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Why?

(18 Posts)
sunseeker Fri 17-Sept-21 11:38:44

Visited my husband's grave yesterday to find the flowers left last week had been taken out of the holder and thrown around. On checking other graves flower holders had been taken out and just thrown on the ground, those holders which hadn't been taken out had had the tops removed and thrown on the ground and a ceramic pot on another grave had been broken. I spoke to a woman there and she said it had also happened a couple of times in the last few weeks in other parts of the cemetery. Why do people do that? What do they get out of destroying things? I had already received bad news in the morning so this just added to my stress levels.

I had experienced this type of behaviour in the cemetery where my father is buried but not, until now, in this one.

Grandmadinosaur Fri 17-Sept-21 11:43:40

I am so sorry to hear of your obvious distress over this. It makes my blood boil regarding the lack of respect. I have no
answer as to why this happened.
Do the people who do it have no relatives of there own and think of it happening to them?
?

toscalily Fri 17-Sept-21 11:49:12

I'm so sorry it must have been very upsetting for you. I really cannot understand the mentality of people who would do this and like you, ask myself why? We have a first world war memorial in the village which is always kept clean & tidy and planted each year with a lovely display of flowers. Earlier this year some "yobs" pulled them all up but it was replanted and is currently looking vibrant & beautiful.

toscalily Fri 17-Sept-21 11:53:09

Grandmadinosaur Our posts are so similar, but that was unintentional, definitely not my copying you rather we both wrote in the same vein.

Nonogran Fri 17-Sept-21 11:53:56

Report it to the appropriate authorities. If you don’t tell them and likewise others affected, how are they to know it’s happening? They need statistical evidence & with that can make moves to install CCTV or similar.
I’m sorry you were confronted with this. I hope your next visit will be more positive & soothing.

BlueBelle Fri 17-Sept-21 12:09:19

Every now and then we have this problem too and yes it has been reported many times The last I heard was baby’s graves had been damaged and things thrown around but unless there is CCTV covering all of the cemetery what can be done ?

Daisend1 Fri 17-Sept-21 12:49:58

I have nothing but contempt for those who desecrate graves.
What sort of life compels a human being into carrying out such despicable acts.

grannylyn65 Fri 17-Sept-21 12:52:43

I absolutely agree

DiscoDancer1975 Fri 17-Sept-21 12:55:43

I’m so sorry to read this, particularly as you were already low. All I can say is, we do have to share our planet with morons...for the moment, but take solace in thinking that at least you don’t have to look at their faces every morning. They’re stuck with themselves.

Take care ?

sunseeker Fri 17-Sept-21 13:01:26

Thank you for your replies, I didn't really expect an answer as to why people do this - incomprehensible to the majority of us. I posted because, living alone, I had no-one else to vent to! Thanks again

Namsnanny Fri 17-Sept-21 13:05:36

I'm sorry you were badly affected by this. I would have felt the same way too.

Luckygirl Fri 17-Sept-21 13:08:08

Vent away! Gosh these people have no idea do they? I am so sorry that you have been upset like this.

Beswitched Fri 17-Sept-21 13:13:02

So sorry.

Some people just seem to completely lack any kind of empathy, or have anything meaningful going on in their lives. I think they see this kind of mindless and heartless vandalism as some kind of triumph or two fingers to society.

They're to be pitied I suppose, as they really life's losers, but that doesn't excuse their disgusting behaviour.

ElaineI Fri 17-Sept-21 13:19:22

Sorry to hear this. It sounds like youths having a vandalism spree and doubt they would even think how upsetting it would be. Mindless behaviour!

VioletSky Fri 17-Sept-21 13:25:34

I used to live behind a cemetery and I once had a very angry lady come around and shout at me thinking my (young at the time) children had climbed a 6 foot wall to do it. They hadn't and I would have noticed if they had.

I think she was right though and it is children and teens doing this sort of thing and awful as it is, some are just daft and thoughtless at that age.

Try not to let it hurt you too much

Grandmadinosaur Fri 17-Sept-21 21:17:10

No problem at all toscalily it’s a very emotive topic and I think we all think alike on this sad topic.

CafeAuLait Sat 18-Sept-21 01:36:04

It's horrible that people would do such a thing. Are you sure it's people though? We thought that someone had done something similar at a family member's gravesite but it turned out it was the local wildlife that enjoyed eating the flowers. We changed the type of flower and all was well.

sunseeker Sat 18-Sept-21 09:35:54

CafeAuLait

It's horrible that people would do such a thing. Are you sure it's people though? We thought that someone had done something similar at a family member's gravesite but it turned out it was the local wildlife that enjoyed eating the flowers. We changed the type of flower and all was well.

At first I thought it may have been wildlife, but wildlife would not be able to remove flower holders and be even less able to unscrew the tops from the flower holders.