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Depraved modern comedy.

(222 Posts)
Fair2good Thu 07-Mar-24 11:26:02

Last night we watched the film Northern Comfort on Netflix. It’s supposed to be a modern comedy about a group of people on a fear of flying course getting stranded in Iceland. Our granddaughter who is 15 is staying with us, and the film is a 15. I expected the usual raw language that is endemic in everything nowadays, but didn’t expect full frontal male nudes on a character’s phone and to my horror a scene where a man gives another man oral sex watched by his girlfriend. Why are film makers deliberately including perversion sandwiched in a so called comedy film ?
Pornography is just that, it shouldn’t be in a film rated for fifteen years olds. Our young people are being corrupted by people who are morally degenerate. I am cancelling Netflix today.

Galaxy Fri 08-Mar-24 09:12:27

I didnt make that comment.

Cossy Fri 08-Mar-24 09:14:51

M0nica

I should not be on this thread. i rarely watch tv and certainly not any of the programmes mentioned.

i have no moral outrage over what was seen but I think what we should ask is what would be public reaction if the people in these explicitly sexual situations were to behave in the same way in the street - and if the behaviour would not be acceptable in the supermarket entrance area, or on the High Street, or on any public highway, , why should it be considered acceptable to show it in our homes through public television services?

As fot saying that teenagers see worse on their phones. They do that mainly because they know that adults do not approve - and there is nothing most teenagers like more than a good dose of adult tutting.

You could argue the same thing about violence, which I consider far more of a concern, violence in TV, in films and in some horrendous video games and sadly this is played out in public, in our subways, in our high streets.

When my children, three of whom are still in their early/mid 20’s were in their mid/late teens I was far more concerned about them being caught up in violence on their nights out.

Cossy Fri 08-Mar-24 09:15:59

Galaxy

I didnt make that comment.

Ooops sorry. flowers

Galaxy Fri 08-Mar-24 09:17:36

But very violent men frequently have a history of porn use. It's often a red flag.
I am not in any way saying what OP was describing was porn, it wasnt, but it's perfectly reasonable to have a discussion on what is influencing young people and where it is coming from.

petra Fri 08-Mar-24 09:19:37

Iam64

Cossy - my concern links to specific drag queens where enquiries have shown those individuals shouldn’t be around children. Not all

Like this one performing at Adventure Island ( Southend)
Two friends of mine were there with their children. The management stopped the performance.

Galaxy Fri 08-Mar-24 09:19:50

No problem cossy.
I am going to have to sit down as an apology on social media is so raregrin. I hope I do the same in my conduct on social media.
The impact of social media on people is another interesting thing I think.

Dickens Fri 08-Mar-24 09:24:02

M0nica

I am not sure that selling sex is limited to capitalism. Sex can be merchanted. and is in every society capitalist or no. It is just done differently.

Various dictators and leaders of ostensibly socialist/communist countries have found ways of making sure that the needs of those in charge, right the way down the hierarchy get what they want, when they want. Kim Jong Un in North Korea, Sadam Hussein, and Col gaddafi in Libya all spring to mind.

Quite true MOnica.

I was just relating to an aspect of Capitalism, which applies largely in the West.

If we are talking about the sexual exploitation of women, any system will find a way to enhance it.

Mixing the two issues together - explicit sex scenes in films and plays etc, and sexual victimisation of women, it sort of muddies the waters a bit.

Something that troubles me - but I'm not sure bothers too many others, is this: In 'gala' events - like awards ceremonies in the entertainment world, the men will all be smartly dressed in suits, bow ties, etc, and the women standing next to these fully-clothed men will quite frequently be wearing outfits that are designed to show as much flesh as is legally allowed in public. There they stand wth the now 'traditional' provocative hand-on-hip, one knee slightly inclined inwards to enhance the shapeliness of the legs, in flimsy, revealing dresses, next to fully-clothed men grinning above their bow ties...

It always makes me uncomfortable. Not because I'm prudish (I hope) but because to me it strikingly shows the power imbalance between men and women. Barely-there apparel has now become so 'normalised' in these and other events, and I wonder what message it is sending out to both young men and young women.

OK, I guess that's slightly off-topic.

nadateturbe Fri 08-Mar-24 09:25:48

Galaxy

How is it homophobic if all sexes do it. There is lots of information about young girls being pressurised into anal sex because it is a key part of porn. There was an investigation a while back about injuries at a and e amongst young girls relating to this issue.

Shocking!

GrannyGravy13 Fri 08-Mar-24 09:27:20

petra

Iam64

Cossy - my concern links to specific drag queens where enquiries have shown those individuals shouldn’t be around children. Not all

Like this one performing at Adventure Island ( Southend)
Two friends of mine were there with their children. The management stopped the performance.

Some of our GC were removed extremely quickly…

25Avalon Fri 08-Mar-24 09:32:29

So we shouldn’t censor these shows as it infringes freedoms? Why then are so many books being censored and re-written? Why so many trigger warnings on them - I still can’t see why there is a trigger warning on “To the Lighthouse” by Virginia Wolfe apart from being difficult to understand and boring in parts.
Well we know what happens to most empires when they collapse, they sink into low moral standards, followed by debauchery and depravity.Afterwards the pendulum swings back the other way.

Cossy Fri 08-Mar-24 09:35:26

Galaxy

No problem cossy.
I am going to have to sit down as an apology on social media is so raregrin. I hope I do the same in my conduct on social media.
The impact of social media on people is another interesting thing I think.

I can be very passionate about my own opinions and get a bit carried away, but I’d never knowingly be deliberately rude and I’m quite happy to own it if I make a mistake.

My husband doesn’t “do debating”, so I love this site, I love that (mostly) we can express our views/opinions/beliefs safely and others can respectfully disagree.

People and their differences are what make our world interesting.

Have a good weekend smileflowers

Doodledog Fri 08-Mar-24 09:37:11

I have mixed feelings about trigger warnings, but when applied to tv and film I think they are a good way to allow adults to take responsibility for their own viewing and that of those in their care. I don't think that everyone's viewing should be 'suitable for' children and young people' in case their carers get it wrong, particularly now that streaming channels have made a watershed irrelevant.

I don't think that pornography is a good thing, but I think that's a separate debate, really.

Cossy Fri 08-Mar-24 09:41:14

25Avalon

So we shouldn’t censor these shows as it infringes freedoms? Why then are so many books being censored and re-written? Why so many trigger warnings on them - I still can’t see why there is a trigger warning on “To the Lighthouse” by Virginia Wolfe apart from being difficult to understand and boring in parts.
Well we know what happens to most empires when they collapse, they sink into low moral standards, followed by debauchery and depravity.Afterwards the pendulum swings back the other way.

I think we SHOULD censor, but this film was censored, it was a 15? Maybe we should be more concerned about sloppy censorship, if this had been an 18, due to explicit sexual content, then OP wouldn’t have selected it, it was a 15 and designated as a comedy.

Galaxy Fri 08-Mar-24 09:44:23

No I am not sure about trigger warnings because I am not keen on censorship of any kind. But I think talking about the influences that impact predominantly on young girls as Dickens has mentioned is useful. It's that whole choice thing again, if all the choices promoted are aimed at mens pleasure how much of a choice is it.

Galaxy Fri 08-Mar-24 09:46:53

Then again I probably am keen on the censorship that I agree with, and that's the problem.

Luckygirl3 Fri 08-Mar-24 10:01:49

Sexual activity in most (?all) cultures takes place in private. I do not know exactly why this is so, but it is. For this reason watching others having sex is not the norm. If we see a couple smile alluringly at one another, we know what is likely to follow - we would not expect to watch it happen. And we do not need to see it happen onscreen.

My concern about the sort of sex that youngsters see on screen is that it is often divorced from any sort of relationship. Now clearly casual sex does happen IRL but I am guessing that most of us would not regard that as something we might wish our children or GC to aspire to - we hope that they will find someone who respects and cares for them and with whom they can lovingly explore sexual activity of whatever kind.

The acceptance of the bland assumption that our young people are being exposed to sexual activity on their phones and that is OK concerns me. I do not think it is OK. I think it is confusing and disturbing for them and sets up the expectation (particularly amongst girls) that this is what is expected of them.

The film that the OP cites should not in my opinion be rated as OK for 15 year olds to watch; and I would go further and say that I do not think anyone needs to watch voyeurism taking place.

Many actors are themselves disturbed by the sex scenes they are asked to take part in. Why should they be pushed inexorably down this route? Watching people having sex is not a normal activity. And porn addiction is becoming more of a problem and undermining many relationships.

My children knew the basics of sex from the age of about 4, so I am in no way coy about this. But they also learned about loving relationships, respect and kindness, and this was central to our conversations on the subject.

So many films and TV series go further than needed in terms of depicting sexual activity - as in real life, we can imagine the next steps.

Cossy Fri 08-Mar-24 11:24:48

Luckygirl3

Sexual activity in most (?all) cultures takes place in private. I do not know exactly why this is so, but it is. For this reason watching others having sex is not the norm. If we see a couple smile alluringly at one another, we know what is likely to follow - we would not expect to watch it happen. And we do not need to see it happen onscreen.

My concern about the sort of sex that youngsters see on screen is that it is often divorced from any sort of relationship. Now clearly casual sex does happen IRL but I am guessing that most of us would not regard that as something we might wish our children or GC to aspire to - we hope that they will find someone who respects and cares for them and with whom they can lovingly explore sexual activity of whatever kind.

The acceptance of the bland assumption that our young people are being exposed to sexual activity on their phones and that is OK concerns me. I do not think it is OK. I think it is confusing and disturbing for them and sets up the expectation (particularly amongst girls) that this is what is expected of them.

The film that the OP cites should not in my opinion be rated as OK for 15 year olds to watch; and I would go further and say that I do not think anyone needs to watch voyeurism taking place.

Many actors are themselves disturbed by the sex scenes they are asked to take part in. Why should they be pushed inexorably down this route? Watching people having sex is not a normal activity. And porn addiction is becoming more of a problem and undermining many relationships.

My children knew the basics of sex from the age of about 4, so I am in no way coy about this. But they also learned about loving relationships, respect and kindness, and this was central to our conversations on the subject.

So many films and TV series go further than needed in terms of depicting sexual activity - as in real life, we can imagine the next steps.

Yes, we absolutely can. Nothing wrong with showing a passionate and then cutting to them just in bed or finishing dressing etc We can all use our imagination.

Cossy Fri 08-Mar-24 11:25:07

Passionate kiss!

MissAdventure Fri 08-Mar-24 11:33:06

Then they get out of bed and stand behind a pot plant, or something....

Cossy Fri 08-Mar-24 11:41:26

MissAdventure

Then they get out of bed and stand behind a pot plant, or something....

😂😂😂😂😂😂

Caleo Fri 08-Mar-24 11:45:50

Fair to Good, pornography corrupts but sex acts do not corrupt unless unkindness and cruelty are portrayed as normality.

Pornography portrays unkind acts, but explicit sex in all its imaginative variety is not only pleasure but it is also kind.
The lesson a fifteen year old needs is : kindness and pleasure are good/unkindness and pleasure are bad.

Prudishness is no help to young people.

Fair2good Fri 08-Mar-24 12:43:21

Caleo I absolutely disagree with you. What you term prudishness was seen as decent behaviour in my day. I’m saddened by many of the comments on here but appreciate that the majority of gransnetters will be a lot younger than I am.
All I can say is that what I see as a decline in moral standards over the years has produced a harvest that no one should be proud of. Few people marry, those that do are lucky if it lasts more than a few years. Young people have multiple partners with a massive increase in sexually transmitted diseases including syphilis. Abortion rates are sky high despite there being the best contraception freely available. Children are lucky to live in families where their biological fathers are around and instead many of them see a series of male partners in their mother’s lives. Kids as young as ten are addicted to pornography. Male violence towards women is widespread, sexual offences against women are increasing and even sexual offences committed by children against other children aren’t uncommon.
This is the great utopia the liberalism of the 60’s led to. I’m glad I won’t be alive to see the horrors of the next 20 years in view of what the last 20 has brought.
I pity young people today, perhaps if some of the posters on here had been a little less liberal in the upbringing of their children, those children might be leading happier lives.

nadateturbe Fri 08-Mar-24 13:20:55

Well said Fair2good.

Germanshepherdsmum Fri 08-Mar-24 13:22:55

I don’t know how old you are, Fair2good, so I don’t know when ‘your day’ might have been. You try to excuse what I agree with Caleo is prudishness by saying you ‘appreciate that the majority of Gransnetter will be a lot younger than [you]’. I ver

GrannyGravy13 Fri 08-Mar-24 13:23:29

Fair2good I can assure you that our children are leading very happy lives, as are our grandchildren…

Do you want the world to go back to when it was deemed risque to show one’s ankles?