Gransnet forums

Chat

Politics and your adult children

(83 Posts)
LucyAnna2 Fri 11-Oct-24 18:19:16

Our older son has been here today and we have (good naturedly) discussed our (very different) political views. Younger son thinks more along the lines of our views, as does daughter, who is a very active party member.

How is the political climate in your house?

Lydie45 Tue 22-Oct-24 00:36:21

DillytheGardener

The Daily a mail is as far removed from Nigel Farage and GB news as you can get. Yes they support the Conservatives but not Nigel Farage or any extreme right wing political parties. It seems a fashion for people who never read it to condemn it. I read it and am certainly not right wing.

muckandnettles Tue 15-Oct-24 14:43:40

Our two adult dc are in the same political camp as us - ds especially is extremely well informed and listens to political podcasts, etc, so he's always up for a discussion which we love. Dd is less informed but very much on the same page because of her area of work. I don't know what I'd do if they had totally different views to us!

jocork Tue 15-Oct-24 14:36:23

My DS, DiL and DD all have similar political views to me.DD had a brief spell as a Tory supporter but thankfully grew out of that!

gulligranny Tue 15-Oct-24 14:04:57

You vote so as to oust out all who think as I do from positions of power? Well, I laughed out loud Caleo! So that would be people who take vast hand-outs for clothes, spectacles, boxes at football matches etc. I take it? If I've proved any point, it's that you have no idea what democracy is.

I'm intrigued to know how you can have such certain knowledge of my social circles. In fact I'm working class, born & brought up on a council estate in North London by parents who believed in hard work and standing on their own feet. It's how I try to live my life too, with as little as possible State interference. I'm sure that in your eyes the fact that I now (at the age of 79) live in a nice house in a nice area, enjoy a nice glass of wine and - heaven forbid - listen to classical music and read books has condemned me to a fate worse than death but, hey - I'll live with it.

So yes, you're quite right, you wouldn't fit in with my social circles, for which I am devoutly thankful.

Maggiemaybe Tue 15-Oct-24 14:03:29

Politically, we’re all generally of the same mindset, at various points left of centre. Of course we can and do disagree on how specific subjects should be dealt with, but we can usually discuss things without anyone getting annoyed. At least one of us voted in favour of Brexit and it’s caused no issues in the family - why would it? People are after all entitled to views that differ from our own.

We’re not agreed on religion, but again we’ve all been brought up to respect other people’s beliefs, and can discuss amicably. There are no evil cults in the mix.

Sex though? I can’t imagine that ever coming up as a subject at the family get-togethers. If it does I’ll be remembering an urgent phone call I’ve got to make. grin

Pantglas2 Tue 15-Oct-24 12:44:10

Caleo

Pantglas2:

"Gosh Caleo! Do you think similarly on religion?"
Yes I do. I respect people as people but I don't always respect people's beliefs. Some beliefs are downright evil ,and some beliefs are stupid, other beliefs are wise and good. I am selective .I do respect freedom of speech in matters of politics and the nature of God. Some religious sects are downright evil, others are stupid , and a few are mainly wise and good.

If nearest and dearest have unwise beliefs, or never think, you do them no favour by appearing to approve. Luckily for me, I have sons and a grandson who quiz me and object about some political or religious ideas I may suggest from time to time.

That’s pretty much how Kemi Badenoch responded to Laura Kuenssberg recently Caleo! Interesting 🤔

Caleo Tue 15-Oct-24 12:30:49

Pantglas2:

"Gosh Caleo! Do you think similarly on religion?"
Yes I do. I respect people as people but I don't always respect people's beliefs. Some beliefs are downright evil ,and some beliefs are stupid, other beliefs are wise and good. I am selective .I do respect freedom of speech in matters of politics and the nature of God. Some religious sects are downright evil, others are stupid , and a few are mainly wise and good.

If nearest and dearest have unwise beliefs, or never think, you do them no favour by appearing to approve. Luckily for me, I have sons and a grandson who quiz me and object about some political or religious ideas I may suggest from time to time.

Caleo Tue 15-Oct-24 12:15:27

You prove my point Gulligranny. I'd be unlikely ever to have moved in your social circles. Moreover I vote so as to oust all who think as you do from positions of power.

gulligranny Tue 15-Oct-24 11:09:28

Caleo, I cannot believe some of the things you have said!

"Wrong and dangerous to respect any old view because one loves the person"?????

"I think Tory & Brexit voters actually do move in different social circles from the rest of us"?????

Fortunately my friends/family and I are far more tolerant than you would appear to be. DH and I vote Tory and are proud Brexiteers, as are several of our friends; my BFF is a Remainer and votes for the SNP; other friends/family are Labour-voters and Remainers, but we all have one thing in common - we believe in democracy and the right of everyone to hold whatever views they wish, without it affecting how we feel about them.

NotSpaghetti Tue 15-Oct-24 10:05:54

My daughter in law told me that she voted Brexit because her father told her "you would be stupid not to". He is a rather pushy person who is always right. She said she went to vote with no certainly as to what was right because she didn't really engage with the arguments. It was her father's voice in the voting booth that swayed her in the end.

My son, her husband, was very vocally a remainer but says he hadn't really thought his wife was seriously considering it or he would have talked about it more at home.

Sometimes talking politics at home leads to greater understanding.
We don't all have to belittle - even if we are vocal and passionate.

We do not all agree about everything.
We get to know why people vote the way they do.

nanna8 Tue 15-Oct-24 00:27:39

That GB news is evil then is it? It is the only British news you can get really because the BBC has that ridiculous subscription and tells you you have to live in the UK. That puts you off for a start. I listen to that blonde woman sometimes, Isabel something. I actually like her though I can see she is a bit extreme . She has a ‘personality’ which is more than you can say for most.

SporeRB Tue 15-Oct-24 00:14:19

My husband is more to the right, myself and my daughter – centre, my daughter’s partner to the left and he also loves Keir Starmer.

My daughter voted for Labour this time but she did say if she had to vote based solely on the party leader, she will choose Rishi Sunak because he is a good egg.

Five years ago, my husband voted for UKIP during the election and he put a UKIP leaflet on the glass window. I called for a taxi and as soon as I step into the taxi, the Indian or Pakistani taxi driver had a go at me because I am Asian.

He said ‘I cannot believe what I am seeing. Don’t you realised that UKIP is against immigrants.'

My reply to him was “Not guilty your honour! Its my husband not me but as far as I am concerned, he is entitled to vote whichever party he wishes to.
However, if he starts showing interest in an extreme party like the British National Party, then I will have a quiet word with him.

He just murmured ‘You must love your husband very much if you let him vote for UKIP.’

SueEH Mon 14-Oct-24 19:56:08

My three AC are all, like me, Labour supporters. But will vote green if there is a sensible candidate. We don’t fall out.

Allira Mon 14-Oct-24 17:36:29

I wonder if some adult children tell their parents what they want them to hear, rather than where they actually put their cross in the ballot box?

It might mean a more peaceful visit.

Allira Mon 14-Oct-24 17:24:09

Caleo

Sazzl:

"My family and I all discussed who we were voting for before the election. We're a very mixed bunch, 3 Reform, 1 Labour, 1 Green, 1 Conservative. We don't argue about it and all respect each other's views. How it should be."

That is not how it should be, because it's right to respect persons but wrong and dangerous to respect any old view because one loves the person

It's better than saying I'd hate to have a son or daughter who voted for Brexit. Not that I did, but IF I did I'd wonder we had not brought her up right or that she had come under a bad influence.

That is a shocking thing to say.

I voted for Remain as did all our family who all have different political views but I know several people who voted to leave, all perfectly thoughtful, intelligent and decent people.

Pantglas2 Mon 14-Oct-24 16:54:10

Caleo

Sazzl:

"My family and I all discussed who we were voting for before the election. We're a very mixed bunch, 3 Reform, 1 Labour, 1 Green, 1 Conservative. We don't argue about it and all respect each other's views. How it should be."

That is not how it should be, because it's right to respect persons but wrong and dangerous to respect any old view because one loves the person

Gosh Caleo! Do you think similarly on religion?

My family (close and wider) all have hugely differing views politically and have never fallen out. We’re pretty broad minded and accepting of each others opinions - no echo chambers here!

Tenko Mon 14-Oct-24 15:25:05

newnanny

I don't think it's insulting because it is widely known that younger people vote more to the left but over time their votes tend to shift to the right. Hence not many pensioners vote Labour yet the same people say they did vote Labour more when they were younger.

Not necessarily, I used to be a conservative voter but have become more left wing as I’ve got older . When I was younger I followed my parents views but now I research and question more and working in the nhs has given me a different view point .
Where I live has been staunchly conservative for decades , however the Lib Dem’s gained power in the last election, so it’s not just me. And we do have a large older population.

IOMGran Mon 14-Oct-24 15:05:01

newnanny

I don't think it's insulting because it is widely known that younger people vote more to the left but over time their votes tend to shift to the right. Hence not many pensioners vote Labour yet the same people say they did vote Labour more when they were younger.

We have moved leftwards as we aged. We ran our own business and employed people so we have seen both sides.

Caleo Mon 14-Oct-24 15:03:17

My son and grandson hit the roof when I remarked I'd watched GBNews. I am so naive that I had not idea it was so evil.

IOMGran Mon 14-Oct-24 14:55:20

DillytheGardener

My husband is now far right now thanks to GB News, Farage and the Daily Mail. We were both small c conservative before then (I still am).

Younger son is a bit lazy and I don’t think votes unless whoever is his current girlfriend prods him into it, but think he votes labour.

The other is very left wing.

We used to argue a lot with the older son a lot about politics until he moved to NZ confused

How do you cope with your husband. I simply cannot cope with the GB News simple solution crew.

Caleo Mon 14-Oct-24 14:45:57

Sazzl:

"My family and I all discussed who we were voting for before the election. We're a very mixed bunch, 3 Reform, 1 Labour, 1 Green, 1 Conservative. We don't argue about it and all respect each other's views. How it should be."

That is not how it should be, because it's right to respect persons but wrong and dangerous to respect any old view because one loves the person

Caleo Mon 14-Oct-24 14:38:16

I think Tory and Brexit voters actually do move in different social circles from the rest of us.

Caleo Mon 14-Oct-24 14:36:09

PS I think David is right not to discuss sex, politics, and religion in the family circle but only if he knows that there would be quarrels and people would feel insulted and unhappy.

Our family and our deceased parents and deceased siblings all had the same political stance.

Caleo Mon 14-Oct-24 14:31:50

One son voted Lib Dem the other voted Labour. I voted Green partly only because this is a safe Lib Dem seat.
I'd hate to have a son or daughter who voted for Brexit. Not that I did, but IF I did I'd wonder we had not brought her up right or that she had come under a bad influence.

People's political affiliations do in fact reflect their characters.

newnanny Mon 14-Oct-24 14:23:53

My DH and I vote for same party and have largely similar views on politics. 1 DC and foster child also vote in same way as us. 1 DC votes for a different party and 1 DC has never voted. I don't care who people vote for I just wish everyone would vote especially now people can have a postal vote.