothes, style, hair (both on the head and facial) tattoos, jewellery, accessories - in exactly the same way.
It is out of date because such sexist attitudes are not usually found these days among men or women of all ages.

No I did not.

I was replying to Chewbacca. Alas I did not use the quote facility and by the time my post appeared there were other posts between the two posts.

I was not saying only about women. I was remembering being at that course and there being a wall of women who all looked much the same, so the lecturer would only perhaps notice them as individually distinct each from the others as the course progressed. I think there may have been two or three men. But the thing is even if there had been more men I cannot be not immediately noticeable due to my height. Great if I am just accepted as I was there.

Jaxjacky

How tall are you ElderlyPerson if you don’t mind me asking? It may help give some perspective to this chat. As I’ve said, I’m 5’11, which is quite tall, at school, particularly as female, it was quite noticeable, not so much now and I like being tall.

I am happy being tall and I like being tall. I just don't like being told about it or being made the focus because of comments about the fact. I don't like being stereotyped as aggressive because of being tall, as I am not aggressive.

A woman of average height can blend in or stand out depending on what she chooses to wear
These were your exact words EP that was quite explicit.
I disagreed that a woman can blend in any more or less easily than a man and I merely tried to show this by “changing” your post to a masculine version .
I don’t think you can generalise in this way.

I'm sorry ElderlyPerson, I don't know what I've said to upset you but whatever it was that's caused you any offence, I apologise. I'll leave the thread. My apologies.

MayBeMaw

Has EP left the building?

No.

I had been using the computer for quite a time, so I stopped for an eye break. I lay down on my bed and turned the light off so as to rest my eyes. I drifted off to sleep.

Good - I was afraid you might have taken exception to being asked how tall you actually are.

Callistemon

^if you go somewhere, like, say a course on wordprocessing^

That's a blast from the past!!

Yes, but I think you are a man, EP. Imagine being a girl aged 12 and already 6ft and still growing.

Yes I am male.

I went through 6 foot at sixteen.

Regarding the girl you mention. Was she you?

Callistemon

MayBeMaw

Has EP left the building?

EP? Left the building?
???

No. I had an eye break. I lay on my bed and turned the light off to rest my eyes and I drifted off to sleep.

I still can't see how I, or anyone else, has caused any offence to the OP

MayBeMaw

^For example, each week eight men all of average height go along to a wordprocessing class. They tend to wear jeans and jumpers or perhaps a casual shirt and chinos. They sort of blend, nobody stands out. Some of them have some facial hair although not all^

One week one of them arrives very clean shaven, in a three piece suit , as he is going to a job interview after the class without going home in the meantime

Can’t you see that Elderly Person ?

Can't I see what?

I was replying to a lady, the wordprocessing course that I attended did have a wall of women but there were relatively few men. I think perhaps two, one being me.

I think that you may be taking my post out of context.