Silly Songs

There an old man called Crocket... who went to the moon in a rocket.
The rocket went BANG!

Audi10

My friends just told me one about a woman from Leeds but I think it’s too rude to put on here

There was a young lady from Leeds,
Who swallowed a packet of seeds,
Within half an hour,
She had sprouted a flower,
And her bum was covered in leaves.

Oompah oompah, stick it up yer joompah!
Rule Britannia, marmalade and jam.
We threw sausages at my old man.
They put him on a stretcher, they put him on a bed.
They rubbed his belly with a 5 pound jelly, but the poor old soul was dead.

Ma maws a millionaire
Blue eyes n curly hair
Sittinn among the Eskimos
Playin a game of dominoes
Willnae get up to wipe ma nose
Ma maws a mullionare

Yum, yum, bubblegum...
I dare not post the rest, but my mum would have had a fit if she knew I ever had said it .

My friends just told me one about a woman from Leeds but I think it’s too rude to put on here

What’s the time, half past nine, hang your britches on the line, when they are dry bring them in, put them in a biscuit tin ?

MissAdventure

Billy was a sheepdog, sitting on the grass, along came a bumble bee and stung him up the........ ask no questions, tell no lies... (Can't remember any more)

Carries on to -
Ask no questions, tell no lies, I saw a policeman doing up his Flies are a nuisance, fleas are worse, and that is the end of my clean verse.

To the tune of in a country garden

What do you do
If you want to do a poo
In an english country garden
You find a big leaf and wipe your underneath
In an English country garden
Find a big spade and bury what you made
In an English country garden

Billy was a sheepdog, sitting on the grass, along came a bumble bee and stung him up the........ ask no questions, tell no lies... (Can't remember any more)

Hitler has only got one Ball The other is in the Albert Hall His mother who was a silly old bu**er Cut it off him when he was small I remember that song from infants school although it wasn’t until older I understood it ??

I’m Popeye the sailor man
I live in a caravan
There’s a hole in the middle
Where I do a piddle
I’m Popeye the sailor man.

sung by a four year old reception child when we were having a Friday afternoon ‘concert’

MiniMoon we sang the tea was so disgusting they poured it down the drain! But I had completely forgotten the last line so thanks for that. (Will be an ear worm for days now).

Scooby scooby doo, did a poo..
Inside Shaggy's slipper.
Shaggy put it on, what a pong!
It made him shake and shiver.

(The Yellow Rose of Texas)
Oh, the Yellow Rose of Texas
And the man from Laramie
Invited Davey Crockett to have a cup of tea.
The tea was so delicious they had another cup
And left poor Davey Crockett to do the washing up.

Found it! One verse only.

But this one is naughty;

There's a Yellow Rose In Texas
Where Davey Crockett peed
This famous amber flower
Was once a plain white weed
Now it's mother nature's tribute
For his heroic deed
That Yellow Rose Of Texas
Is where Davey Crockett peed..

This sweetest rose of color
Grows wild throughout the state
It blooms for dedication
Cause Davey was so great
With Jim Bowie and others,
He died at the Alamo
One of the greatest sacrifices
The world will ever know

When you drive on vacation
And cross that Texas line
Look for them on the prairie
Their blossoms sweet entwine
They grow there to remind us
What history has decreed
Yes, The Yellow Rose Of Texas
Is where Davey Crockett peed..

..The Yellow Rose Of Texas
Is where Davey Crockett peed...