When did 'Passing' become the new word for died????

It sort of suggests that the loved one has slipped or whispered away to a better peaceful place. Died just sounds so final. I stick with passed away, if that's OK.

When I write a letter of sympathy to anyone (always write never a card) who is grieving I always
say died.

ixion

Nurse training stressed the need to avoid the verb 'lost' when explaining a patient's death.
As in, I am so sorry we have lost x.

^Lost? Well which ward was he going to?^

Same here.. Lost sounds like someone has been careless.
Passed away, is gentle.

Died definitely for humans but strangely I use “lost” when one of my animals die. Wonder why? Odd.

I think it’s personal choice and the bereaved person may have their own reason for using the term passed/passed away. For some they just can’t bring themselves to say died.

I say died but I don’t have a problem with anyone saying otherwise.

I always say “died”.

I don’t mind “passed away” too much; but “lost”? Where did you leave them???

Worse still is “late”! I heard a Nigerian say that their father was “late”!! Oh dear.

Emphatically not as in “the late…”. This was as “my father is late” when asked about parents’ whereabouts

Nursing today would recommend that you take the person's lead, since it is their choice, not medical staff.
Person centred planning, and all that.

I say ‘died’. I am ok with ‘passed away’, as it seems gentler, if you like, but cannot bear ‘passed’.
My mum used to say X ‘has gone’

I respect what others choose

MissAdventure

Nursing today would recommend that you take the person's lead, since it is their choice, not medical staff.
Person centred planning, and all that.

This ,definitely

Always use died and death in our family. We’d find it odd not to. When talking with bereaved people I use the term they choose, it seems respectful somehow.

I agree. The death of a loved one - human or pet - is very stressful and whatever term people feel comfortable in using is ok. I’m ok with using death and dying but others aren’t. It’s just a personal choice.

I saw a school mum last year in town after not having seen her for a few years. Her son and mine were in the same class, my son is now mid twenties.

I asked how her son was. She said he had passed, so I said "oh, well done" thinking perhaps I should have known about an exam or something through the grapevine.

Of course, if she had said he had died that awkward conversation wouldn't have happened.

She chose not to say died

I choose not to say it, sometimes
It depends how I feel.

I always say my husband is dead.or died and hate on the rare occasions I had to say late as he was never late for anything in his life . Apart from his funeral . The one before us over ran and remember saying to our children your dad would hate this as he hated queuing . It made us laugh. Which would have seemed odd especially as we could see people crying before we even went into the crem.

We had an unspoken pact we wouldn't cry during his funeral and I am glad we didn't as there was so many people from all over the country to thank for coming. There was no wake as we didn't believe in them or flowers . But had donations if people wanted to give . In the end we gave the cancer ward who treated him over £5,000 but it was to be used for things patients needed it wanted like a good bottle of whiskey or a fan etc.

It's funny even in this day and age people don't like to say dead or died. Which seems very strange to me . The worst phrase is they have gone to the great beyond 🤦. I always want to say beyond what ?

It's like when I was younger and remember.my nan saying in a quiet voice Mrs so and so has the big C. As if the word cancer was a dirty word..

The English is changing all the time but funny enough saying dead or died is still not used enough. But that's just my thoughts .

I think it's very much like the ashes issue.

Some people talk to them, carry a handful around, speak of them as if they are the person.

For others, it just seems daft.

The main thing is that whatever helps people get through, is fine.

Perhaps some people just find it easier, on themselves or others, to avoid the word died. I think whatever people can cope with is fine, especially if it somehow makes them feel better.

It doesn’t matter,though. Whatever makes you feel good and who are we to know the feelings of others?

I hate this word passing also lost. I have not lost my husband he has died and I know exactly where he is, he’s in our local cemetery in a grave so he’s not lost to me. Why are people afraid to use the word dead, that’s final. Sorry but just my own opinion.

I met a friend recently who said “I thought you had gone” and not long after my husband had died or passed as I prefer, I said what do you mean gone? she said I thought you had moved house 🤣🤣 passed over means passed into the next world at the right hand side of God if you’re a believer, there’s so much comfort there, free from pain and into a happier place is my belief and that’s why most people prefer that word - no one needs to be offended - but then we’re all different and thank God for that

People can say passing or passed away, it does not annoy me, they obviously find it difficult to use the word died and that is their problem, not mine. I have never used those words, when I respond I always use the word died.

Before my father died at a very elderly age, he used to read the daily death column in the local newspaper and say: 'Am I still here? Oh, yes, I am. That's good'. Thinking back time past we had many quite disrespectful phrases like: fell of their perch, kicked the bucket, went west, snuffed it, and worst of all 'croaked'. Perhaps 'passed' is not so bad after all.

I believe families of murder victims do not like the term 'he lost his life'; one mother said 'he did not lose his life, it was taken away from him,' Dreadfully true.
'Passed' to me indicates the deceased has gone from one sphere to another; the awful fact about death is that it is final. The use of 'passed' at a time when belief in an afterlife is increasingly decried seems strange.