Swearing

Ilovecheese

Doodledog
"Swearing can be used as a bonding mechanism." Yes, I agree with that. I will swear when I am with my husband, very close friends and now that my daughters are middle aged, with them, but not when they are with their children.

RosiesMaw was talking about how swear words have changed over the years. I believe it was Oliver Cromwell's puritans that changed "God blind me" to "Gorblimey" and "God's blood" to just "bloody".

Strewth is from God's Truth.

BigMamma

I have always said that anyone who swears when having a conversation has a lack of the English language. They swear because they cannot think of a word to use.

Absolute tosh!
Kenneth Tynan was the first person to use the word fuck on tv.
He was a graduate of Oxford and the literary manager of the National Theatre.

Doodledog
"Swearing can be used as a bonding mechanism." Yes, I agree with that. I will swear when I am with my husband, very close friends and now that my daughters are middle aged, with them, but not when they are with their children.

RosiesMaw was talking about how swear words have changed over the years. I believe it was Oliver Cromwell's puritans that changed "God blind me" to "Gorblimey" and "God's blood" to just "bloody".

Occasionally I will say the F word especially if I'm angry but I don't swear publicly. I absolutely hate it if I'm around loud foul mouth people or if with my granchildren . I am offended by its use every other word . My sister swears all the time and says its normal speak ! It's awful the use of F every few words . I've given up asking her not to say it .
I am not snobby or stuck up I could swear like a trooper if I chose to but I don't unless I am fed up , bang my toe , or just feel like expressing my exasperation in private

Ilovecheese

That is very interesting Doodledog. Whether or not I swear depends on who I am talking to a lot of the time. I told my granddaughter that I had sworn at "Alexa" and she said that she had never heard me swear so I think I must censor myself without thinking.

I, too, find language interesting.

Swearing can be used as a bonding mechanism. As you say, we tend to self-censor, and swearing in front of someone can show that you see them as in your 'inner circle', if you get it right - obviously it can sometimes backfire.

People used to swear by the things they held most dear
“upon my honour”, “ upon my life ” “on my granny’s/mother’s grave”, or respected “Christ, ” Jesus” “Zounds (God’s wounds) “ “Jesus, Mary and Joseph and the wee donkey” or feared “Hell and damnation”
Now it seems to be based on body parts or sexual activity.
I won’t bother with examples!

Well, I hate to hear the ‘f’ word being used every touch and turn.

I may say certain words, but never that or t..t or c..t.

I always think that they are only words and it’s the intent behind the words which are offensive, which can be done using much less “offensive” language.

I have children in their 20’s, and they swear like troupers, our other two, in their late 30’s, only swear under dire circumstances.

I do swear, normally at myself, never in public and rarely use the ‘C’ word.

I would never swear when children are around, and swearing rarely offends me and I have a very large vocabulary, am well educated and pretty articulate, so I don’t buy into the “it’s only thick people” who swear.

What I absolutely and completely hate is seeing parents swearing, shouting and smacking their children in public, it makes me wonder greatly what goes on behind closed doors, ditto the way a few men speak to their wives in public, makes me cringe!

Tbh, everyone I knows swears regardless of age both my kids, me my DH. No one bats an eyelid anymore.
That old adage of lacking intelligence if you swear is just Bull...

That is very interesting Doodledog. Whether or not I swear depends on who I am talking to a lot of the time. I told my granddaughter that I had sworn at "Alexa" and she said that she had never heard me swear so I think I must censor myself without thinking.

Yes, I must admit it put me right off. There really is no need for it. I'm surprised that the admins allow it as it surely doesn't enhance the impression of the site.

BigMamma

I have always said that anyone who swears when having a conversation has a lack of the English language. They swear because they cannot think of a word to use.

There is a lot of research that suggests otherwise.

Here is just one article that is available without a university library subscription:

www.sciencealert.com/swearing-is-a-sign-of-more-intelligence-not-less-say-scientists

Some evidence shows that those who oppose swearing on principle are more 'rules bound' than those who draw on a range of registers, and are less likely to have a high IQ and/or vocabulary - they do as others tell them, rather than think for themselves.

Much depends on how the words are used. Sometimes it is laziness, such as the use of sh*t as a filler. 'I feel sh*t', 'it was sh*t', 'he/she talks sh*t' and so on. I'm not a fan of that sort of swearing, as it doesn't communicate effectively, and is rather ugly to visual communicators. But strengthening an argument by using expletives can show degrees of feeling, as some words have more power than others, so their use can add nuance, rather than remove it as in the previous example. It's all context-dependent.

BigMamma

I have always said that anyone who swears when having a conversation has a lack of the English language. They swear because they cannot think of a word to use.

Couldn't agree more BigMamma.

I have always said that anyone who swears when having a conversation has a lack of the English language. They swear because they cannot think of a word to use.

Thanks Astitchintime. It was my fault - I’d given DGS2 a coin to put in a lady’s bucket (for the local Hospice). She wasn’t paying attention, talking to a member of staff and I realized DGS2’s mini trolley was likely to hit her legs, so I took a big step forward to steady him and my right heel just skidded, resulting in my right leg going one way and the left going the other. They both rushed to help me and asked if they could get me a chair, etc. but I was so embarrassed, I just beat a hasty retreat – well as much as my limp would allow me. Ouch.

LOUISA1523

Times change 🤷‍♀️.... and not just swearing.....I mean we don't slap our kids any more hopefully ( I never slapped mine and my GDs are never slapped) .....I would finding that far more offensive than someone say fuck in my presence

Agreed.

I think it's important that people know when and where to swear if they choose to do so. I am careful what I say on here, for instance, but am less circumspect in other circumstances.

Slapping children isn't going to stop them swearing. It might make them careful not to do it in front of the slapper, but people have used expletives since language began, and will continue to do so, despite any parental violence.

A lot of the swearing I hear on the bus is degrading to women.
Isn't it odd that even women can be heard calling someone a C**t or a Tw** . Do you suppose they know what these words mean?

I was taught not to swear and hardly ever do. My DC don't either at least I haven't heard them 😅

DerbyshireLass good point, well made.

I had been thinking that lately, I have been hearing much less swearing.
Though I live in areas that dont have a huge amount of younger people.

A well placed expletive can be very effective for its shock value. When swearing is overdone it becomes meaningless.

I rarely swear, and never in front my children, even though they are now pushing 40. Lol. I still like to set a good example.

However one day, out of sheer exasperation, I dropped the F bomb on my unruly 20 something son who was being obnoxious. The look shock on his face was priceless. It worked though because from that day onward he mended his ways.

I think if I had been in the habit of swearing it wouldn't have been nearly as effective, it would have been water off a duck's back.

Language does evolve and rightly so, we need new words to meet the ever changing need to communicate effectively. However, language is a precision instrument and words should be chosen with that in mind. For example. A scalpel and an axe are both cutting tools but have widely different uses.

Expletives can work but only when used correctly and not as part of normal speech.

A little goes a long way.......

Georgesgran

I’ve just slipped in Morrisons. Landed on my backside and the air was blue!

Ouch! I do hope you're alright Georgesgran? What did you slip on? Was the incident reported?

maddyone

I don’t like swearing.

I don;t like slapping and who is going to slap them?

It really jars with me and undermines any points people might be making. I don't go on Mumsnet, but do hear lots of people interjecting everyday words with swear words and seem unaware it may cause offence.

We all swear at times as an expletive, but when it is used as an adjective it devalues everything the person is saying.

I don’t like swearing.

Iam64

LOUISA1523 - absolutely.

Tiley - mumsnet posters are adult. I didn’t smack mine when the were children, it wouldn’t enter my head to smack one of them for swearing. Well providing it wasn’t in anger - that’s always been unacceptable here

I didn't say I slapped my children but my mother slapped us occasionally on the back of the legs. It certainly did me no harm and indeed it made me think twice about misbehaving whatever form it took