It’s nothing to do with me!

Sticking up for the underdog results in the top dog attacking the defender
Best to stay out of it.

Good advice.
I've done that several times and still keep getting myself into trouble when I do!

I will repeat that mantra daily ?

It’s taken 72 years but finally I’ve realised a few things.
A committed hypochondriac will never be well so best ignored once sympathy runs out.
A committed attention seeker will be ever thus so, again, best ignored.
An unkind person will never understand kindness.
Sticking up for the underdog results in the top dog attacking the defender.
Best to stay out of it.

I was for years the family fixer and struggled to say no. If I suggested anything and it didn't work out, I was given the responsibility of fixing it. I have learned to keep silent now and don't offer advice except to my daughter and only if she asks for it. Finally learning to step back is very liberating!

PS that little bit of wisdom took me nearly 50 years to accomplish.

You’re welcome.

Well done Wellbeck

Stress is when your gut says ‘no and’ your mouth says ‘Id love to’

Don’t get stressed, just say ‘oh dear’ and walk away.

I frequently say "That's a shame" and move on.

I'm fond of the phrase "Not my circus, not my monkeys"

I use it more and more. ?

i used to do far too much, sometimes silly things.
there was a priest who used to ask/tell me to drive his cassock to another church, as it was heavy.
he was in his 30s, six foot two, and it couldn't have been too heavy to wear, but to carry a mile, it was.
he also used to assume that i would drive him anywhere, and tell people he was coming, before asking me.
i found this difficult. i felt snookered as i didn't want to let down these other people.
he even declined another lift one time to a distant meeting, saying oh i have my chauffeur.
that really annoyed me, he hadn't asked me if i was going to that meeting.
one day he said he had invited another preacher.
i said nothing.
i knew he wanted me to jump to offer to bring them. he went on, that she had a child... difficult to travel etc.
i still said nothing.
he went on, trying to prompt the expected offer.
i then said, well i can't say i'll bring her because i have no intention of bringing her.
he almost tripped over.
and i enjoyed that delicious moment of being the worm that turned. and nearly tripped him up.

I have been a good neighbour but won't go out of my way as I used to anymore.
I won't chase around after people either now I have done it for long enough. I don't send cards to people who don't send them to us anymore.
I think you reach a stage in life and think it's always me so not anymore.

I keep out of other folks business. It can be a minefield offering advice abc helping people.

I had to finish a friendship with a woman who had huge problems, she would come round, unload, ask for advice and then tell me that I was talking nonsense, I was idiotic, and generally abuse me!
She was obviously very angry and worried, but my well meant advice wasn’t what she wanted to hear.
I gave up and have enjoyed a more relaxed peaceful way of life ever since!

Tell me about it!

I once helped a neighbour fill in her DLA form and then got lumbered with doing all kinds of things for her, despite the fact that she had a big lump of a son living at home. Its amazing how men can get out of things by being "not good at that". Fortunately she downsized to the other side of the city.

Now I dont do neighbouring and keep myself to myself. My NDN is a whinger par excellence and if I see her on my ring doorbell I just ignore it. I have become an expert in not hearing or seeing things (not wearing my hearing aid or having the right glasses handy) and making it as difficult as possible for people to contact me unless they are close friends of family. Then they can go bother someone else.

Ive never reported a thread on any forum. I despise snitches.

My DD helped a young woman who had collapsed in the road. She stayed with her until the ambulance arrived. The girl's boyfriend said she had some infection.

A week later my DD had 'some infection' which made her quite ill. A good deed never goes unpunished!

Not me (I take British reserve to the extreme) ) but my DH. He’s tried to help elderly unknown people more than once not always with the desired results!