Passed away.

I'm another who doesn't shy away from the words "dead" and "died". They leave no room for misinterpretation & are to the point. I don't like "passed away" and just "passed" is even worse - passed what??

We're going to a funeral tomorrow. It's for the mother of friends who I've known my whole life. The deceased was very old. As we file out of the crematorium I expect we'll have the chance to shake hands with the bereaved family members. What should I say? I always used to say, 'Sorry for your loss' but that always feels a bit trite and soulless. Any suggestions for a more personal thing to say?

Yes MissAdventure and what they mock I could never wish on them.

My daughter is lost, I am lost without her , fact

Agreed.
Unless people have cognitive issues.

I don’t believe it causes confusion, pretending it does give an opportunity for crass mockery

The expression "I'm sorry for your loss" is a standard and widespread way of expressing one's condolences, isn't it?

If it is OK to use the noun like that, I can't see anything inherently wrong with using the verb in the context of death, either. They come as a pair, in that a loss is always preceded by the act of losing.

Just because those words have more than one meaning, I don't see why anyone should avoid them in this context. It would be very rare indeed for them to cause any genuine confusion, I think.

Some people choose not to get it

MissAdventure

🙄

Agree MissA
Some people just do t get it!

🙄

For e it’s when they use the word ‘lost’. Always smacks of carelessness

annsixty

Once more today I have been told someone has passed away.
It seems nobody dies now.
Does it seem easier to say?
Don’t people like the word died?
It is used more and more.
Am I the only one who would prefer to hear that someone has died?
I realise I may be in a minority here.

Yes annsixty you’re right. it does seem easier to say, and if it helps people through that awful initial grief it’s their choice.
As has already been said, we are all different and no one should really pass judgement on another’s choice of words, (not saying you are but talking generally)
Just my opinion, others will have theirs.

or left us

annsixty, you just asked a question. You didn’t criticise anyone’s else’s choice of words to express death any more than I would. If it offends the listener, rather than the grieving person, sorry.
Suggesting it means that saying I lost my Mum means I’m not facing the truth is silly. I know my Mum is no longer here.
If someone said my dog died, or passed or us, I would ask when did he die, or pass or leave you, but that’s because I respect their chosen word.

Ann, it's not you, it's "the others."
I wouldn't for one minute think you would mean anything by your op.

May I just point out that in my OP I didn’t criticise anyone or say it was wrong, I merely asked if “passed away “ was getting to be used more and that personally I preferred to say died.

It is the media who have taken died, death and made it into passing over,lost, etc did you really lose your Grandma,Friend?
It does not offend but it can mean in the grieving process for some it means not facing the truth
So sorry but soon they will reinvent born and birth with what ?
Jesus passed over /was lost on the cross ? Death is part of life

icanhandthemback

^The trouble with pass or passed away is it can mean many different things.

Departed this life. ..Went to Heaven.. joined the angels...^

But they all mean someone is dead. I think it is a bit churlish to be critical of the way someone who is experiencing or has experienced the loss of a loved one.

Yes.

Quote annifrance Tue 12-Mar-24 08:13:25
Agree with Monica. Hate euphemisms for death, dead or dying.

A friend once told me she had lost her small daughter. My knee jerk reaction was to ask if she had been to the police.

Congratulations for the cruelest post I have read on GransNet,
your friends little daughter was either a box of ashes or buried in a grave, you think it’s funny 🤮

Losing a child is the most horrendous thing that can happen to a human being and if some nit picking unfunny arsehole sees amusement in the terminology used by bereaved parents then that is their shame

I simply don't believe that.
Surely people are able to determine that what the person means, and if they can't, well, I'm surprised.

Agree with Monica. Hate euphemisms for death, dead or dying.

A friend once told me she had lost her small daughter. My knee jerk reaction was to ask if she had been to the police.

Always ‘died’ in our family ….. always ‘dead’

^The trouble with pass or passed away is it can mean many different things.

Departed this life. ..Went to Heaven.. joined the angels...^

But they all mean someone is dead. I think it is a bit churlish to be critical of the way someone who is experiencing or has experienced the loss of a loved one.

Perhaps we should invent a new word which is inoffensive to everyone?

I probably wouldn't say he popped his clogs, fell off his perch or kicked the bucket but we all know what it means.

Euphemisms can be useful in these circumstances.

The trouble with pass or passed away is it can mean many different things.

Departed this life. ..Went to Heaven.. joined the angels...

It doesn’t bother me how people want to refer to a friend or relative dying.If saying passed away is a gentler thing for them to say then that’s fine.
Ditto saying they lost their husband/ partner/ wife, we all know what it means and yes, it is a loss.