Speak to strangers.

I just wish I could strike up a conversation, I’ve suffered with crippling shyness all my life to the extent I even find it difficult to start a conversation with family and friends that I’ve know for donkey’s years

Having spent the vast majority of working life speaking to strangers for a living, I find that nowadays, I do tend to keep myself to myself. Having perfected my 'resting bitch face' over the years, I'm very good at avoiding contact with other human beings if and when I want to. I'll quite happily talk to dogs though

I frequently talk to strangers. Particularly at gigs, theatres etc; we already have something in common as we are there. You have to “ read the room” however and if the person you are talking to isnt interested then back off and give them space.

When I took my son to look round York University, he was cringing with embarrassment because friendly strangers kept talking to me, and I kept replying! I though it was a Yorkshire habit! My husband, who grew up in Slough, never got over someone he didn’t know talking to him in the pub!

I talk to everyone. It's nice to chat. A lady once told me that life isn't built of a few big experiences but a myriad of small experiences and that chatting for a few minutes to someone is probably one of the best as people are so interesting.

I speak to everyone my friend can't believe it. I walk my dogs and dog walkers are usualy chatty. I live in a small town (Ballymoney) and nearly everyone says hello. I am a libran so naturally chatty.xx

Boz

I took my 23 yr. old GD swimming at my Club last week. She worn an itsy-bitsy leopard print bikini.
People who usually ignore me became very friendly, especially those of the male gender.

I bet they did!

I was brought up to converse with people at bus stops, on trains etc. as long as I was with my mother, aunts, sister, etc.

When I left home at sixteen, I naturally became more cautious, as I had been warned that men could feel that a girl who was willing to talk was up for more.

But I still chatted to other women on buses, etc. and I assumed (rightly as it turned out) that in such respectable places as the Royal Theatre in Copenhagen, the National Museum and various concert halls I could safely even converse about the performance with unknown gentlemen, but I took the precaution of refusing any offers to have a drink afterwards.

It is sadly a sign of out time, that people engage with each other in cyber-space and on mobiles, and that strangers are "The Enemy" and dangerous.

They can be, as indeed they always could be, but if I had adhered to the present day tendency only to speak to people I know, I would be minus a competent gardener and minus two young people (in their 30s) no relations of mine, but willing to come for a couple of days now and then and do such useful things as putting up plaster-board in my kitchen, so I finally can start papering and painting it.

I do tend to chat to strangers.
This morning to a lady while we were waiting for item to be bought down from a stockroom
Recently to people on an aeroplane, while sitting on a bench waiting for DH, in the queue for a vaccination and a young lad who complimented me on my hair colour ( a subtle pink ).
Often turns out to be very interesting and there are ways of knowing and letting people know you are not up for chatting.

Another here who chats to all, I get into a bit of bother ( or did) going out in a group because even then I would wander off chatting to all and sundry. Poor Mr.d is long suffering.

I don't normally speak with strangers, but did have an interesting conversation on a long train journey recently. An ex-colleague rang my phone to tell me that another much-loved colleague had died.
The woman sitting opposite heard my words of sadness, and said she was sorry I'd received bad news.
We got chatting and eventually discovered that each of our daughters-in-law work in the same niche musical area, and of course know each other although living hundreds of miles apart.
An extraordinary coincidence.

It must be an (older person thing) at least over 45 ish…
Or under 5s

Inbetween those groups people become increasingly suspicious. * Some* children (not all) react in bewilderment if you speak to them …like you were from another planet 👽
…and it kind of reaches a peak of being embarrassed around age 12/15 ish if say, your Mum talks to teachers at a parents evening and “mum” is almost expected to walk 10 paces behind - just in case adolescent in question is spotted by one of their friends🤣

The under 5s I see on the other side of the counter are “full of it” and chat away unabashed even when they’re about to have meltdown after being refused a toy!
They’ll tell you everything.
And the babies riding in the trolleys give a sort of royal wave to their fans as they sail past the tills on the way out! …so joyous.

I'm a real chatterbox, and will speak to anybody! In my part of the Country (the North West) we are quite friendly, and most of us think nothing of chatting to people in queues or people sitting next to us or when we are out on dog walks. Even just passing someone on a quiet street we will smile and nod at each other. It's easy to tell if someone doesn't want to engage, no offence is taken and you just leave them to it.

DeeAitch56

I just wish I could strike up a conversation, I’ve suffered with crippling shyness all my life to the extent I even find it difficult to start a conversation with family and friends that I’ve know for donkey’s years

That must be horrible for you, and it's such a shame, too, because many people would be only to happy to chat.

Can you smile at strangers?

ginny yes I suppose one could “don” dark glasses, face mask and a full headset. They would get the message that you don’t want to talk😅

I like chatting to those I meet. Had a nice chat on bus recently to a lady from a nearby town.
When I was a young mum I hated being without adult company all day at home. I would go shopping just to speak to someone. Was shocking the number of sales assistants who make no eye contact, say nothing, just take your payment. So rude and unfriendly. Not a place to revisit.
I joined the WI two years ago. Enjoy the meetings and get to know everyone over time. Interesting visitors doing talks on a variety of subjects. Best one was granddaughter of a lady who started a ballroom dancing school during WW2. Became really famous and had her dancers on Come Dancing competing. Had photos from that tv show, Cilla's Surprise Surprise, Generation Game Show with Brucie I think. Plus lots of photos of people sleeping in underground stations using them as bomb shelters during the war. Other war damage pics too. Fascinating.
Had thought it would be boring! Was lovely seeing all the pics. Especially a young pretty Wogan, Cilla and Bruce Forsyth. Dance costumes were fabulous.
Worst talk subject, to my mind, was a talk on book binding in a London publishers. With extremely heavy books passed around!
Every WI group is different and we can visit their evenings too. One does Fashion Shows with the clothes seen available to buy with others on rails at vastly discounted prices.
Another fun evening was a group of musicians playing and singing songs at Christmas. Magical .

It might have been Michael Mosley in his Just One Thing series that expressed the importance of communicating with people for both parties

Yup! Just like my dear Mum I speak to “strangers” However, no one can beat one our dearest friends, he literally speaks to anyone and everyone wherever we go, we tease him relentlessly and when we go out with his wife as two couples we often “lose” him as he’s wandered off for a chat with someone

I think it depends where you live. In the last town we lived in nobody ever spoke to anybody they didn't know, if you tried to initiate any conversations you were glared at. We moved to a small town only 12 miles away and it's unusual not to get into a conversation with a stranger if you go to the local shop, into town or to the cinema. We couldn't believe what a difference those 12 miles make.

I had one of the most life-enhancing encounters on a late-night Tube train; travelling home with DH the train was quite full and there was a group of 3 or 4 twenty-something young men fooling about, smoking (eek - on the Tube!!) and drinking from cans of lager.

I caught the eye of one who rather threateningly said "I know what you're thinking, I'm a **". I said that actually I was thinking what I'd give for a swig of that beer, which totally took the wind out of his sails. He offered me the can and I did indeed take a lovely long swig. Bless him, he then asked if I'd like a drag of his wacky-baccy cigarette, but I declined! We got into a conversation about football (both Spurs supporters) then he turned to DH and asked "She your wife?" DH confirmed that indeed I was, and the young man told him he was a lucky old so-and-so and if he (the young man) was a bit older, he'd marry me! He then asked if he could kiss me; I thought I'd better agree, and he gave me the sweetest kiss on the forehead and told me that he wished all old women were like me (!). I told him that I wished all young men were like him, and that I hoped he'd have a long and happy life, just before the train reached his stop.

I've never forgotten that sweet kiss ...

gulligranny, there's lovely story !

gulligranny

I had one of the most life-enhancing encounters on a late-night Tube train; travelling home with DH the train was quite full and there was a group of 3 or 4 twenty-something young men fooling about, smoking (eek - on the Tube!!) and drinking from cans of lager.

I caught the eye of one who rather threateningly said "I know what you're thinking, I'm a **". I said that actually I was thinking what I'd give for a swig of that beer, which totally took the wind out of his sails. He offered me the can and I did indeed take a lovely long swig. Bless him, he then asked if I'd like a drag of his wacky-baccy cigarette, but I declined! We got into a conversation about football (both Spurs supporters) then he turned to DH and asked "She your wife?" DH confirmed that indeed I was, and the young man told him he was a lucky old so-and-so and if he (the young man) was a bit older, he'd marry me! He then asked if he could kiss me; I thought I'd better agree, and he gave me the sweetest kiss on the forehead and told me that he wished all old women were like me (!). I told him that I wished all young men were like him, and that I hoped he'd have a long and happy life, just before the train reached his stop.

I've never forgotten that sweet kiss ...

what a difference it can make when we really try to communicate with people with acceptance and love..

At one office I worked in I used to arrive very early and there were just a few people around. i used to walk past one man sat at his desk every day who never looked up or acknowledged me in any way. I started saying good morning every day and never had a response for around 6 mths. it got to be a bit of a personal battle for me. One day I'd had a really bad drive in, was a bit upset and walked past him without speaking he shouted good morning after me. For a split second I thought shall I ignore him for a change but turned round said good morning and said sorry i'd had a rotten drive and my mind was elsewhere. After that he started speaking to me every morning.

It’s the norm to strike up conversations here,you often get someone’s life story waiting in a queue.I,d hate to live somewhere that people didn’t speak to each other ,I,ve been known to ask directions and the person will say I,ll walk with you so you find it.Or when we,ve been in the car and stopped to ask they,ll offer to jump in a d take us there.Nothing better than friendly folk

paddyann54

It’s the norm to strike up conversations here,you often get someone’s life story waiting in a queue.I,d hate to live somewhere that people didn’t speak to each other ,I,ve been known to ask directions and the person will say I,ll walk with you so you find it.Or when we,ve been in the car and stopped to ask they,ll offer to jump in a d take us there.Nothing better than friendly folk

I can remember that same friendliness as a child, and also that my father would always stop his car in the street if we passed someone with shopping or elderly, and offer them a lift. He thought nothing of going out of his way.. we lived in a smallish village..

Still do, only right, no?