Do you have a strategy for one of “those” days? I

Despair exists only when there is hope (JIDDU KRISHNAMURTI).

So both lead to the same end.

When you wake up feeling bleak - tell yourself that today can be a better day than you thought. As someone once said, "your mind will believe what you tell it".

Suggestions from others to go for a walk are spot on. If that's all you do that day, make up your mind to do it. We know exercise is good physically, but walking also boosts your serotonin levels - which stabilises anxiety and happiness levels.

... and keep active. It has the same effect.

This too shall pass - nothing stays the same forever.

I hope you will find some joy in life. I'm sure you will. ... lots of them!

Thank you all. Sadly a class I was looking forward to in the afternoon was cancelled which initially didn’t help.
However, lost myself in a book, walked Rosie then parcelled up some tops and trousers bought online and which, I decided I don’t need ready to post tomorrow- and felt much better!

I do have a few of those days OP every now and again. I hate it when I feel this way. Everything feels awful and you are left feeling so low.

I do enjoy walking, shopping, reading so would probably throw myself out there and do all three to get through the day.

Find something as a distraction and go with it. You seem like you have a good sense of humour, answers in a postcard, so I bet you are a fun person in real life and people enjoy your company. Best wishes.

MawtheMerrier

Thank you all. Sadly a class I was looking forward to in the afternoon was cancelled which initially didn’t help.
However, lost myself in a book, walked Rosie then parcelled up some tops and trousers bought online and which, I decided I don’t need ready to post tomorrow- and felt much better!

Seriously, community groups and organisations are crying out for creative, original thinkers like you. You are so needed.

Tomorrow it will be three years since my darling daughter died but it is what it is and I have to get on with life. She would give me a very stern talking to if she thought I was 'shirking my duties.' The garden will keep me busy as it is always my 'go to' coping strategy.

I don't listen to WH but I'm sure Ken Bruce will be keep me company. Unlike the Queen I don't do 'Quiet Contemplation' DD2 will be coming for supper and together we'll raise a glass! It's a shitty day for her as well.

Roll on Thursday!

So sorry merlotgran

Merlotgran

Like Maw I am struggling to know what I’m for these days, and my usual solution of vigorous weeding whilst berating the Almighty is no longer possible as my bad back seems to be chronic and permanent. On such days I allocate myself one job and do it properly so that the day isn’t completely wasted, and I do find that helps. And try to remember that tomorrow is another day

I'm glad your son is coming BeEmerald.

Merlotgran

Merlotgran ?

Go back to bed!

If you are retired and dont have to get up for anything in particular then why bother?

I never wake up feeling 'bleak' - always happy and upbeat. If I'm stuck indoors, though, for any length of time (e.g. back injury) I soon get cabin fever. Long walks outside make me feel just brilliant.

Whether I talk to people, or not, doesn't seem to make a difference - as I'm very independent and 'self contained'. They always get in touch before I miss them, saying that they haven't heard from me for 'ages''.

Well lucky you. Not much comfort to OP though eh ?

Mae im sorry you've been feeling like that. I clean things when I'm blue. I attack the kitchen cupboards and the wardrobes and doors. Love a good throw out and the take it all to the Salvation Army drop off bin. Obviously golf is not for everyone but wallowing a few balls is good for me.

Walloping!

So sorry to hear you felt like that yesterday Maw.
I think most of us have those days. I try to tell myself that it will pass and I will feel better tomorrow as I know it will. I then just get on with things and try to do something constructive like BigBertha although whacking a golf ball is a step too far.

I try not to dwell on unanswered texts etc as it doesn’t mean nobody cares.

Merlotgran thinking of you (flowers).

Have you any hobbies/interests that you could take up? I write books, sew ( machine) visit people. If you like visiting people, its so lovely to spend time with people who are housebound, maybe you could look into that. Nobody likes to feel they have no purpose in life, fact is fact that everyone has a purpose, its just finding what that purpose is, we are all different. What about volunteering to help in a charity shop ?

Whatever you choose to do, never forget that you do have a purpose in life..... x

Merlotgran ?

What used you work at Maw? Do you have skills that could be transferred to a voluntary role eg IT, teaching, writing, accounting?

I find a walk is the way to go - or a trip to a garden centre.

Sometimes just moving into a different environment for a while can help to shake off that hopeless feeling.

How I understand the concern about seeming needy. I am always trying to make sure people know that I am independent, even when the truth is that I need help a lot of the time, because of mobility problems. Can't bend at the moment - spine surgery coming up on Tuesday - but can hardly ring a neighbour to come and take my shoes off to get into bed!

Any beautiful countryside around you that might lift the spirits?

merlot

I have widowed, divorced and single friends and it is thanks to all you lovely people that I’m more aware and pay them a bit more attention. It was you Maw, many moons ago that first brought to my attention the difficulty of having ‘no one to do nothing with’.
I hope my friends have benefitted from the experiences you all share on here and good advice you all give.
It takes considerable strength to admit to being a bit lonely or down in the dumps sometimes, to reach out and ask for company or a chat.
Hope you’re all feeling brighter today.

Maw could you set up a GN meet near you? Just organising it could be quite a task and give you something positive and useful to do. I bet there are local Grans just wishing someone would do it.

Thank you LauraNorderr - as you and most people have realised, it’s not a question of things to do or even people to do things with
I regard myself as very independent and am generally happy to go to the theatre, ballet, cinema (matinees) or exhibitions and galleries on my own. Sometimes it’s better than having to adjust my pace to somebody else. I have even been known to have a pub lunch if out on my own.
But those who are widowed or divorced will appreciate the absence of somebody to do nothing with.
So today it’s Opera Plus then the hairdresser than probably Waitrose and a coffee.
Thank you for all your suggestions.

Just a thought .... I have signed up with Bookmark, which is a charity that uses volunteers to help children to read. It is linked with schools and can be done in person or online.

Their selection process is rigorous, as indeed it should be, and I have had to have references and very detailed identity checks as well as new DBS certificate. So it all looks kosher. And I have done their online safeguarding module, and been through an interview on zoom.

I am slightly stalled at the moment as there is a technical hitch my end in accessing the main training course.

However - it seemed to me that it might be something that will keep me in touch with the world and able to be of use, even though I am unable to leap about as I might wish.

Just wondered if having this focus and being in touch with young people might be a way of banishing the blues.