Help me de-stress please

That's a kind post, NotSpaghetti, and there are other helpful suggestions here.
Sometimes a list of simple instructions might help your husband, gentleshores. I know I'm one who just goes off and does my own thing when helping out, not because I'm cussed, but because it's just how my more creative mind works. Following written lists helps me stay focused.
I hope you have a good break and can relax properly.

I learned a technnique which does help me a lot.

It is three phrases: Catch it, check it, change it.

Try to focus on your reaction to things. Become aware you are getting annoyed (caught) then ask yourself if it is serious (check) then think about how to react differently (change). If it isn't serious then shift your focus elsewhere- look out of the window, have a cuppa etc, even change the subject 'oh look what just flew past the window!'
If it serious then speak out but in a way that focusses on the issue. Challenge DH. 'Why do you think putting wet clothes with dry clothes gets things dry?' Put the onus on him to explain his behaviour in a logical way.
I do this with my son who has no idea how laundry works. Sometimes he just says, 'Give me time to come up with an answer!' because I think men sometimes just don't know or even think about why they do things.
Slowly my son's behaviour changes, and so does my reaction.
I find this brings issues out without emotional baggage
getting in the way.
I wish you luck and hope you both have an enjoyable break.

Do you have to go away so soon when you can hardly walk?
Let's hope you are going somewhere where you will be looked after.
DHs can drive one up the wall so you gave my sympathy.
My fav prayer is Lord grant ne patience but hurry...
Reading a relaxing novel helps. Just finished Wedding in Provence by Katie Fforde.
Or watching Wolf Hall. Now he had problems!

A few minute each day for the next few days , , hold you’re breath for 7 seconds then release slowly, do this daily and increase the breath holding up to 12 seconds this is good for calming the nerves it really works - good luck ❤️

It sounds to me that you are deeply frustrated because everything is so very difficult and thst some of the household tasks that are usually yours are being done inexpertly by an amateur!


You say He is mostly helpful and will fetch and carry things but doesn't listen properly - I think you will relax more when you accept that you will never change him - you won't change the irritating way he is trying to help. all you can do is change your own reaction to him! He will go on not listening - but you can let some things go. .

The truth is, in your words you are getting over a health setback - mercifully it is not forever. I have been in your shoes and I know what would normally be an irritating few moments can build up into something much bigger when you are relying on someone. It helped me to try to remember that the "not bothering me" with questions comes from a place of love.

I realise now that my husband was quite traumatised by my sudden illness and was carrying his fear, my slow recovery and his stress as well as the unfamiliar parts of everyday life.

Have you confessed to him your deep worries and your own fears? I didn't think I'd ever be "me" again - maybe you don't feel this but I found it easier once I had a weep about what I thought I'd lost.

Looking back over this post i don't think I'm being very helpful about relaxation but I do know that being truthful and allowing a few tears certainly clears the air.

Accept you can get well steadily gentleshores and little by little you will feel less resentment and more gratitude. 🙏
Does it matter if the packing has to wait a few days! After all he could have boiled your delicates or your best cardigan...

In times of stress I try to find some positives (even if tiny) and that definitely helps.
I pick a number - seven things to be happy about (say) or ten things or three before lunch.
I might be grateful for the sunshine filtering through the trees outside my window, the fact that my upstairs toilet is close to the bedroom, the nice clean bedding, a phone call, an unexpected cup of tea.
Soon it will be easier.

Thinking of you.