Unusual living situation - does anyone know of a similar one?

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AussieGran59 I imagine that pinch-hit means that the OP helps out where needed.

Nanamar I wouldn't say that your living arrangement is not "normal" in that not a lot of people would live that way, but if it works for you, that's fine. Sounds like the little boy is being looked after by people who love him, so that's OK in my book.

I'd be more concerned about the future arrangements for you. You say that you all live together because you couldn't afford to have separate homes - so how is that going to work in the future , when DS and / or his ex gets a new partner ? And maybe they want to split and live separately ? Where would you fit in that scenario /

I assume that you contributed to the purchase of the house you are all living in , and that everything is legally documented. Otherwise you could end up losing out . See a lawyer and make sure that everything has been done legally - you need to protect your future .

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yes stella1949 is correct. Pinch-hit means to fill in when needed - I think it’s a sports term - maybe baseball?

Do you mean ‘pitch in’?

Nanamar

Yes stella1949 is correct. Pinch-hit means to fill in when needed - I think it’s a sports term - maybe baseball?

Yes, it’s a substitute batter in baseball. You live and learn!

DH was a sports junkie - another expression!

As long as your home on the property is in your name and the surrounding land is owned by you, then if either of the others want to sell up then you will be ok. But if they want to sell and you have to move as well then I do worry about that aspect.

Apart from that, you are doing what is right for your grandchild and that can’t be a bad thing.

We each “own” a third of the property; the way the title is written is that the property cannot be sold unless all three of us agree to do so OR the one who wants to sell buys out the other two so he or she becomes sole owner and can then sell it. I’m the only one of us who has the financial assets to buy the others out if it ever came to that. I just wondered if anyone knew of a similar situation involving exes who still live on the same premises in order to co-parent.

My DD and DGS live with me. Moves should be underway for her to get her own place, but our move from overseas back to the UK when she was pregnant made it hard for her to live independently at the time.

At the moment, it works-ish. I'd like them to move out, but also know it'll be a sad day when they do, because I'll miss living with DGS. I have no desire to live with him once he's a teenager though! I'll also relish the clean and tidy house once they're gone.

There are a myriad of ways to be a family. As long as everyone involved loves the child, it's a family, regardless of relationships or even being related. The idea of the nuclear family is not universal and based on DGS's school, isn't even the majority.

I expect that the variations in "unusual" living situations are as varied as they are in "usual" ones so in your place I think I'd just get on with today and not worry about several years hence.

I think it is actually very adult of you all to come to an arrangement that suits your DGS and yourselves, Nanamar. Oh that more people could put the children first in a divorce. It might be unconventional but that doesn't really matter. Prince Andrew and Fergie seem to have made it work as parents regardless of what the world thinks of them as people and their girls seem lovely as a result.

I know of a divorced couple who split the house in two (unsure of the details) but it works for them.
Sometimes they attend events together too.
It's worked for them for the last 20 years.

Gosh. I know lots of ‘unconventional’ families/living arrangements I was part of my one once😬

Whatever works.

I agree with others Nanamar if it works for you all then it's a good thing. Well done for putting your grandson at the heart of things.
Enjoy your life with your family now and I'm sure you will all sort things out when it becomes necessary.