I need a hug…

Big hug.

what someone above said - you and friend can make it good, but atm it all hurt and scared you so much that her going on was just more upsetting.
Mostly its better to listen and sympathise, and she went on too long....do hug each other next time, you have NOT done anything dreadful.

Sorry to hear you got up in a scam, they are getting so clever, any of us could be caught out. Big hug coming your way.

A big hug from me, too. 💐

Not long ago I read in the Sunday Times a piece by a financial journalist - of all people! who’d been scammed.

If someone like that can fall for one….
Must say I salute her salute her for going public with it.

JaneJudge

If it makes you feel any better, someone cloned my card and I also ignored warnings from the bank. The reason I did was because I was receiving text messages from the scammers and text messages from the bank which contained the same information and I thought it was a hoax. When I rang the bank I was put directly through to their fraud team who asked me why I'd been ignoring messages from them so I explained what had happened and they said it is a sophisticated scam that makes you believe it isn't real and by the time you have realised it is a scam they have already started to take money. Luckily it was dealt with in time but it does leave you feeling vulnerable, I completely understand that.

A hug from me too

Another 'if it makes you feel better' is from me.

We haven't been scammed just once.

Twice on one Latvian holiday. Once through the Bank (a sophisticated country-wide scam). Once with credit card scam. And once in SouthAmerica. We like to spread the fun around.

We're NOT stupid -- and we end up feeling very vulnerable.

We or the banks have always recovered our funds.

Doodle

Hug from me too.
I may well have responded in the same way as your friend. Sometimes it’s hard to understand what is the best way to respond to someone who is hurt and upset. If you ignore the issue and talk round it do they think you are uncaring and making light of the issue. If you do talk about it you’re at risk of saying the wrong thing and upsetting them like your friend has to you.
It it were me I would text her and say sorry for cutting her off you are still feeling a bit raw and couldn’t cope with thinking about it. Hope you didn’t upset her. That might make both of you feel better. I doubt she meant to upset you.

Totally agree Doodle - she meant well, but it wouldn't be good to lose a friendship over this.

Hug from me too.
I may well have responded in the same way as your friend. Sometimes it’s hard to understand what is the best way to respond to someone who is hurt and upset. If you ignore the issue and talk round it do they think you are uncaring and making light of the issue. If you do talk about it you’re at risk of saying the wrong thing and upsetting them like your friend has to you.
It it were me I would text her and say sorry for cutting her off you are still feeling a bit raw and couldn’t cope with thinking about it. Hope you didn’t upset her. That might make both of you feel better. I doubt she meant to upset you.

PS I am sure your friend was just trying to be supportive and just misjudged and most probably feels bad, if she is a good friend

If it makes you feel any better, someone cloned my card and I also ignored warnings from the bank. The reason I did was because I was receiving text messages from the scammers and text messages from the bank which contained the same information and I thought it was a hoax. When I rang the bank I was put directly through to their fraud team who asked me why I'd been ignoring messages from them so I explained what had happened and they said it is a sophisticated scam that makes you believe it isn't real and by the time you have realised it is a scam they have already started to take money. Luckily it was dealt with in time but it does leave you feeling vulnerable, I completely understand that.

A hug from me too

Keep posting, Secondwind. Lots of support here.

Thank you all so much. I really appreciate your kindness and warm thoughts.
The bank have been very supportive and I am grateful for that, too.

I’ve just read the thread and I’m sending you a big hug too. I think we could all be scammed… as you say, the wrong moment, a coincidence that makes you drop your doubts. These people are despicable and horribly clever.
I’m sure your friend will understand too.

I’m so sorry you’ve had this happen secondwind. Scammers are very believable and far more experienced than we are at combatting them. Please don’t continue blaming yourself, time to be kind. A warm hug from me and a hope you can sleep tonight.

What a horrible thing to have happened to you, especially if you don’t think there’s any chance of getting your money back. I hope it wasn’t a large sun. Dreadful.

It’s so good that people like you are willing to admit that you’ve been a victim of a scam, because that potentially can help others to be more on their guard, particularly in terms of listening if our bank warns us about a transaction we are about to make.
Banks are much more on the ball now about these dreadful scams and do their best to protect their customers, but ultimately I guess, if a customer absolutely insists that a payment goes through, the bank has to honour that.

Thank you for sharing your entirely natural reactions. We are all vulnerable and it can help us to read real life and hard won experience. We all feel daft at times for making ‘silly mistakes’ - breaking a glass, forgetting a name, tripping, and these days getting taken in by sneaky scams - it’s just human.

Lovely messages above. Don’t blame yourself and be pleased you’re now taking steps to recover your confidence and some money.

and hug

🤗🤗🤗 from me too.

I think the financial ombudsman is good advice.I was told that too.
Hope you are successful getting your money back.
Barbarax

Thank you again, everyone. It’s so kind of you all.

I genuinely thought I would never fall for a scam, but a the circumstances and a coincidence caught me completely off guard.

Have a hug, Secondwind. 🤗

Here’s a big 🤗

Sending love and hugs xxx

and tell your friend that all you need is a hug...

I was scammed during the pandemic. I felt a fool and lost confidence. Action fraud were useless. No response from them. The best people to talk to are to ring the financial ombudsman. They were brilliant. I told them my story. They went to the banks involved to investigate it. Eventually I got all my money back. Please send me a private message if you want any further detail but please ring the financial ombudsman . Take care and remember it can happen to anyone.

Sending you a big squeeeeeeezy hug. There but for the grace go a lot of us. ((((((((Hug)))))))))

Please don't beat yourself up! Big hug from me too.

Sending you a massive virtual HUG Secondwind and hope you get something back in the future, bringing this to our attention will make us all aware of these horrible scammers and to take massive care in the future.