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Pushing teenagers to be more sociable

(28 Posts)
Vintagejazz Fri 15-Jul-22 09:40:57

My sister has a 17 year old daughter and a 26 year old daughter. When the 26 year old was a teenager she was out and about all the time, part of a large group, always invited to parties etc
The 17 year old is very different. She has a couple of good friends who she meets for walks or the cinema and chats to online but otherwise is happy hanging around at home, going places with the family etc.
My sister is constantly trying to push her to be more of a party girl type - can't understand why she's at home on a Saturday night "Jess would have been trying to choose which party to go to', trying to force her to ask a crowd from school around for a barbecue, doing the "when I was your age I was never at home...." etc

It's obviously making my niece uncomfortable. I've seen parents do this before. They just can't seem to accept that not all teenagers want to be social butterflies.

Surely young people come in all different shapes and makes?

MissAdventure Sat 16-Jul-22 00:03:30

My oldest grandson used to get nagged (not by us) to get out and about with his friends, who were generally up to no good.
Now the younger one gets in trouble for actually being out and about and about with with his mates, as they are generally up to no good.

Vintagejazz Sat 16-Jul-22 07:52:46

I saw a mother force her child, aged about eight, to go over and play with the other children on the green. The very reluctant child wandered over slowly, hovered uncomfortably around the edge ignored by the other kids for a good while, then wandered back.

I know the mother probably meant well but it wasn't fair on the child.