Gransnet forums

Chat

Do you feel cherished?

(42 Posts)
kittylester Sat 15-Mar-25 09:42:58

Since I met DH, I would say that I know he does cherish me but it isn't always obvious. And, I'm sure he would say the same. grin

Smileless2012 Sat 15-Mar-25 09:38:04

Yes, loved and cherished for more than 44 years.

Witzend Sat 15-Mar-25 09:37:15

Perhaps not on an everyday basis, but I certainly did when I was in hospital for 3 weeks and dh was visiting twice a day, with whatever I needed, inc. clean pyjamas when I was having drenching sweats every night.

Not to mention the occasion some years ago, when he came home with a lovely bouquet of flowers. Since it wasn’t my birthday or Valentine’s Day, I was bemused - until he explained that it was exactly 50 years ago, to the day, since we’d met.

Although I remembered the occasion very well, I couldn’t even have said what month it was!

ViceVersa Sat 15-Mar-25 09:36:49

No, don't think I ever have.

GrannySomerset Sat 15-Mar-25 09:35:53

Like so many of us who have lost our life’s partner I knew I was loved and cherished, part of the huge promises we made to one another and which we kept for almost sixty years. Without him my life is so diminished and a daily struggle to feel it is worthwhile.

Doodle Sat 15-Mar-25 09:31:00

I agree with Rosie. I always felt loved and cherished by Dh in a way that nothing else came close. I miss him more than words can say.

BigBertha1 Sat 15-Mar-25 09:30:47

Yes for all of our 47 (48) year marriage. I 'think I have always been as kind to him but I hope I'm making up for it.

RosieandherMaw Sat 15-Mar-25 09:26:41

to love and to cherish’ were our marriage vows to each other and yes I feel we have kept them. I feel very, very lucky in this though it has required a lot of ‘give and take’ over the years
Hear hear
I was cherished and miss this more than anything
My AC and GC love me, but Paw cherished me and I him "until death did us part"
Let's not dismiss "cherishing".

Cabbie21 Sat 15-Mar-25 09:21:39

‘ To have and to hold, to love and to cherish’. Not just for babies, but part of the marriage vows. If “cherished” means being valued for who I am and appreciated, then fundamentally yes, even if DH rarely put it into words and I didn’t always feel it.
There are several languages of love, not just words eg physical, gifts, actions. DH showed his by many actions, little tasks undertaken, using his expertise especially in IT and DIY, shouldering many expenses, even if he did fewer of the routine household tasks. Our marriage was not perfect, but we managed 40 years.

Washerwoman Sat 15-Mar-25 05:37:03

Yes I do.DH and I have had our ups and downs but he's the kindest most patient person I know really. And after 40 plus years it's the countless little things he's done that make me feel that.
And seeing DD struggle in a relationship where her partner was selfish and unsupportive it made me incredibly sad she was spending her life with someone who obviously didn't value her.
I'm proud to say after years of 'settling for 'because they had children she has split from him and decided she deserves more respect and happiness.

nanna8 Sat 15-Mar-25 05:19:16

Yes,definitely. I always have. We got married in 1967, I was a teenager. I have a lovely big family, some I am close to, others not so much but I have never actually fallen out with any of them. When we came here we knew absolutely no one, it was hard.

crazyH Fri 14-Mar-25 22:34:01

The only people who loved and cherished me were my parents. I think my husband (ex) married me for self-serving reasons….maybe that’s an unfair statement, but that’s how I sometimes feel.
Right now I don’t feel ‘cherished’ , but that’s ok My children love me, I hope.

lixy Fri 14-Mar-25 22:29:33

‘to love and to cherish’ were our marriage vows to each other and yes I feel we have kept them. I feel very, very lucky in this though it has required a lot of ‘give and take’ over the 41 years we have been married.

M0nica Fri 14-Mar-25 22:20:39

Surely 'loved and cherished' is the sort of phrase you use for a baby or child, not for a mature relationship, it has an air of proprietorship and protection.

DH and I are 2 independent adults. who have now been together 57 years and love each other and care about each other, but 'loved and cherished' is not a phrase I would use to describe ur relationship.

HeavenLeigh Fri 14-Mar-25 20:24:04

Yes, I feel loved and cherished. I’m like you surfingsal I wouldn’t stay in a relationship if no love. Life is too short.

Luminance Fri 14-Mar-25 20:21:53

I would have thought everyone has different criteria for what that really means as well as different emotional ability to measure it. People do not how things the same way and people do not receive things the same way. Keep a close watch over friends who do not feel loved for too many reasons why that might be.

surfingsal Fri 14-Mar-25 20:16:42

I was with group of friends today and one of them asked if any of us felt really loved and cherished by our husbands or partners , it was quite an eye opener we are a group of 15 and 7 said they didn't feel loved at all , which is very sad , I have always felt loved and cherished by my husband and would not stay in a relationship if there was no love , perhaps I am just very lucky?