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Should I buy a birthday gift for my daughter's boyfriend

(47 Posts)
Pippins6133 Wed 29-Jan-25 17:12:36

My daughter's boyfriend will be 40 next month. They have been dating for about 9 months. I've only met him once. He seems nice. He appears to have 'everything'. Should I buy him a gift and, if so, does anyone have any ideas? Thank you.

Smileless2012 Wed 29-Jan-25 17:13:37

A bottle of whatever he likes to drink.

Imarocker Wed 29-Jan-25 17:57:17

Men are so difficult to buy for so I would second a bottle of whatever he likes to drink. Or a voucher for Amazon. I love those as I read on a Kindle.

Kim19 Wed 29-Jan-25 18:03:53

Only if you want to. After one meeting seems overly generous. 40? Champagne?

love0c Wed 29-Jan-25 18:05:00

Yes, definitely get him something. You could ask your daughter for advice on what to get.

kittylester Wed 29-Jan-25 18:07:37

Yes, I think you should. The men in my life wouldn't like champagne but definitely a bottle of something if he drinks.

crazyH Wed 29-Jan-25 18:19:00

Yes, you should. Your daughter will know what to get him. but I wouldn’t go overboard - something under £25.

Hithere Wed 29-Jan-25 18:21:14

Depends

How is your relationship with Jim?

How often do you talk? See each other? Communicate in general?

Most importantly- what does your daughter think?
Have you asked her?
This question is a little weird, given they have been dating for only 9 months

Hithere Wed 29-Jan-25 18:21:28

Him, not Jim

Oreo Wed 29-Jan-25 18:23:00

Ask your DD
I wouldn’t but may give a card.

keepingquiet Wed 29-Jan-25 18:26:46

Ask your daughter- if she says something expensive don't buy him anything!

Everdene Wed 29-Jan-25 18:31:40

If you are going to see him on his birthday and celebrate with them both then by all means buy something small and fairly impersonal. I don’t think I would give him anything otherwise, though, as you’ve only met him once in 9 months. As he’s 40 years old I doubt that he expects a present from his girlfriend’s mother. Maybe just send a card to acknowledge his special day?

Babs03 Wed 29-Jan-25 18:34:24

Yes do seeing as he is 40 but nothing expensive, ask your daughter who may even advise that it isn’t necessary seeing as you don’t know him that well.
I would run to a card and his favourite tipple as others have said.

Rainbow1235 Wed 29-Jan-25 18:49:55

I would buy a card and a bottle of wine in a nice gift bag after all 40 is a big birthday xx

Oopsadaisy1 Wed 29-Jan-25 19:53:14

Rainbow1235

I would buy a card and a bottle of wine in a nice gift bag after all 40 is a big birthday xx

This is what I would do as well.

Witzend Wed 29-Jan-25 20:01:43

I’ve given amazon vouchers in the past, unless I know something specific that they want.

Pippins6133 Wed 29-Jan-25 20:06:26

Thank you for your replies. I think I'll probably get a card and a bottle of something.
Hithere, hahaha, I thought you knew him/Jim, at first, (Jim/James).
I've only seen and spoken to him once. My daughter and he live quite a long way from me (they don't live together.)
Thanks again all.

Esmay Wed 29-Jan-25 20:22:12

It's always books for my son in law and on history as he's always asking my opinion and which history books I favour .
I have bought him Stilton, biscuits and port or chocolates before he became a bookaholic like me .

grumppa Wed 29-Jan-25 20:29:17

A card and a bottle. Choose something you like in case he offers to drink some with you!

GrannyIvy Wed 29-Jan-25 20:35:53

I would do a card and bottle of wine. However as they live a distance from you if you are not seeing him around the birthday maybe just send a card to him

Hithere Wed 29-Jan-25 20:47:16

Given the additional information, I would not buy him a present or card

Georgesgran Wed 29-Jan-25 21:00:10

What additional information?

That they don’t live nearby? It’s her DDs boyfriend and at 40 I think he would appreciate a card and a bottle, even if you have to hang onto the latter, until it can be handed over.

I’ve done similar for friends/colleagues of DD2, most of whom I haven’t met, but appreciate the help they offer her.

Harris27 Wed 29-Jan-25 21:21:28

My son had been going out with his girlfriend a year only met her once and I bought her some Morlton and brown for her 40 th it was well received.

teachkate Thu 30-Jan-25 12:03:00

I think I’d buy a voucher for a restaurant meal for both your daughter & new boyfriend - so they can celebrate his birthday together curtesy of you!

Seajaye Thu 30-Jan-25 12:04:38

If your daughter likes him and you like him then certainly a nice card, and if you are seeing him on or near his birthday, a modest gift such as a bottle of his favourite booze, would be a nice gesture to mark his fortieth, but check with your daughter first.