An apple for the teacher.

I believe parents often club together nowadays to buy a more expensive gift such as those mentioned.

DS is a primary school teacher. What he most appreciates receiving is home made cards from the pupils and letters of appreciation from the parents. Boxes of chocolates, bottles of wine and cycling gloves are nice but pretty meaningless.

I once had a box of allotment grown vegetables as an end of year gift from a family. What a lovely present, especially as I knew the child that I taught had been involved in the creation of it; I was less enamoured of a gift from one mum of a framed photograph of her son..

Before I retired, we were instructed to refuse any gift worth over £10. It was never an issue really, as I taught in a secondary school, and gifts weren't as common. I did receive some lovely gifts from my tutor class when I retired. One girl, who I never taught but had dealings with in my role as second in command, when she heard I was retiring, rushed to the nearest shop and bought me a box of sweets. That gift meant a huge amount to me because she had very little herself.

DH received a new set of golf clubs once!

Classes club together and donations can add up to anywhere 300 and 500

The class rep who organises this and sends out notices through the year typically gets a gift too made from donations adding up to between 100 and 150...

It can be quite draining for parents with multiple children and quite overwhelming as a TA (although very appreciated).

It's got me thinking about the end of year now, I'm going to miss them so much

Juliet27

I believe parents often club together nowadays to buy a more expensive gift such as those mentioned.

Yes, like John Lewis vouchers. It makes sense. Plus a personal little homemade item if the child wants to.

Sorry for seeming a Scrooge but I think it should be banned it became a competition when my grandkids were in primary with mothers trying to out do others with really expensive presents luckily my daughter didn’t play into it and got just a small something
It’s like tipping unless the culture is to do it to everyone who does anything for you then I think it’s unfair
Nurses aren’t allowed to receive gifts (unless it’s changed recently) so why teachers ?

Years ago, when I left , I was expecting our first child and those kids, rough as guts, gave me lovely hand knitted baby clothes and little things for the newborn. It brought tears to my eyes.

I’m still working and I don’t ‘expect’ to receive a gift just for doing my job. A verbal thank you is polite, a card very welcome and IF a parent chooses to offer a small gift I accept with profuse thanks. I certainly wouldn’t look for an expensive experience gift and I’ve never been offered anything like that in 25 years of teaching.

I have no idea why this is permitted in education. My background is social care, there were very good reasons why there were strict guidelines around individual gifts from families.

nanna8

Years ago, when I left , I was expecting our first child and those kids, rough as guts, gave me lovely hand knitted baby clothes and little things for the newborn. It brought tears to my eyes.

I got knitted things for my baby when I left on maternity leave. The most poignant was in a very poor area I got a half-eaten toffee bar. The mum explained the child had saved their pocket money for it and couldn't resist on the way to school.
The other was many years ago after a very tough teaching practice the class had a whip around and I got a box of Maltesers. The teacher said she had collected more for me than all the black babies in an African orphanage they supported.
I did give a donation to their African collection.
Expensive presents mean nothing it's the little things that touch. The homemade card or biscuits or bubble bath that has been decanted into a smaller bottle. It has all gone too far.
I wonder how parents will feel this year after all the strikes and having to take days off themselves and the food banks.

I liked the presents that the children had chosen themselves because they spotted the things I liked: cats, book tokens, some kitchen utensils, a jar of cherries 'you like eating them', chocolate, likewise, coffee and coffee mugs, pens, 'you lose them', and desk tidy (nuff said). I still have a collection of sea-washed pieces of glass collected from the beach, because 'green is your favourite colour'.

It made me realise how closely they observe you.

With regard to presents, I and many other teachers, TAs and dinner ladies also gave the children a small gift each at Christmas, Easter and the end of term. I used to bake small cakes and biscuits, hence the 'you like cooking'.

Galaxy

I have no idea why this is permitted in education. My background is social care, there were very good reasons why there were strict guidelines around individual gifts from families.

Absolutely.

No state school worth attending would permit lavish gifts and would make it clear that a thank you (written or verbal) would be the most appreciated thing.

Certainly not an organised collection that people feel obliged to contribute to😱😱😱

The Head and Governors should have put a stop to that as soon as it was mooted.

Private schools are probably different.

Private schools are probably different.
Some independent schools hold a register where a teacher has to declare any gift from a parent over a certain amount. It's all to do with being seen as bribery.

Yes same in social care, we were allowed gifts for the childrens home so if the parents gave a box of chocolates we would share it within the home but we couldnt take gifts to our own homes if you see what I mean.

Good for them.

Every school should have a policy that makes it clear that gifts are not expected and that certainly there will be no “organised” collection.

Parental mafia😱 with teacher approval 😱😱😱😱😱

Bella23

nanna8

Years ago, when I left , I was expecting our first child and those kids, rough as guts, gave me lovely hand knitted baby clothes and little things for the newborn. It brought tears to my eyes.

I got knitted things for my baby when I left on maternity leave. The most poignant was in a very poor area I got a half-eaten toffee bar. The mum explained the child had saved their pocket money for it and couldn't resist on the way to school.
The other was many years ago after a very tough teaching practice the class had a whip around and I got a box of Maltesers. The teacher said she had collected more for me than all the black babies in an African orphanage they supported.
I did give a donation to their African collection.
Expensive presents mean nothing it's the little things that touch. The homemade card or biscuits or bubble bath that has been decanted into a smaller bottle. It has all gone too far.
I wonder how parents will feel this year after all the strikes and having to take days off themselves and the food banks.

Loved all this as you have said just how I felt when I was teaching. I remember being so touched when the parents of a child I taught came into the classroom because they”wanted to shake my hand”. Then those letters of thanks from parents and those little presents which I still have such as vases, ornaments etc. The children are grown up but memories are so precious.

A small time gift is quite enough! This can become a competition between parents, expensive gifts are ridiculous and out of the question for most parents. An apple for the teacher should suffice! I am sure the majority of teaches bare embarrassed when given very expensive gifts. They are doing their job - teaching!!

It really does incense some people, doesn't it.
My book group gives a yearly gift to the Librarian; I gave a gift to the first-aider in Superdrug when I fell over and broke my arm; I gave gifts to my personal trainer; gifts to the keep-fit lady. , gifts to tour OU tutor, etc etc.
The point is, my choice.
I think you miss the point that it is the pupils want to give gifts; no-one is made to, and plenty of children don't.
I have never worked in a school where there were organised class collections, although I did get a joint gift, and contributed to many others when I returned, for pregnancy.

No state school worth attending would permit lavish gifts and would make it clear that a thank you (written or verbal) would be the most appreciated thing.

When staff leave, there is often a collection and this can become a decent amount of money. Our Headmaster was treated to a helicopter flight over the area he had taught for many years. I don't see the end of term gifts as being any different.
I think it would be better if vouchers were given because these could be donated to the school to buy things for the classroom to buy things to make the teacher's life better. I don't think a school allowing gifts is a reflection of whether a school is worth attending or not. Gifts are voluntary and not expected.

Lathyrus 'with teacher approval.' what on earth do you mean by that? I have never rejected a gift given to me by a child or a parent, come to that. It would be rude to do so. Pupils would often give me a cake they had made in home economics. They were very proud of their baking and for some, had no-one at home who was interested. I always accepted in the manner it had been given. Should I have refused that too, hurting their feelings? I gave small thank you gifts to my children's teachers when they were at primary school. I give thank you gifts to the pharmacy, doctor's surgery and library at Christmas. This is turning into a bash the teachers thread.

The problem is voluntary seems to have become compulsory and for quite significant sums. That’s when the school had to step in.

And if it doesn’t, if it tacitly promote that pressure on parents, we’ll that’s a school I wouldn’t want to send children to or to work in. But those are my values.
People will send children to schools that reflect their own values if they have a choice and teachers seeking employment likewise.

Retirement gifts are a bit different I think but even then it shouldn’t be. “Rep” going round asking each parent for a contribution.

A gift is just that -a gift.

Not a “bash the teacher” at all.

We don’t just teach values we inculcate them. A word not much longer used.

What do we inculcate when a “rep” goes round pressuring each parent into a “gift” and we as teachers accept that?