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Not replying to texts

(34 Posts)
AussieGran59 Fri 30-Dec-22 00:12:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chestnut Fri 30-Dec-22 00:23:03

We have a daughter who just never replies, and her sister and both parents are often angry at being ignored. We will have to speak to her about it. After all, it is so quick and easy, it really doesn't take any time at all, so there's no excuse. Sometimes we are waiting days or more for a reply to an actual question we need answered!

AussieGran59 Fri 30-Dec-22 00:37:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AussieGran59 Fri 30-Dec-22 06:04:57

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

grandMattie Fri 30-Dec-22 06:15:32

Ditto! Sad though.

Ohmother Fri 30-Dec-22 06:18:26

I have come to the realisation that looking at and responding to texts is not a priority for some and there’s nothing that can be done about it except to have lots of patience. Sometimes I slip and resend the same message again as a reminder.

BlueBalou Fri 30-Dec-22 06:21:28

Same here too ☹️

Allsorts Fri 30-Dec-22 06:29:30

Texts have always been answered, even by gc. Perhaps if you see each other often the need to respond isn’t there.
We have gained a lot by technology but give me a real conversation any day, I much prefer the landline which my c don’t have.. When people are working and bringing up their families it would be nice to speak to them if it’s not possible to see them.

NanKate Fri 30-Dec-22 06:29:56

My friend often waits weeks for a reply to say an invitation. Her daughter even works in IT so there is no excuse, just being bl**dy rude imo.

ShazzaKanazza Fri 30-Dec-22 06:38:10

I always reply to texts but sometimes I will quickly read one and then think when I sit down I will reply but then forget but always apologise when I do. I also type a message but then leave it forgetting to press send and again apologising profusely for the late reply.

Lexisgranny Fri 30-Dec-22 06:38:42

The texts I receive from my grandchildren can be summed up easily, as:
Thank you
Yes thank you
No thank you
Yes
No

I suppose I must be content with that!

notgran Fri 30-Dec-22 06:40:35

I have an In Law who does this. I hadn't realised it was so common a phenomena. The rest of the family think it is quite amusing and I think she imagines she is controlling us somehow (she isn't). Funnily enough when we telephone her for a chat she talks your head off and will often refer to how lovely pics were, that we have sent her or how good, for example, the day out we have suggested sounds but doesn't mention that she hadn't responded or replied to a question. We don't chase up the answer to the questions. She rarely telephones us but sounds delighted when we ring her. It is both rude and weird which describes part of her personality. grin

Grammaretto Fri 30-Dec-22 06:45:14

My DD doesn't often reply to my infrequent texts either AussieGran.
Or if she does it's a one word yes or no. There's seldom a conversation. Sometimes she sends a photo which I like.
She phones me and expects me to answer. ofcourse grin

Sparklefizz Fri 30-Dec-22 07:09:56

I text my son maybe once very 10 days or so - often he doesn't reply, so I send it again. It's very annoying. My daughter replies as soon as she can.

Oldest granddaughter and grandson reply very quickly. Middle granddaughter will reply after a day or so.

I have just had to get used to it.

Casdon Fri 30-Dec-22 07:18:10

I’m guilty. My immediate family all use Messenger rather than texts, which is on both my phone and my iPad. I prefer the iPad, so I can sometimes go days without checking my phone if I’m not out much, and I forget all about texts only being accessible via the phone. Hands up.

Sago Fri 30-Dec-22 08:44:03

I often find text messages intrusive, I will read them when I’m ready, sometimes they don’t warrant a response.

crazyH Fri 30-Dec-22 08:59:49

Texts are so much easier and less intrusive than phoning. The recipient can reply at his/her leisure. I rarely phone because they are all very busy. Actually, I get a faster reply if I text the girls in the family, except my teenage grand daughter who hardly checks her WhatsApp. It’s all instagram etc. As long as they’re ok, that’s all that matters..

Wyllow3 Fri 30-Dec-22 09:02:59

No problems with family here, we WhatsApp quite a bit and its good to send and get photos. But I don't see them much due to distance.

Also - its nice to reply when one wants to chatty ones.

I get tired easily and also Ds and DiL are so busy that phone calls are rare but when we do phone its with video which is nice.

However....my grandchildren aren't at a texting age yet, so we'll see.

Gingster Fri 30-Dec-22 09:06:36

My eldest gd who is at Uni, waits days before she replies. She is the same with her mum and other relations. I text her a couple of times a week just to let her know we are thinking of her,

I always message straight back to anyone, otherwise I could forget. It only takes a few seconds.

Dickens Fri 30-Dec-22 09:27:54

Sago

I often find text messages intrusive, I will read them when I’m ready, sometimes they don’t warrant a response.

Agree.

Text messages are a good way to keep in touch but IMO often over-used.

The texter will send you a message at their convenience - but it's not necessarily received at yours.

I've had to make it clear to my friends that I will always answer their messages, but that it might take a few days to do so. Unless of course it's an urgent message. I have to micro-manage virtually every aspect of my disabled partner's life at the same time as dealing with my own complex health problems and the minutiae of everyday life. Sometimes, I don't even have time to eat and have to do it while I'm on the go - no time to sit down, grab a bite, and check my messages! But, they do understand.

I could of course spend less time on GN, but I often dip into it when I'm "held in a queue and will be answered as soon as an operator is free" mode grin.

Septimia Fri 30-Dec-22 09:31:59

I text (or email) when I think that the person I'm contacting might be busy and unable to respond to a phone call. They can reply when it's convenient. I do expect a reply at some point, though, preferably fairly soon!

Like others, my GD's texts usually extend to "thank you"...

kircubbin2000 Fri 30-Dec-22 09:34:32

Just realised I didn't have a proper conversation with my daughter when she was home at Christmas. Every time I went to speak one of the kids needed something and off she went. She rings home sometimes but again she is calling to the children every few minutes. If I miss her call I ring back immediately and it goes straight to voicemail.

henetha Fri 30-Dec-22 10:20:27

We're all on whatsapp and are pretty good at replying. And at least we know if they have read it because of the ticks turning blue. With texting we simply don't know if it's even been read.

Yammy Fri 30-Dec-22 10:34:27

Same here Aussie gran from very young SIL who asks to facetime, you sit in all afternoon and she never does. BIL her husband chooses the most inconvenient time he can think of to face time, like when you have family and he knows you will be eating.
He tried it on Christmas morning when we were at our DD, he was lonely his children to his first wife had gone to her for Christmas. For the first time ever DH cut him short and wished him a Merry Christmas.

Theexwife Fri 30-Dec-22 11:34:36

I am guilty of not answering texts, they are the ones that say ‘how are you’ or ‘how did your outing go’. These are txts that if answered will turn into a text conversation or as in the case of my mother, she will stop texting and phone and saying she would rather talk than text.

I have not answered the text because I am busy or with somebody, you would not answer a phone call if busy so why answer a text. I tend to read the text and plan to answer later but do sometimes forget or the reply would be too late.

Just because people now can be contacted day or night it doesn’t mean that you should expect them to be able to answer or want to answer.