My executors?

In my letter of wishes I have said ( amongst other things) that I hope my daughter will share out my jewellery with other family members. I know she does not want it herself. I have include photos and details of value ( or not) and indicated which pieces came from my mum, just as guidance. I have also listed other "family " items and hope they might want to keep them in the family, but if they don't, that's up to them. For me, it is more a question of providing information to enable them to make decisions at the time.

When we were clearing my parents' house, after family had taken what they wanted ( and there were no arguments ), we got a house clearance firm in. They charged us for the cost of the skip, and paid us for items they could sell in their bric a brac shop. The two amounts cancelled each other out! So the job was free. Mind you we had all done a huge amount of clearing already ourselves.

In your place, I would most definitely not make my step-daughters my executors. And forget about a letter of wishes. Anything you want to decide about how money, keepsakes etc. are to be bequeathed needs to be written down in your will, which should be drawn up by a solicitor. He or she should be able to estimate what the charges will be for carrying out your instructions.

You say your own daughter has learning difficulties - rather vague, if she is under any form of guardianship this needs to be addressed in your will too. I would not trust sisters, stepsisters or any other relation to see fair play, as even in the nicest families people tend to change when inheritance is at stake. If your daughter cannot deal with her affairs herself, you need to appoint someone to deal with them for her.

The executor's fee comes out of your total estate before it is apportioned to those you leave it to, which seems to me to be the fairest way of dealing with the matter.

My DH and his brother were executors of their mum estate, but as often happens all the hard work was done by DH and our sons. They maintained the house and gardens until it could be sold. My B-I-l then wanted my dh to hand over some money for his GC, who was born after their mum died. DH said no and we’ve not spoken to them since. Which is a win in my book, never really liked them anyway

I'm reading this thread with interest as I am currently trying to deal with the various legal issues following the loss of a very close family member.

I have no idea what probate means and as I am not actually the executor things may happen that I don't even know about at a very sad time.

I was executor for mums estate to save any hassle in the family I used a solicitor to do probate, it was about £100k of investments etc, nothing complicated like shares plus the house. They charged over £10k, they were rubbish it took 3 1/2 yrs excuse after excuse

This is a really interesting post as (gasp) we have still not made a will ( Shock Horror)

Executor has take over 3 years to sort a trust for my Grandson,it's still on and not sorted out yet.Not sure what to do .Any advice please.

Gwan1

Executor has take over 3 years to sort a trust for my Grandson,it's still on and not sorted out yet.Not sure what to do .Any advice please.

Who is executor?, a solicitor or a family member, trusts can get complicated, best if you explain the details of the will, someone will give guidance.

Hello everyone. Thank you for the welcome and not so welcome advice! It is difficult to be too specific because of "outing". If possible, I shall include step children because they are quite involved with my daughter anyway. |The Trust appears to be a good idea because I can state, quite clearly, what I wish to happen. Still working on this/

Greenlady thanks for info. Might sound a little silly, but as a solicitor has been appointed as executor does this mean they come into the property before they appoint house clearance?

Who pays the house clearance company and how do they decide on a price?

Depending on how vulnerable your daughter is, it may be possible to leave her a legacy in the form of a Vulnerable Person’s Trust. My mum did this for my sister. The legacy is invested and the Trustees are allowed to spend an agreed sum each year for her. When she dies, will inherit the capital. It does not affect her benefits. A solicitor will be needed to set this up properly in your will.

Lilly of the Valley

You have to leave the solicitor to distribute the will fairly, do not involve other family they will try to manipulate the outcome.
This will probably mean that nobody is satisfied with the result, one thing for sure the more hassle the solicitor gets the higher the bill will be and if it’s disputed very costly.

Long complicated story but it's an uncle who is the executor to my Grandson's inheritance. He was supposed to sort a trust out for him but he hasn't yet done this afternoon 3 years..Should we just get a lawyer involved? Don't want to fall out with him as it's my Grandson's future inheritance.

He will need a lawyer and should have got this sorted out long ago.

After three years, I would say that you (*Gwan1*) need a lawyer as well. Make sure you get one who specialises in wills, probate etc.. Ring local solicitors and ask whether they have such a specilaist. I think most will, or, I think, the Law Society has lists of solictors their specialties and places of work. perhaps GSM can confirm that.

Yes, the Law Society has lists of solicitors and the type of work they do. Gwan doesn’t say if the grandson is under 18 or if this is the only element of the estate which hasn’t been dealt with. If the grandson is under 18 his parents should contact a solicitor on his behalf. I’m surprised that the trust wasn’t created in the will.

I would contact your uncle who is executor and ask him what the issue is in a non confrontational way, there could be all sorts of reasons, including being overwhelmed by formalities.

Executors are often appointed from the same generation, in this case the disease's brother, advancing years does not speed up paperwork. If a trust is to be set up you will need a lawyer to do that it’s far too complex for a layman. When wills are written it is underestimated how much it costs or the pitfalls.

greenlady102

PamQS

I’ve been an executor for my
Mother, and as far as I can see there’s no check to see that you’ve carried out the bequests in the will. I did find it emotionally draining, though, and it went very slowly, so my sister (the other executor) and I agreed to hand a lot of work on to the solicitor. She was very careful about the rights of my brother, who had lived with my mum for some years, but didn’t want to be an executor.

The solicitor would certainly keep hold of the money and distribute it. But there’s no control over the possessions left in the house, AFAIK, so if there’s anything valuable, like jewellery, you might want to put it somewhere safe.

I think in this situation I’d turn to my nieces and nephews, who have always been close to our family.

its the job of the executor to do the best they can for the beneficiaries and that includes possessions. If they dispose of jewellery or valuables and this is discovered (ie somone asks where Mum's diamonds are) the executor could be in deep do do

I was Executor and carried out everything by the book, thoroughly, carefully and honestly.

However, someone went into the deceased’s home and stole items which were left to me in the Will along with money and sentimental photos which I would have shared out to all the family including the “thief”.

They didn’t get into any “deep do do” because the Police and Solicitor said there was nothing they could do.

I am just pinning my hopes on karma. 😉

Dh and a BiL were co-executors for an aunt of mine. Her affairs were fairly straightforward - house already sold for care home fees, etc. and they did most of it, but looked for a solicitor to deal with probate.

One quote (small town in Yorkshire Dales close to BiL) was twice the other - busy much bigger town in the SE, near dh’s office.

Maybe it was affected by the amount of business they could attract - or wanted - but it did seem a bit odd.

That's rotten Primrose. I have faith in karma myself. Time wounds all heels as my Dad would say