I know,I said I need to be nicer...

* So, I'm going to be caught up to date with everything as soon as her sister goes.* Only if you let her. You’re the only one who can make a change in the vibe; don’t give in before you’ve really got going ??

I have had a couple of days respite, as her sister has been down to stay with her.
So, I'm going to be caught up to date with everything as soon as her sister goes.

As for telling her family - absolutely no chance that they would be able to take on board and deal with anything.
They all have their own share of problems going on.

The break has been lovely, though.

A glimpse of how life could be...

Some people just don't understand boundaries. You need to set them for her. It's not a comfortable thing to do but this is causing you a real problem, Decide what you can cope with and set those as your limits - days, times, whatever is your tolerance level.

TBH I would have to move!

Think I'd move!!

mid not mud !!

crazyH

When you see her coming, put your coat on and say “oh I was just on my way out” ?

Oh crazyH that took me back... I had a colleague once who kept coming into my office 'to compare notes''. It always seemed to be when I had a pile of paperwork to get through at the end of the day and there were times when I didn't get home till after 7 at night. There were other times too and sometimes my only option was to put my coat on and tell her I had to go out....She was a great colleague otherwise, though...and the chats were really interesting....

She has complex issues which will not get better, could be early - mud stage Dementia or another mental health issue.
You say she has a big family, can you not talk to one of them (preferably with her standing there) and voice your concerns to them.
Or just tell her she's making your life a misery.

take up meditation and tell her you CANNOT be disturbed and you need silence. Also put a sign on your door. You could also do a silent home retreat and wear a label saying IN SILENCE

When the other person arrived I'd have said to Mrs Nice "Thanks for the chat. I'll have to throw you out now, sorry. See you tomorrow ."

No chance of moving, I'm afraid.
I did lol on my bed with the door locked all of this morning, so it was just 2 visits today, but they were extra long ones!
Someone I see rarely came to see how I am, and left after two hours, none the wiser, be cause neither of us got a word in edgeways!

Is it possible for you to move away? It sounds as if this woman's behaviour is detrimental to your quality of life.
There are some odd people everywhere not us ofcourse but you shouldn't have to put up with this person pestering you continually.

Yes, I have found an online service which delivers prescriptions now, as I didnt qualify for delivery at our main chemists.

So, that's one issue dealt with, at least.

And I no longer need sick notes from my gp, so there is another problem solved.

I've no idea how this can be resolved quickly without fall out but I think over time habits can be changed. Best of luck and you can always come on here to vent if you need to, can't you?

and very good neighbours too I'm sure!

No, she loves it here!
She has been offered a good few bungalows over the years, but "wouldn't touch them with a bargepole" (too small, dirty, etc)

re prescriptions, can you find a local chemist who delivers.
there is usually one in a locality who will do it, at least for disabled/ill people.
you just have to be less nice to and with that woman. be less available, which may mean locking back door for a while.
say little, be vague and shut her out. o.u.t.
good luck.

I completely understand you feeling bad about talking about her, but you must now put your current needs first. You might need to try a few things and see what works best, or at all, then review. Is there any chance/hope that she may move to different accommodation in the foreseeable future? You might want to try to encourage her by mentioning great places to live with lots of activities to occupy her every day
......

Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I've heard of electric blinds, too. Hmmmm...

MissAdventure

With regard to blinds, I don't have any, currently, and have spent the "blind money" that I had saved.

I pull the curtains, but that seems to drive her into a frenzy, then when she finally gets to see me, it is just to tell me what she has done/will be doing.

It has also put me off the idea I had of pristine white blinds at my back door (when I can save up again) because I can imagine her scrabbling and fighting her way through them to get in.

electrified tripwire with alarm sirens at your back step??

Another good idea, elegran.

Just wanted to say, my neighbour has a lot of input from health services and so on - mainly because she refuses to take her medication or watch what she eats (another area that she absolutely will not be guided on)
She is very mobile and very able to live independently, and does.
Her home is beautifully clean, as is she, and she really isn't some poor little old dear who struggles with life.

It is just this damn compulsion to offload she seems to have (she has a counsellor to speak to, if she chooses, as well)

I'm feeling like the lowest of the low now, speaking ill of her.

Stop That!

You're not blaming her and she is causing problems for you.

I agree with what the other posters have said in that she might have early stages of dementia. It sounds like she has some mental health issues of some sort.

In addition to the other suggestions, could you get a chain on your door so that when she knocks you can open it slightly but she can't barge in.

I am not sure whether Age UK can help with things like this. They have a handyperson service in some areas.

www.ageuk.org.uk/services/in-your-area/handyperson-services/

If you open the door using the chain you could say that you are not feeling well or it isn't convenient at the moment.

I hope that you can resolve this as it must be unbearable

I know someone who did that, and when the person told them she had been round, the hider's little boy said "We know, we saw you when we were behind the setter!"

A friend of mine had a neighbour like this. When she came round, she invariably shouted through the letterbox if knocking didn’t get a reply. ‘A’ used to hide behind the sofa until she had gone. One day I was there and I had to hide behind the sofa too! She had to put her hand over my mouth to stop me giggling!