Exhausted Nanny

Esmay the thing that horrifies me most is how other women connive, quite unintentionally, to keep these grandparents in subjection, telling them that they will be rewarded by their grandchildren's lifelong affection, or that 'our children have such busy complicated lives'.

I never quite understand this argument when I read of the average adult spending anything up to 5 hours a day watching screens, this excludes work.

Posters themselves talk about 'loving their children/grandchildren unconditionally' as a justification for martyring themselves and destroying their health looking after grandchildren, as if anything less is not unconditional love.

In an age when most of us have worked and been able to follow any other interests we have, I cannot understand older women that can only define themselves as grandmothers and whose grandchildren are the only thing in their lives.What happens when the grandchildren reach 14-15 and start to want to spend time with their friends rather than their grandparents? All those doormat grandparents sitting alone at home staring at the wall, their purpose gone, their children and grandchildren getting on with busy lives that do not include them?

I just couldn't do it now, I don't have the energy, stamina - or enthusiasm needed to cope with three children for very long.

Although I love their visits, I'm always available for 'emergency duty', odd days or occasional weekends, I certainly wouldn't be up for any longer stints. My children wouldn't expect me to be, either.

I've done the 'parenting' thing, mainly single-handedly, thoroughly, with my four kids. That phase of my life is over, in the past, done and dusted. I have no wish to do a repeat!

SHELL60, just tell your son to arrange proper childcare!

Hetty28 I totally agree with you.

The children are at risk here, because you’re not coping. It’s a crisis waiting to happen. My goodness, I can’t even begin to understand this at all. Why you have almost just been neglected....and the children.

Where are the other grandparents? You say the mum has covid? Is that right?

There seems to be plenty of money around. Spend it on childcare, or get your son to pay someone to run his business, because otherwise, you may find yourselves looking back, and asking...’ if only ‘.

The money isn’t relevant as someone else said. Most of us I’m sure, would be happy to do this for free, but NOT at the expense of our health, and safety of our grandchildren.

Please stop now.