Feeling the passing of time

Years ago an aunt told me she couldn't bear to look at old family photos. And I thought how odd that was.

These days I feel the same. They leave me feeling so sad. I am in my 70s and now older than some of the relations pictured. At 56 you are nowhere near old! Fashions worn in the past and hairstyles made people look much older than they were.

I agree that looking through old photos can make you feel mournful, remembering your past life and thinking of happy youthful days which are now long gone. But I think their value is more for future generations, who will look at them in amazement. Did grandma actually look like that, long blonde hair and a mini skirt?

I really think that photos and videos come into their own with the passing of time, and the longer the better. Therefore keep your photos safely and treasure them. Most importantly, write on the back names, dates and places otherwise in the future you will be 'strangers in a box'. I have lots of photos of ancestors from 50-150 years ago and they are fascinating, but one album turned up full of beautiful Victorian family photos and no-one had a clue who most of them were which is really sad.

I think we often don't recognise how old we are, you often hear older people saying they don't want to go somewhere because it is full of old people, or that they look so much older in photos. When it is often the case that if you sit in a group of older people you will blend in as one of them to an outsider looking in.

When you look at your face in a mirror you see no change in what you saw yesterday whereas in a photo you are seeing yourself as others do.

I have only about a dozen photos of myself as a child and teenager. All the family photos were in albums and then in a huge plastic box at my late Mum’s house.

About a year before she died Mum asked me to sort out the whole box as there were a load of loose ones that needed sorting out. I brought them all back to mine and did just that. She had said if there were any I wanted I was to take them but I felt they were hers and it was a bit final. So I didn’t.

Sadly a family member let themselves into Mum’s house when she was in hospital and stole the whole lot plus her emergency cash and all her diaries which had been left to me in her Will.

The Police could do nothing, nor the Solicitor. I wrote to the family member 3 times but was ignored so I imagine they have all gone on their woodburner 😢 I am still heartbroken about it. I had some fabulous teenage photos and baby photos. All gone now.

That's a real shame Primrose and seems spiteful

Primrose - what an awful thing to happen. She was obvious a close relative (she had the keys to your Mum’s house). We are all at THAT age.
Btw , I wish I was 56 again 😂

Sorry, got a bit distracted 👆
Most of us are at the age, when we’ve got to be careful who give the house keys to. It’s got me thinking !

HelterSkelter1

Years ago an aunt told me she couldn't bear to look at old family photos. And I thought how odd that was.

These days I feel the same. They leave me feeling so sad. I am in my 70s and now older than some of the relations pictured. At 56 you are nowhere near old! Fashions worn in the past and hairstyles made people look much older than they were.

I put so much effort into photo albums. I would put other things amongst the pictures. Hand prints, cinema tickets, certificates. I now can’t bear to look at them: it’s made even worse by the fact that many friends that are also in the photos have died. I always used to think that, if my house was on fire the first thing I would rescue would be my photo albums, but I don’t think I would now

I love looking at old photos I ve got so many, a whole bookcase of photo albums, because young people now keep them all on phones Tik Tok etc etc when my grandkids visit from overseas the first thing they do is get the albums out I ve got old ones from generations back I love looking at them quite the opposite of others on here

That is sad MayBee70. I can see how it can get to that.
I dont watch my wedding video much. Partly because a significant number of people in it are no longer alive.
And yes op, some of them look old even though they were only mid 50s at the time.

I havent got all photos in albums[yet].
Have partly been pondering whether to give several of the loose ones straight over to the next generation, divided equally, and they can decide themselves what to do with them.

Awful what happened Primrose53.

I don’t like looking at photos from my younger years - they remind me of how much time has passed and how little is left. I also have photos going back to the nineteenth century. My Mum did her best to put names to them but many will remain either a guess or completely unknown. It’s such a shame that they weren’t named at the time.

Biscuitmuncher, it’s always sad to look at a photo of a family member who has gone and especially to think that the photo was taken not long before they died and that they died at a young age. People from the past appear older than their years to us because fashions in clothes and hair have changed so much. Maybe your Dad was ill when the photo was taken and that would have aged him. Don’t dwell on it. You are still young - young enough to be my daughter and I’m 72. I don’t look or feel old. You’re young! Celebrate that.

When I go into my bathroom in the morning I always look at myself and say "still here, make the day count". I'm nearly 75, have lived much longer than either of my parents and sadly have lost too many good friends along the way. I've had a couple of occasions when I have faced my own mortality and I felt absolutely calm, fortunately it wasn't time for me to go. 56 is really quite young and the truth is, the older I've got the happier I've become. There are compensations!

I only have 2 photos of me as a child. One when I was about 6 months and another when I look about 3.
I’m afraid I can’t relate to the OP at all. I was still in my prime at 56.

My father was only 48 when he died but looked younger. To coin a phrase, ‘tall, dark and handsome’. Mum died at 67 but looked older from excessive smoking and had been very unwell for the last year of her life. I am now 70, which neither of them managed. I have some wonderful photos of when they were young.

Not so much photographs, but the passing of time for me. My Mum died when she was 68 following years of ill health (RA) resulting in her being housebound and later bedbound for years. She was able to do a little with DD1, but was helpless and dependent on others by the time DD2 arrived. At 72, I am now four years beyond her lifespan and in uncharted territory. Both DD’s are as old/older than I was when she died and I now have 2DGSs and as an only child, on a steep learning curve, trying to do my best to help in whatever ways I can.
I hope my Mum would be proud of my efforts.

Do you ever look at a photo' of yourself when younger - randomly - and are suddenly hit with the feeling that the gap between that time and now has just passed almost in the blink of an eye?

Widowed in 2016, photos of my dear DH upset me and even the happy family photos when the children were young, such golden times and half the time not realising it, thinking they would last forever…
But, we carry on, still in happiness, but a different kind.

I love looking at old photos, of family or anyone else. I like to see photos of people who have died, and I love photos from my childhood and youth. It’s nice to realise I once looked like that!

56 is so young. I married my second (and current) husband at 56. We've been married 20 years and together 28 happy years.

I find it funny that in the very old photos tiny little boys and little girls all wore dresses and you couldn’t tell them apart. Often the boys had lovely curls which disappeared as soon as they were about 4 or 5. Very cute. Also the little sailor suits the young boys wore.

Grandma70s

I love looking at old photos, of family or anyone else. I like to see photos of people who have died, and I love photos from my childhood and youth. It’s nice to realise I once looked like that!

The Victorians used to like taking photos of dead people, but trying to make them seem alive.
I'm sure that's not what you meant by liking to see photos of people who have died, but it took me straight to imagining the Victorians and their strange habit! 😅

Unfortunately, I don't have many photos of family now. My mother, in her wisdom of seeping into Alzheimer's, threw loads in the bin!!
Also, my children's dad had quite a few of us all, and friends, in a bag at his ex's place and her then bf threw the bag out when the binmen were there - I'll never forgive him for that, the evil &%£#@&%

Lovely sentiments foxie48,