Is it friendlier Up North?

I'm very sorry your friend ended up in an unfriendly community M0nica. However, 'The North' is a vast area!

I live in Oxfordshire and when I am out raking leaves at the front of the house, everyone who passes greets me, or I greet them, even though I know few of them personally. Our CH repair man saw me out and came over to enquire about the health of DH who had major heart surgery 18 months ago.

As I said, I am broadly in agreement with Aveline, that you make your own friendship, but as I said a very sociable friend, essentially died, ground down by the unfriendliness of Northerners.

M0nica

I want to agree with Aveline. It doesn't matter where you live, it is you that makes it friendly or not.

Except, I am remembering a friend, the sort of person who could find enough people to have a party with in an uninhabited desert. She went to live in Hull and was profoundly unhappy there as she found it almost impossible to make friends as she kept being rejected because she was a southerner - she wasn't, she was Irish, but her previous job had been in the south. She died prematurely 5 years after she moved there. She could not afford to move away from Hull. I am sure her death was hastened by her loneliness. I have not believed in northerners being friendly ever since.

I think it is both, Monica. And my Scottish friends all say Edinburgh is like the South- different to rest of Scotland, atmospherewise, and a bit too posh to be friendly to outsiders.

When I lived in London and Surrey, and went for walks, I'd always say hello to those I met, and they looked at me as though I was mad! Whereas when I discovered the Peak District and other parts of the Midlands, people smiled and responded. It felt nice.

Most definitely.I live in Surrey, when I visit my son up north it’s a totally different atmosphere.

I want to agree with Aveline. It doesn't matter where you live, it is you that makes it friendly or not.

Except, I am remembering a friend, the sort of person who could find enough people to have a party with in an uninhabited desert. She went to live in Hull and was profoundly unhappy there as she found it almost impossible to make friends as she kept being rejected because she was a southerner - she wasn't, she was Irish, but her previous job had been in the south. She died prematurely 5 years after she moved there. She could not afford to move away from Hull. I am sure her death was hastened by her loneliness. I have not believed in northerners being friendly ever since.

People are people wherever they live .

Why do some people insist on keeping this North / South divide going ?
What about all of us in the middle ? How would you label us ?

MacCavity2

*DaisyAlice and Merlotgran* that’s three of us now with a view of the Isle of Wight. I’ve lived in London and Kent but this is the friendliest place I have had the good luck to live. The New Forest and the sea. Wonderful.

I'm only a stones throw from that view as well, but from The Hill.
I'm someone who starts a conversation, never had a problem.

Some of my best chats are with taxi drivers! I often have great conversations at bus stops and on the bus. We know all our neighbours and frequently socialise with them. In Edinburgh.

Yes and no!
I lived in Edinburgh for 5 years and was only ever invited into 3 neighbours' houses. One was from Glasgow, one Yorkshire and one from Wales
My other neighbours were local and the explanation for their reserve was that nothing was ever spontaneous. Their house would be messy (clarty) so they would think you would be judging them

Most of my friends here in the Scottish Borders are incomers like myself

I agree that if you are friendly, other people will respond to you where ever you are. However when our son was living in London (we are from the northwest) and we were getting into a taxi after having a meal in a restaurant with him, I was surprised that the taxi driver said that he couldn't believe how friendly we were (I was apologising for keeping him waiting for a couple of minutes as our 3 year old granddaughter had decided to take her shoes off and her dad was trying to coax her back into them!). My husband was also chatting to him (asking him where he was from no less!) He was from Afghanistan and proudly showed us pictures of his children and wife. He said that usually any fares he picked up never spoke and rarely even thanked him. He even said he wouldn't take any money from us as he was so pleased to pick up such a friendly family (we of course insisted he take the money). Where we are from it is very usual to have a quick chat with taxi drivers and most certainly to thank them.

DaisyAlice and Merlotgran that’s three of us now with a view of the Isle of Wight. I’ve lived in London and Kent but this is the friendliest place I have had the good luck to live. The New Forest and the sea. Wonderful.

I think people in the South are less inclined to start a conversation with someone they don't know than people in the North. In the North you can find yourself chatting to complete strangers at a bus stop or in the doctor's waiting room (or you could when they were busy before Covid).

But there are friendly and kind people all over the country, it's just that they're more reserved in some places and, as Grandma70s says, it also depends on how friendly you are yourself.

DaisyAlice

Today's UK Loose Women programme decided that people are more friendly in the North than South. I live in the South of the South, lucky enough to have a view of The Isle of Wight. I'm always surprised that some media only consider that London is South. I find people very friendly where I live, as does my friend who lives in Leeds. Surely, there are friendly people everywhere.

I live in the same area, DaisyAlice having moved back to the south coast after living in East Anglia for fifty years.

Suffolk - friendly, Norfolk - even more so but North East Cambridgeshire? Well, they don’t call them Fen Tigers for nothing!

I’d forgotten how friendly everyone is down here. I wish I’d moved back years ago.

No. Friendly or unfriendly people are distributed evenly. And good or bad people. And clever or stupid people.
Sweeping generalisation is wrong imho.

No. People are just people. Anyway, I know loads of northerners (hello Mr A from Durham) who are in the south, and southerners who are in the north. Half my family is from Scotland, half from England. We have lived in the south for 40 years (20 years in London) and have friends from all over the country. SiL in Durham has some very nasty and aggressive neighbours. MiL in Durham once said her near neighbours were like family.

When my daughter went to stage school in London they said they always love the Yorkshire girls as they are very friendly and down to earth.
I find most places friendly but I’m friendly.

No of course not. People don’t change character just because they live in the south.

It takes me ages when I go walking with the dog because there is so much chat going on with everyone I meet.

Our neighbours are a really friendly group. A group of 5 couples plus a couple of widows meet up regularly for a get together. We go out to stuff - restaurant, “dos” etc or meet up in each other’s house. Our next meet up,is Christmas Eve - everyone to take some food. A jolly time is had by all.

I live within a stones throw of Brighton.

(But yes!) 🤭

Don't want to comment as got told off once before on a similar topic!

I was going to mention Leicester (and Leicestershire) as being very friendly. I originate from Derby which is really friendly too. Nottinghamshire is not so friendly.

We moved to Shrewsbury soon after we married and the first thing we were asked was 'Do you hunt?' Next question was 'Do you shoot?', Then 'Do you fish?'. As we did none of those things it was the end of the conversation.

I’ve lived as far north as Edinburgh and as far south as London, and some places in between. I think they are all much the same - the degree of ‘friendliness’ reflects your own. I found Edinburgh the least friendly, but I was very unhappy there for other reasons. I don’t think it was the fault of the people.

Agree with Aveline. If you’re friendly and smiley, cheerful and optimistic it comes back at you in spades.
Behaviour breeds behaviour.

We had great friends when we lived in London. But when we moved to the Potteries, we were amazed how friendly people were, and same later in the East Midlands. Never lived in the 'North' though.

But agree with Aveline.

Us Brummies are friendly

Having never lived any further south than Leicester all I can say is some parts of the North are more friendly than others.
The North East, including Newcastle and Durham, are the two most friendly places I have ever lived or worked even my home county.
Other parts of the North are suspicious until they know you and then they can be friendly.
I think the Geordies and I use that as an inclusive word taught me to laugh at myself, joke about awful things to keep going, were welcoming and always be willing to chat in a shop a queue or a bus stop.
Having said that both my DDs live in the South now and have lots of good friends, so I think if you approach people with an open attitude they are more likely to be friendly with you.
My attitude to people certainly changed after living there.
I can't speak for the rest of the country but when visiting Wales, Scotland and Ireland I have found the people helpful and chatty even though I was called a BRIT in Southern Ireland and refused service at the Post Office some years ago.