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Activities for someone with depression

(38 Posts)
susanverity Sat 11-Feb-23 09:48:11

My 83 year old mum has just got out of hospital after ten months in a psychiatric ward due to depression. I'm keen to keep her occupied but she keeps saying no to most things. Anyone got any suggestions of things to keep her busy?
Thanks very much

Anniebach Sat 11-Feb-23 09:54:30

Does your Mum live with you or on her own ?

What were here interests before the depression ?

susanverity Sat 11-Feb-23 09:56:29

She lives with my Dad who is 90. Music was a big passion but she keeps saying she's not good enough. We've have played recorder duets a couple of times and I keep saying to Dad to put Classic FM on as much as possible.

Anniebach Sat 11-Feb-23 10:01:26

Can your mum play keyboards?

Redhead56 Sat 11-Feb-23 10:05:03

Take her for a drive somewhere and take a little picnic just sitting and observing. If she isn’t very mobile or in a wheel chair take her to the park to feed the birds and ducks.
Sometimes just getting out and seeing other people lifts the spirits.
When my MIL was diagnosed with terminal cancer she slumped into deep depression. It was a struggle as she was a heavy weight but I took her out in her wheel chair.
She did enjoy it we would go to the sweet shop and she would get a lolly ice it was the only thing she could eat by then. It was lovely to see her mood lift even only for a brief time which I still smile about we were very close.

tanith Sat 11-Feb-23 10:09:35

I don’t know if it’s possible but just being outside would lift my mil mood when in her 90s. I would sit her outside where she could hear the birds and feel the breeze see the sky and feel the sun she was always lifted by it.

Esmay Sat 11-Feb-23 10:09:52

Poor lady .
I've also experienced this with elderly parents .
It's really hard to cope with .

Music as suggested .
Swimming was very successful .
Walking was too .

We had some very elderly ladies at our belly dance group classes .
They loved it !
Any dancing is great .

I used to teach art to some ladies aged 80 plus at their coffee mornings /afternoon teas .

Good luck .

Germanshepherdsmum Sat 11-Feb-23 10:12:44

I agree that getting outside is very helpful. Depression can make it difficult to concentrate sufficiently to read a book, but a puzzle such as a crossword can hook you in and solving it gives a sense of achievement. A jigsaw can also be very absorbing.

silverlining48 Sat 11-Feb-23 10:27:55

If your mum has only just been discharged after so long she may not be up to doing too much straight away.
Don’t rush things, she has been in a very difficult environment and needs time. Take her outside if it’s not too cold for short periods or perhaps in the car as a start.
My mum was in a psychiatric unit for 3 or 4 months so I do understand.
Hope your mum starts to feel better soon.

Patsy70 Sat 11-Feb-23 10:53:06

Being outside certainly lifts the spirits, especially now Spring is on its way. Even just sitting by the window, watching birds feeding and the bulbs and plants emerging.

Chardy Sat 11-Feb-23 10:59:55

Can you take her somewhere she can sit and look? I live near the sea, so I'm going to say sitting watching the sea (from the pier?). A little inland are some fabulous valley views with viewing spots (Google 'wow spots near me' or 'lookout points'?) where you can see for miles. They're even better with a telescope or binoculars.

hollysteers Sat 11-Feb-23 11:32:10

Do you think she might enjoy colouring in an adult colouring book.? Some of them are not childlike at all, quite complicated.
Has she got an IPad? That certainly has lots to interest anyone.

Aveline Sat 11-Feb-23 11:35:23

I second getting outside in nature. There's something wonderfully therapeutic about it. If she's not that mobile how about a wee picnic in the car at some beauty spot?
Good luck though. I know it is very difficult.

JaneJudge Sat 11-Feb-23 11:37:20

gardening?

Damdee Sat 11-Feb-23 12:01:38

Could she write her life story - or anecdotes or memories from her life. Or dictate to you - bit by bit. My parents used to love talking about old times.

silverlining48 Sat 11-Feb-23 12:03:32

That’s a nice idea, you can chat and maybe record what she says and write it up if she isn’t able to.

JenniferEccles Sat 11-Feb-23 12:12:26

Do you think she might enjoy sorting through old photos from when you were young?
Unless she has already done it, maybe picking her favourites to put in an album. I think a lot of folk your mum’s age would have loads of photographs, some of her own parents and siblings perhaps.

Looking through old pictures could perhaps take her back to happier times when she was a young mum.

dogsmother Sat 11-Feb-23 12:13:07

Perhaps plain paper and pencils even, perhaps she has a little bit of an artistic flair and could draw?

pascal30 Sat 11-Feb-23 12:13:53

I wonder if she would enjoy a hand massage with lovely essential oils? I think the RVS might have volunteers,or maybe an aromatherapist would visit. Old people so rarely get touched

Caleo Sat 11-Feb-23 12:18:30

I once had a friend who was extremely depressed and what made him laugh and joke was when I gave him a bath, especially care of the feet.

pascal30 Sat 11-Feb-23 12:21:45

Also get maybe go to a lovely spot that she used to enjoy going to and bring a photograph album so she can remember good memories and friends...

Caleo Sat 11-Feb-23 12:22:22

PS my friend had actual clinical bipolar depression. He also liked my dog and had never before lived with an animal. He also enjoyed conversations about his own great interest.

Germanshepherdsmum Sat 11-Feb-23 12:25:39

We are all different, but my own experience of depression is that looking at old photos isn’t helpful - they are a sad reminder of times long past, those happy highways where we went and can never go again …

Caleo Sat 11-Feb-23 12:35:31

I couldn't agree more GSM. Nostalgia leads to discontent.

Germanshepherdsmum Sat 11-Feb-23 12:46:51

Glad I’m not alone Caleo!