In praise of adult children

JackyB

I have often bitten my tongue here on GN when I have been bursting to say how wonderful my family are. Especially my DiLs (I have 3 boys). It always seemed smug to say how lucky I am, with so many grandparents cut off from their AC.

This thread has brought tears to my eyes

No, don't bite your tongue. It's not being smug. I wish we all could have happy experiences and I feel for those who don't, but Gransnet needs to see a balance of stories, not just problematic ones.

I have a mixture of AC and

All of my children are growing into good people with good morals and we rarely argue. It is a breath of fresh air after my home growing up

MissAdventure it's so nice that this kind thread has allowed you to write down what you wanted to say about your loving daughter. You should be very proud.

My three offspring frequently come up trumps to help. I recently moved house but chose that moment to go into hospital. My new home was decorated and everything moved from one house to the new one while I sat with a rug o my knees! I can never thank them enough for all they have done and still do.

Ah thank you.
Even her milkman cried when she died.
"Ah, she was a lovely kid!" He said.

I remember her too, MissAdventure.
She was a lovely person, a daughter to be very proud of.

My 5 are fairly normal.

Mostly they are great - but sometimes a pain!

They have produced a heap of lovely grandchildren for us to love, they work hard and are brilliant parents.

However, we know they would be here at the drop of a hat should we need them. And, they know we are too should they need us.

I remember your daughter MissAdventure. You must miss her so much.

Thank you.
I wasn't sure I would be able to write it out.
Glad I did now.

Your daughter sounds really lovely MissAdventure, I’m sure many of us our counting our blessings that ours are still with us as we read your post.

My family DS and DD and their spouses are generally stars . I’m also so grateful they get on and have a strong bond.
Two years ago I had a hip replacement and was quite anxious about how I would manage for the first few days as I’m widowed and live alone . My DS arrived every morning the first week at 8 am to get my breakfast and make a flask of tea and I had “meals on wheels” provided by him each evening. Once I was independent and getting about he arrived with a lanyard so I could wear my mobile for emergencies. Not so grateful for that though!

My daughter was exceptionally kind.
She shopped for, and helped the people in the little road where she lived. (Even though they were less than kind to her at times)
She turned her car around and went back to the hospital where we had just spent almost ten hours, because my neighbour was in a panic about catching the bus.
She sponsored animals, children abroad, and contributed a huge amount towards her friends shopping each week.

She never judged anyone, always tried to consider others' feelings or issues, and all of her last texts to me were urging me to try and rest, and apologising for needing help.

She took my mum shopping, gradually doing more and more of it herself, without complaints, for over ten years, and cut mums grass for longer still. She called in to see my mums hairdresser, who was diagnosed with cancer, and ended up taking her for her chemo sessions, although she really didn't even know her that well.

She listened to a nurse who chose to confide in her while she was in hospital, and she tried to help other patients wherever and however she could.

She was funny, and feisty, loved animals, and people.

I couldn't be more proud.

Two lovely sons. The younger one is more demonstrative and always pops in when he can. He’s just been earlier and caught me dusting, he took the duster and did the high frames of the pictures.
Seeing elder one and family later, for postponed Easter, as they’ve been away.

JackyB

I have often bitten my tongue here on GN when I have been bursting to say how wonderful my family are. Especially my DiLs (I have 3 boys). It always seemed smug to say how lucky I am, with so many grandparents cut off from their AC.

Same here. So now we have bee invited to sing their praises ,I will.

Our Three DDs and two Sons in law are wonderful. Always ready to help when they can and regularly in touch with messages and visits. Regardless of how busy they are.
We have at least one holiday with them all each year.
Of course we sometimes disagree with each other but are happy to agree to disagree.
We are so , so lucky.

My son-in-law recently drove over to lend me his drill and stayed to put up the tricky curtain rail in the bay window - which is what I'd needed the drill for. The fixing points are only just about 20 millimetres (¾ inch).
He is a perfectionist and one of the few people who seems to think as I do about details.

It had to be put up with a couple of millimetres difference one side to the other so that it looked straight (we have a Victorian house with hand made mouldings/old plaster etc.) and it's perfect. It did take a long time - but I think it would have taken all day without his help. He didn't need to stay. ♥️

Sorry about the untidy ending. I should also add that my son’s in-laws have also been kind. I was included in their family meal at Easter. When I needed transport to a distant hospital they kindly took me. They refused any petrol money. M said “ It gave us an opportunity to do a kindness” . How lovely.

Our lovely adult children often can be very trying, BUT do come up trumps when needed.

Never any estrangements, normal sibling rivalry, nothing spiteful or malicious, family “get togethers” happen around four times a year with us all together, but we all share a family WhatsApp group and keep in touch with those no longer living with us.

We have large age range from 40 down to 21 so interesting to see positive changes as they grow up a bit.

I always wanted a large family as an only child, and in this way at least I feel very blessed.

I have often bitten my tongue here on GN when I have been bursting to say how wonderful my family are. Especially my DiLs (I have 3 boys). It always seemed smug to say how lucky I am, with so many grandparents cut off from their AC.

This thread has brought tears to my eyes

My two adult children have been so supportive especially since DH died. My daughter checks in with me most days and recently has taken lots to the tip or charity shops in her car. Her husband often plates up a spare meal for me. My son has less time available but has sorted the garage, invited me for lots of meals which he cooks and is coming to move furniture ready for the decorator.
Yesterday I started a thread about downsizing crockery. Ironically the day after DH died various family members came to the house and my son sorted all the drinks, sandwich lunches etc on a rare assortment of odd plates that are used everyday. The best china could have been used!
Three of the four young adult grandchildren have done their bit too. I love them all to bits and am really grateful.
I am so grateful for all they do

[First meal was to celebrate Mother's Day...]

I've been a single mum to my 2 sons since they were small. I'm now 75, live on my own and have not needed help from them at all - yet - thankfully.
What I can praise both of them for is being fully committed to their families: solid, consistent, caring and hard working, both happily married [with their partners for 22+28 years]. They both back their children's activities 100%. They've given me 4 adored grandchildren. I admire them for all this.

Recently though I had a wonderful meal cooked for me by eldest son and grandsons, and gifts from my youngest. A fortnight later on my birthday the youngest invited me for the day with them all, and another lovely roast dinner which he cooked! I felt truly blessed.
This may not sound amazing, but in 50+ years neither have ever forgotten Mother's Day or my birthday. I think that's something and I greatly appreciate it all...although I do NOT expect it nor would I mind if they missed either.
So yes, I can praise my 2 boys and have given thanks for them many, many times over the years.

I've been so lucky with my sons. They have done so much for me, especially since living alone. Everything from painting my house to fixing my car, to visiting me regularly. It means so much.
I am truly sorry for parents who don't have this. Nothing hurts as much as being estranged/neglected/forgotten by our own children, I'm sure.

I'm not going to detail anything but yes, ours are wonderful too.

Thus far I can only say we are so happy and proud that ours are all successful, happy and thriving. If I say much more it’s too much like boasting when I see a d hear some family dynamics. This the thing with small communities, we all know a fair bit about other’s business.
So I give thanks that life has worked out this way as it’s very often that luck too is involved.