The bah humbug thread...

Hate and detest Christmas,. More so this year,. My son whom I haven't seen for three years,and two GC are the other side of the country. And has' really spoken either. Do not know why.
I will therefore be spending Christmas day with my mum who has just turned 100 years old. Also hates Christmas. Oh , what joy !!!!
Roll on new year. Hope my son sees reason and reconnects. It is awful not knowing what I've said or done.

I think a recession is the best excuse ever for not doing Christmas this year.

Reluctantnanna, while I do like Christmas, I’ve always thoroughly enjoyed the week afterwards. Cheerful decorations still up, no shopping! - lots of lovely leftovers to eat up, just chilling* - and usually plenty of chocolates to scoff!
*well, before retiring I was p/t, but dh always had to take that week off anyway.

Just remembered.... my parents were strict about the twelve days of xmas as well. The tree went up on xmas eve and was taken down at Epiphany.

There was a certain simplicity which often seems to have been lost nowadays.

Anyway, I'm off out to bring some wood down from the top of the garden. It's jolly chilly today on the Boggy Brae!

Detached.

Also, if 'the flow' is "tawdry nonsense", which it mostly is, I'd rather not go with that flow. I choose not to.

I was brought up with a very religious Christmas and although the 'traditional' meal was done and we all got some presents (nothing excessive) and gave presents, this side of it was very much secondary.

Since I no longer am religious, xmas simply means nothing to me really. I'm not grumpy about it just uninterested in that particular 'flow'. Plenty of preferred flows of my own.

I'm looking forward to the week I have off afterwards more than the actual day. I have lovely kids and grandchildren but could do without it tbh. I dread the cost of Christmas and the expectation around the day. God I sound miserable!!

Reluctant, I don't think this sounds miserable at all. Prefering restful quietness is not miserable at all. We don't all have to be alike.

I’m with you on bah humbug. It’s too much extra work and money. I used to like it as a child and when my children were young but now I find it just emphasises the loss of loved ones, has an expectation of happiness which never materialises and is generally a big disappointment. I’m divorced with a different partner now and we go to our separate families over Christmas which doesn’t help. I like seeing my UK grandchildren having their presents but that in turn emphasises that my 3 other GC are in New Zealand and I never see them or my son. I hate a fuss and avoid emotional situations so Christmas is not for me at all.

Smileless2012

Love the card Shinamae even though I love Christmas.

Me too - I hardly ever find funny ones like that!

So many unhappy over Christmas - because of deaths in the family, family living too far, or an empty chair. Eventually we lose parents, siblings, spouse - so difficult. Some, losing a child - must be unbearable. Treat yourselves well.

MissAdventure

My daughter's certainly was.

😥 MissA. It’s just plain wrong, isn’t it? Your poor girl.

I do like Christmas, as I said earlier, but this year we have a number of painful issues in our family. I can see why it’s a difficult time for many people and I think if anyone doesn’t feel full of the festive spirit, that’s their right and I hope others would understand and be kind and gentle with those who are hurting.

My daughter hates Christmas and that always ruins it a bit for me. When she was younger she hated getting presents she didn't really want, hated being watched whilst she opened them, hated the fact that her Dad wasn't around when her step-siblings had theirs, hated the music, hated that her Birthday was a week before, created loudly and temperamentally over everything. Once she grew up she would be looking for trouble and estrange me over the festive period. It used to be horrible because I would be crying on the inside but trying to put on a happy occasion for the younger ones.
She got a little better after her children were born but can still find it difficult. On the upside, I have learned that it isn't something personal against me, she just can't handle her emotions and has Borderline Personality Disorder. For years, I was damned if I invited her because I know she hates Christmas and obviously hated her if I didn't invite her! We now have an agreement that she is automatically invited but I will understand if she can't face it. It is starting to work much better so maybe she won't always feel Bah Humbug but by the time she gets there, I'll probably be feeling it as it is such a hassle with all the expense, the wrapping, putting the decorations up, etc, etc!

I don't spend the day crying or anything, but it's not a big deal to me.

Yes it does help MissAdventure. I put a smile on for people but will very happy when it's over.

Misery loves company, so they say.
Does it help to realise how .any other people feel similarly?

I feel the same. I cried in M&S toilets last week as I felt an overwhelming sadness ( only popped in for some biscuits) My mum died 20yrs ago just after Christmas day and since then I've secretly dreaded it. It's the same every year. Cry most of November, get a grip and somehow get throughDecember it, but by 27th ready to move on. My children love Christmas ( adults) and I am blessed with two gc but don't know how many more years I can tolerate the bloody festive season.

I'm looking forward to the week I have off afterwards more than the actual day. I have lovely kids and grandchildren but could do
without it tbh. I dread the cost of Christmas and the expectation around the day. God I sound miserable!!

My daughter's certainly was.

Absolutely not! Just go with the flow and enjoy. Life is to short. X

* Not. overused.

No bah humbug here.
We are lucky to have a family that are close in feeling and distance.
We love getting together and gifts are bought for all, young and old including a few very dear friends.

Good food and social media and phones banned for a day or two. Christmas TV and family games are enjoyed and several family traditions upheld.
Everyone mucks so no one has all the work.
Credit cards are or overused.
Not smug but very , very grateful.

i did not like christmas as a child as i was the eldest i stayed up and helped wrap the presents for the younger children, while the drunk dad/stepdad lay in the corner, i made a big effort when my son was young but by the age of ten he came to me and said...can i just stay in bed till i wake up....do i need to get up early to open presents. he has a family of his own and makes a big deal for the 4 year old, they have invited me over for a relaxing day and a takeaway, but i am happy to stay on my own in my pjs and eat what i like. everyone should have the christmas they want and if that means running up the credit cards then that is up to them. whatever you are doing this christmas i hope you have a great time.

My ex-husband told me there was someone else on Christmas Day and left for good on New Year's Eve. It was such a shock I was like a zombie for weeks. Consequence is that as soon as the Christmas songs, trees and decorations go up my brain goes in to zombie mode again. However much I talk to myself to snap out of it, I can't avoid the triggers. So I am not Bah Humbug, just inconsolably sad.

As addition to my previous post, I do appreciate that Christmas can be a painful and difficult time for bereaved folk and those who are alone. xx

A very bad time for those who are struggling I had a child n intensive care at Christmas,my FILdied two weeks after our second DD was born at Christmas. Both my parents' birthdays were a few weeks before Christmas.
I am a firm believer in you doing what you want, whether it be traditional food, booze, or family traditions. I have had tonlies [Two only] when DDs were abroad.
please yourself and if you are missing someone do something to keep yourself as cheerful as possible but don't feel you have to join in.