Phone mum (she knows everything)

My medic Dd works in A&E and she wishes people would phone their mums more often. She has to deal with so many minor conditions that she reckons I’d be able to treat with home remedies. And I’m not a nurse or anything so I don’t have specialist knowledge! She asks me first for health advice for herself even though she’s fully trained.

My son last week ‘is a zucchini the same as a courgette’ 🙂

I’ve had several from my daughter from all over the world but this one seriously inconvenienced me.
We were driving from Spain to our house in Bulgaria.
We were driving through Germany when I got a call to say I was needed back in the uk.
Booked a flight. OH dropping me off at airport when I received another call from daughter asking if I’d seen the news, what, no I hadn’t.
A volcano had erupted in Iceland. All flights were cancelled.
As I had to get back to the uk the only option was to find a station and get to the Eurostar terminal in France where the world and his wife were also going 😱

Son no.1 rang from a police station one evening to say he had been arrested for Burglary on the night before he was due to enrol for Uni. My husband donned his fire uniform and drove to the police station. DS had gone out from drinks with his new flat mates and had become separated from them. On the way home, being very drunk, he had twisted his ankle and become lost. He saw the door of a building open and went inside to see if he could find anyone to help him. When he couldn't, he lay down and went to sleep. When he woke up, he found he was locked in so rang his Mum to ask what to do. She told him to find a fire exit and go home. The next night he was arrested because he had gone into an open door which was only open because a burglary was taking place and thieves had made off with a load of computers. DS had left his wallet and jacket behind so the police had put 2 and 2 together to make 5. Fortunately before he left the building he'd called a taxi so the driver was able to confirm that he was empty handed.
It was the first time we realised we were no longer in a position to speak for our son as he was over 18. We felt so helpless whilst they sorted it out but we knew he didn't have it in him to burgal anybody.

My worst one was when my, then 18 year old, DD called me at 2.30am to tell me that she's had an accident in her car. She'd only been driving about 3 months. She was totally hysterical and I struggled to understand where she was, what exactly had happened, and if she, or anyone else, was hurt. It turned out she'd taken a country bend too fast, had hit some gravel on the roadside and lost control. The car rolled 3 times before stopping on its roof! Luckily, she was only very slightly injured; a bit of gravel rash on her right arm as the side window had smashed as the car rolled and her arm had caught the tarmac briefly. I still shudder to think what could have happened if it had actually been caught outside the car. That's the worst thing she's ever called me up for. She's now a late 30's mother of 3 and she still calls me up to ask for help with any problem she might have; writing official letters, dealing with parking tickets(!), wanting to know how to hang a shelf... During a long and drawn out custody battle for her middle child, I must have spent weeks typing letters and filing out forms! We don't get on very well, never really have, she's always been a daddy's girl (he can do no wrong, I'm the devil incarnate), but it's still always me she calls when she needs help, and I'm always happy to do so.

My oldest son once called long distance, worried, to ask me if having blue bowel movements means he has an infection. After a few questions I worked out that it was because he'd been subsisting on ramen noodles and boxes of some kind of cheap cereal with tons of blue sugary thingies in it.

Younger son, first weekend in student digs. A phone call asking how to get the smell of vomit out of the carpet.

I used to live 1/2 a mile from my Mum and would often call with...'Mum, silly question' and she always knew the answer.

When we moved 120 miles to help care for my MinL I would ask my FinL instead. A few months later Mum wistfully said she missed her 'silly question calls', so I made a point of doing them until she died - or saved them for when I cared for her in her final years. Even a few days before she died, she brightened and smiled when I asked my silly question about something in her house...she knew the answer too

My son rang me from school after sitting an exam to say his sight was going. Black patches.
Don't worry I said calmly think you are having a visual migraine which I suffer from.
But go and see Matron.
Can't believe how nonchalant I was about it now.

I had a panic stricken phone call from DD when her husband had left the stairgate open and her 10 month old had fallen down the stairs. Over the phone I told her that no one who was screaming that loud had done any serious damage and certainly didn't sound brain damaged. A quick trip with her to the doctor proved me right. He wasn't even bruised, just frightened. She also rang when he had been screaming all morning for ne apparent reason. Nothing seemed to hurt when he was touched so I suggested it might be an ear infection. Another trip to the doctor, who prodded him all over and then looked in his ears and diagnosed a nasty infection. "That's what Mum said" said my daughter "That's why we have grannies" said the doctor.

I had this yesterday when DS 32 rang to say his flight from Valencia had been cancelled due to the ATC problems. EasyJet didn’t have any availability until Sunday and should he use another airline and travel via a European county? Which he is now doing .
My worst was when DD started uni and her friend phoned me to say Dds drink had been spiked and what should she do. I told her to take dd to hospital where they tested her and she’d been given Rohypnol the date rape drug

Just walking in the door after I returned home on the train having been helping DD1 with my first GC and the phone rang. "Mum I have fed him - what do I do now?!"

Same DD (about 200 miles away) rang about the man who had been stalking her, starting with feeling her up on a bus several weeks before - he had been arrested the day before after she was able to contact the police to say he was following her again. She told me that the police had just rung to say they had released him as it was "a first offence." I was beyond angry - they left her vulnerable again after weeks of worry. I cannot tell you how my heart sank.

Every single time my son (aged 34) goes away I dread the phone call. Years ago on a Uni placement in New York he rang hysterical saying he was lost, I said just jump in a yellow cab he said he couldn’t see any cars ( what - in New York). He did eventually find his way back to lodgings.
He has lost his money in Thailand, his contact lenses in Morocco, twisted his knee in Cambodia, his friend rang me (drunk) one night to say he was lost in Tenerife and not answering phone, he lost the key to an Airbnb in Los Angeles.
He also worked 2 years on cruise ships, initially it was one disaster after another I dreaded all the calls.
My daughter once rang me at work and said don’t panic but her boyfriend had skidded the car , swerved off the road and imbedded car into front of house, she said don’t worry ambulance is on the way. Arghhh.
Finally the worst one was on a hot July weekend me and DH were having a few days in York. Just arrived when hysterical daughter phoned to say her boyfriend was in an explosion at an electricity sub station and he was on his way to QE hospital in Birmingham. We raced the 200 miles home to support her. He had absolutely amazing treatment by army medics at the burns unit at QE hospital. Today you would hardly know he was in an accident.

I got a phone call one Sunday lunchtime asking how to roast potatoes as he wanted to do lunch for the student house. I described in detail how I did them, best bit was I did not know him from Adam he had clearly rung a wrong number but was so concerned about getting it right that he didn't realise.