Farting

My dear old Mum used to say "Whose let Joey out of prison."

My husband swore blind he saw this on a gravestone in his teens
'Let the wind blow free for want of a fart killith me '. But my husband could make you believe black was white. I used to threaten to glue and air freshener to his bum he could clear a room . But then again so could my dad.

Mom and dad dance ballroom and sequence 4 times a week . If he farted he say to mom would move quicker. He was awful my dad . If he was constipated he used to say teeth marks on the loo seat.

An uncle of my used to say who's coughed in their rompers . Had an aunt who swore she never farted my dad would say well whose just let one off. She would say it was a draft from the water treatment plant. Nearest place was 20 miles away. My nan and mother in law always farted as they walked .

Living on my own I never try to control farts but forget when I am out just hope they don't smell. One of my uncles said the Queen doesn't fart or shit roses .

When looking for the guilty party my father used to say "He who smelt it dealt it".

Those who denied it supplied it
Those who smelt it dealt it

DeeDe

Reminded me of this you tube clip …😂
youtu.be/N5_x8rrT_BQ
Link might not work, but can see it by typing
Naga Munchetty brazenly farts on BBC Breakfast

I’m not surprised that Munchetty farts on tv. She is an apology of a woman who thinks she is God’s gift and WAY above us mere mortals!
I think she is vile!

A fart is a wonderful creature
It lives in the valley of bum
It travels around in your knickers
And comes out with a musical hum

😂

👀

It's handy to know that passing gas is a sign of a health digestive track. We have a woman here in Canada that is a home economist on the television, and has several cookbooks. She went 'viral' on instagram talking about her and her hubby's after dinner 'fart walks'. Moving after eating, especially a diet rich in fibre is good for you!

Saying that, I've told my grandkids that women don't fart, but they occasionally fluff.

Whiff

My husband swore blind he saw this on a gravestone in his teens
'Let the wind blow free for want of a fart killith me '. But my husband could make you believe black was white. I used to threaten to glue and air freshener to his bum he could clear a room . But then again so could my dad.

Mom and dad dance ballroom and sequence 4 times a week . If he farted he say to mom would move quicker. He was awful my dad . If he was constipated he used to say teeth marks on the loo seat.

An uncle of my used to say who's coughed in their rompers . Had an aunt who swore she never farted my dad would say well whose just let one off. She would say it was a draft from the water treatment plant. Nearest place was 20 miles away. My nan and mother in law always farted as they walked .

Living on my own I never try to control farts but forget when I am out just hope they don't smell. One of my uncles said the Queen doesn't fart or shit roses .

Is that why you chose your user name?

Or as Bart Simpson used to frequently quote
Beans beans
The musical fruit
The more you eat
The more you toot.

I followed DeeDe's link (09/11/2024 23:12) to Naga Munchetty. Sad to read so many racist and misogynistic comments.

Beans beans,
Good for the heart,
The more you eat,
The more you fart!

Your own composition Aveline? 😄 Do you have more?

Oreo

Your own composition Aveline? 😄 Do you have more?

The more you fart,
The better you feel,
So let’s have beans
At every meal!

is verse 2, I believe.

I cannot take the credit for that poem I'm afraid. It was commonly quoted in my distant youth.

😂
Is there a 3rd verse anyone?

You're obsessed with farts, woman!!

But it's my hobby MissAdventure and the only sport I'm any good at!

Where ‘ere you be let the wind go free
That was just for you MissAdventure 😄

Fair enough, as Miriam whatserface says, a fart brings people together.

Really? It usually clears the room

I never say fart.
I'm more of a blow off person, frankly.

Show off show off
Pick your nose and blow off!

It’s getting worse 🙀😲