Things!

As we get older, most of us already have more than we need (if we're lucky) and what we most miss is time with loved ones. I find it's important to suggest something when they mention a birthday, anniversay, etc. So, rather than "don't get me anything" maybe say "how about taking me to lunch at ..." One of the nicest experiences I had for my birthday last year was being taken out for lunch to a rather nice garden centre, which was rounded off with a lovely plant that I'd admired whilst there (which is now planted in my garden and, when it flowers, will remind me of that lovely day) And a couple of hours of pleasant conversation and company. Definitely suggest some ideas (on a wide price range in case money is an issue for them).

If friends and family take no notice when we ask them not to give us "things" - then there is only one thing to do. Pass the unwanted gifts on to a charity shop.

Problem solved.

A nephew who has little money keeps giving me unwanted gifts. I am also trying to declutter and to date he has not given me anything I would use. The charity shop benefits but I would prefer it if he did not buy me anything.

For Birthdays we try to do things now instead of buying gifts. Theatre or shopping trips, meals out, days out etc. We create memories instead of gathering ‘stuff’. As a family we ask each other for suggestions for Christmas gifts, and have done so for years. It’s nice to exchange gifts at Christmas when we are all together and we always get something that we want.

I feel the same - I have nowhere to put more ‘stuff’, I’m on a constant decluttering campaign as it is. I try to keep a list of things I need, and suggest those as presents if I’m asked. I remember my husband’s granny asking us for paper doilies one Christmas, looking back, I think she must have been doing the same thing!

GrandtanteJD65 - you have said exactly what I was thinking! I've been know to take unwanted gifts to charity shops in another part of the country so that the givers can't know....

I gently suggested to my offspring a couple of years ago that we didn’t need anymore
‘stuff’.
If we can’t read it,eat it ,plant it or drink it ,Please don’t waste your money.
Worked so far !

During the pandemic and lockdowns, I bought my brother and his wife (who are both a bit awkward to buy for) Amazon vouchers, they were thrilled as they use their Amazon account to "buy" e-books, to read on their holiday's or (in the pandemic) any down time they had. I now know that if I buy them Amazon vouchers they will be put to good use.

Thankfully my famiy ask me what i would like,my relpy is no n bits n bob`s.
Surprise me,and they do.

Ps ,and maybe a spelling book TUT.

Sorry if some people don't like to be given gifts. I was always taught to accept gifts gracefully, no matter how useless they are. Thank you and a smile are the least people can give if someone is being kind and thoughtful.

I've just had this with my son.
It was my birthday last week and then we had mother's day yesterday. He asked me a couple of weeks ago whether there was anything I wanted and I said that right now, no, nothing, which between us usually means wait until there is something in a few months or something but this fell on dead ears this week.
I received a box of chocolates for each of the two events, they were chocolates that I like from Hotel Chocolat BUT I've not eaten chocolate at all in the past 3 years.
I graciously accepted them but I know the cash could have been used for something far more productive later in the year when it's needed. I'm sitting here wondering whether I can take them back to a shop and tell them I don't eat chocolate and can I have the money back that I can then put aside until when there's something I need. My son doesn't live locally so he would never know if I was able to do this.

I have stated consumables only. Pickles, garden tokens, (no sweets or chocs - diabetic), plants, lunch out, theatre trip etc. I don't mind the odd reed diffuser because I use them in my downstairs cloakroom. This all works for me and makes it easy for my girls.

As it is only my DS & Family who buy me gifts now I put anything I may like on Amazon Wish List! He then decides what to get, I get something I want & make sure not too much money is spent. Good result all round!

When I receive gifts I always feel fortunate but, as others have said, I’d prefer time spent together. My DD1 asked us to dinner yesterday and that was so special. While I was out DS dropped off a plant, biscuits and a card. All lovely but when I called to thank him and said that I had been to DDs he said that he didn’t have the time to go things like that.

Some years ago I suggested to my two best friends we only gave gifts that can be eaten,burn or die ———we have had fun with this idea for 20 years and since Covid decided no gifts.
But still get gifts from the kids but recently they have made up beautiful food baskets,with all the stuff they know we like and alcohol ! I have heard some people get vouchers for taxis the children have given us many donations to good causes over the years.

My friend and I buy a ticket for a show or concert. On the night we go for a meal before it and have a lovely time.
I'm getting my Xmas present 2021 from her on Sunday as we are going to see Giovanni from Strictly. Now that's better than a pair of pyjamas

My son takes me shopping for my present. He tells me how much I can spend and then we spend time together choosing it. This is food or toiletries for a homeless shelter which we deliver together. I love my present, I get time with my son, it fills my criteria of not having money spent on me and I don’t have to find anywhere to put it.

My family know, because I've told them often enough, I like something to drink, or something to eat, or some nice handcream, but nothing that gathers dust.
One son bought me some Liz Earle handcream for Christmas. He said he'd put a call out on Twitter for advice as to a good make and that was the one that was recommended! That made me laugh ?

I'm telling my family instead of gifts I don't need, just treat me to lunch sometime, far more enjoyable. I'm trying also to only gift them what they need and not what they DON'T need. I really need to get rid of stuff, but it's hard to do and my other half is always bringing more c**p home!!!!!

Along with several other couples we gave up gifts some years ago - we go out for a meal together that covers all our birthdays. Everyone enjoys it, and we haven't got to find a home for yet another ornament that we don't want.

Audi10 - For my 60th when I had a large party I asked for all those who wanted to buy a gift to look through the UNICEF catalogue and buy something called Plumpy Nut which was a food that could be given to starving children without bloating them. The sachets started at £5. I had the best birthday ever because people actually listened and I felt I'd made a great and worthwhile donation. For my 70th I did the same and few people actually listened so the local hospice received a box of gifts for its charity shops. The last thing I want at my age is more clutter for somebody else to go through when I'm dead.

I always ask for flowers or chocolates or tickets to cinema/show. Or to go out for afternoon tea. Don't have many ornaments any more just a pretty jug from Amsterdam, a clock from France, a rose bowl from when I worked in Romford,
some pictures from Vietnam etc things from my work travels.
Xmas I write a list. Last year was flowers chocolates a Gino cook book, karcher vac electric toothbrush. All things I really wanted and had them all.
Donate unwanted ornaments and candles etc to charity shops OP. They will sell them and make money to help others.

My kids have nailed my gifts….. they ask!!!

Garden stuff/vouchers
Books/ book vouchers

Long cardigans( I’m addicted)but will send photos of a few and I tick the one I like.

They both know my ‘colours’ ( no pastels).. flowers always acceptable.

Amazon voucher ALWAYS useful!

NO NICK-NACKS!! NO ORNAMENTS!! NO NOTHING THAT NEEDS DUSTING!!

Even my 19 and 14 year old grandkids have got the message. You only have to SAY. Also they know I’m de-cluttering as I’m moving towards ‘end of days’…. They both approve as don’t want to be landed with lift/house/garage clear out when it comes!

That’s ‘loft’ clear out . Although sometimes I do wish I had a lift…. It would help with de-cluttering!!!!