Do you dislike people who disagree with you?

Galaxy

I think my friends are human. I have lied (not about Brexit, I would hope my lies were slightly more exciting) so it's not as if I am being judgemental, I just know that people are flawed.

That’s exactly it, our friends are human and we are human and all are flawed.
There are lots of good things in 21st century life but the general intolerance seems to be going up, not down.
People who seem proud of the fact they they don’t know any Conservative voters/ Brexiters / you name it/..are prime examples of this.
Fortunately I don’t come across people like this in the real world, and we all manage to rub along just fine.

Not a pleasure I can understand Zoejory passionate people I can at least respect grudgingly depending on the subject because that comes from care or worry on some level

Those people can be extremely annoying, VioletSky. What pleasure do they get?

I have a brother in law who could start a row in an empty field. He's just so boring. We all try to avoid him as much as possible

I genuinely get on with most people except the types that are like my mum and ruin otherwise pleasent times with opinion based subject, not because they are passionate but because they want an opportunity to argue with you and put you down

How my friends and family vote genuinely hasn't caused any falling out, arguments or bad feelings; not before the referendum or since. The only incident that I can recall was on the day of the result. A young colleague was so distraught and angry at the result that she approached every member of staff, as they arrived, and demanded to know how they had voted. Her lack of self control meant that she went too far and it didn't end well unfortunately.

Alegrias1

tickingbird

You beat me to it Chewbacca. I was going to say the same thing. Maybe, Algerias, you have friends that don’t admit to voting for Brexit.

Or, like most Scots, they are honest and sensible, and didn't vote Leave ?

Do people really think their friends are liars? Crikey.

I have a friend who owned up one drunken evening for voting for Brexit.

For about years we were all believing she was a Remainer then she just felt she had to spin the beans

Liar? Not sure. I'm not very keen on classing someone as a liar. She was scared. She knew she'd be criticised. We were working in an environment which was about 99% Remain.

I certainly didn't stop being her friend. And I understood her reluctance to put it out there because today people are vile towards those who vote Tory or Remain.

A fact that needs addressing I believe.

I think my friends are human. I have lied (not about Brexit, I would hope my lies were slightly more exciting) so it's not as if I am being judgemental, I just know that people are flawed.

It must have been very difficult dealing with your brother following George Floyd's murder, choughdancer. When one feels so much compassion and sees cruelty, yet knowing it would distress your mum if things blew up... horrible situation.

tickingbird

You beat me to it Chewbacca. I was going to say the same thing. Maybe, Algerias, you have friends that don’t admit to voting for Brexit.

Or, like most Scots, they are honest and sensible, and didn't vote Leave ?

Do people really think their friends are liars? Crikey.

Crikey you have a very idealistic view of people Alegrias . People lie a lot, even our friends.

You beat me to it Chewbacca. I was going to say the same thing. Maybe, Algerias, you have friends that don’t admit to voting for Brexit.

Point taken Chewbacca, but it was a topic of conversation for everyone in my social group in 2016 because it was so important. Just avoiding the topic would be one thing, but actually going one step further and actually lying about it would be something else entirely.

But, strangely enough, I have no friends who voted for Brexit.

But would they admit it if they had Alegrias? I know that 2 of my friends voted to remain and one voted to leave but 2 others have never wanted to discuss it. But, either way, it's never caused any issues between us; we agree on far more than we disagree on. Maybe it's because we see each other "as a whole person" and not just on the one facet of political persuasions.

I've got family who disagree with me but I still love them dearly! My brother is VERY right wing, a climate change denier, a Brexiteer, anti muslim, a meat lover and anti-vax! I am very left wing, have been concerned about the issue of climate change for many years, a remainer, volunteer to work to help refugees, a vegan and pro-vax! My sister is also anti-vax/conspiracy theorist, but none of the other things that my brother is. Generally I manage not to say anything that might bring the subject up, but when George Floyd was murdered it did come up, and at Christmas when he gets drunk it can be dodgy. He knows that he is right about all these things, so I wouldn't be able to change his beliefs, and he lives with my 99 year old mum and it would upset her needlessly if I tried. It must sound very cowardly of me.

I have friends who vote Conservative. I have lots of friends who voted "No" in the 2014 Scottish referendum. I have lots of friends who are very religious, and even some who believe in faeries. I have friends - and a husband - who are not vegetarian, like me.

But, strangely enough, I have no friends who voted for Brexit.

It isn't about moral certainty tickingbird, although that may well be present.

It's more about not enjoying the company of people who are not open to supporting the vulnerable in our society.

We're all free to be friends with who we want.

I do find it disturbing that some cannot tolerate the idea of being friends with someone who voted to leave the EU or who doesn’t share the same political leanings. Their certainty of moral superiority and their self righteous belief they are right and anyone with an opposing opinion is wrong and not fit to breathe the same rarified air as them is laughable. Beyond parody.

Doodledog

Was it the Dalai Lama who said that people should listen more than talk, as when you talk you are hearing things you already know, but when you listen you might hear something you didn't.

Something on those lines, anyway.

I like that.

The other one my mum always quoted was we have two ears and one mouth so we should listen twice as much as we speak.

Was it the Dalai Lama who said that people should listen more than talk, as when you talk you are hearing things you already know, but when you listen you might hear something you didn't.

Something on those lines, anyway.

The only way to get through life is to listen to other peoples opinions, and they in turn listen to you without aggression. I am 81 years old, and have mature children, grandchildren, and great grand children. None of us have ever argued with each other. We respect that we all are entitled to our own opinions, and to never force our views onto each other. We have even experienced altering our opinions by listening to others. I dislike people who agree ,rather than have an opinion. Its so pathetic.

I have a friend who over the summer met a gentleman ( I use this term loosely) on a dating site. The usual romantic platitudes were forthcoming from him and everything was going well until the first time she disagreed with a view he held. She was cancelled so quickly from his life. I often disagree with friends views but we are all still friends, everyone is entitled to their own views/opinions.

Would you dislike someone who told you your granddaughter would never get a proper job with a French degree and who also told you your son was not very good looking? When I protested she told me it was the end of our friendship! Perhaps I should add that she has never had children.

Paula Sheriff, former Labour MP, talking with great admiration and affection about Sir David Amess illustrates the fact that you can disagree politically but still be great friends.

I Have a lovely kind fun sister in law but her views are diametrically opposed to mine in many ways, so I just try to dodge any contentious issues ! Life is too short

I can get along with people of different views to me, providing there’s mutual respect. The people who told me I was a “Nazi” and a “warmonger” because, unlike them, I voted to remain in the EU - are no longer part of my life. Completely unacceptable behaviour to my mind.

It depends. I do ‘right people off’ who have questionable principles e.g. misogynist, racist, lacking compassion for others (people or animals). However, I’m a card carrying leftie (left of Centre) and believe Brexit is hugely damaging to the British, but I wouldn’t right someone off because they were a Tory or voted for Brexit if they seemed otherwise to be a decent person. I’d enjoy a mature discussion of the issues and we’d probably agree to disagree. So, for example, someone like Katie Hopkins, I wouldn’t waste any of my time on, but I quite like to listen to Tim Monthomerie, Conservative Home, because he is a reasonable, pleasant guy who will consider alternative views, even if he then rejects them.

Mumsnet is a place where there are lots of people who can’t tolerate a view if it disagrees with their own. I often find the vitriol thrown at posters in unprovoked attacks because the attacker takes issue with something the victim said, shocking and disgusting!