Moving to the coast

HelterSkelter1

I have just read the link fancythat posted.
Such a very sad update by the OPs daughter. I am in tears for her.

Oh gosh.
I had forgotten about that update. My bad.
Am wondering if I ought to remove the link.
I will ask GNHQ to do so.

My inlaws moved to Torquay several years ago. They bought a lovely upside down house to take advantage of the sea views over Meadfoot beach.

They lived in a posh cul de sac where everybody kept themselves to themselves except on bin days when they put out boxes and boxes of empty alcohol bottles. They were all retired people who seemed to do nothing but drink and fall asleep for the rest of the day. 🤣

After a couple of years my FIL became ill and passed away. MIL could not drive so moved back to the Midlands.

My DH and I live by the sea. Not Devon but a seaside resort with a big famous tower. Both of us brought up here and have a flat facing the Irish Sea. I drive but there is a good tram service opposite us. We don't have many friends and I find many let us down. I have 2 daughters one lives not far who I could rely on if I was on my own and my other daughter would be there if needed but lives about an hour away. You would love it by the sea and there would probably be over 60's clubs etc. There are several ladies in my block who are retired and on their own but are happy enough and always in an out somewhere. I hope you come to a good decision. Good luck in your quest. xx

I have just read the link fancythat posted.
Such a very sad update by the OPs daughter. I am in tears for her.

My sister and brother in law were about your age when they moved to the coast ten years ago. They have never regretted it and enjoy every minute of it . However, they are very gregarious and still very fit and healthy so they are able to visit all their old friends and entertain them at their house. They did only move about fifty miles from their original home and they are the type who give parties and invite all their neighbours . They are very young at heart and not at all set in theirs ways.
I wouldn’t contemplate such a move as my family and friends are all local and that means more to me. Personally I don’t really see the attraction of the coast unless of course it is your home.

We retired to the North Yorkshire coast six years ago in our mid sixties, this put us further away from our family which was not an easy decision. I believe we all should live our lives as we feel best, I’m very close to my son and we use FaceTime twice a week and see each other a few times a year, I should add we have no grandchildren. It’s quite honestly the best thing we could have done, very healthy and totally beautiful scenery. I do think of the future but we none of us can secure that. Go for it!

fancythat

There has been a thread a bit like this on this site recently.
But I couldnt tell you what it was called.
It covered some of the things you are thinking about, I think.
If I find it, I will post it.

Not sure if this was the thread I was thinking of, or not.

www.gransnet.com/forums/house_and_home/a1331700-Still-Homesick-Two-Years-After-House-Move

I think sometimes, depending on the location, it's not always correct ylto say coastal towns are full of retirees and second homes. We do have our fair share, but where I live in Devon the schools are bursting at the seams and there are plenty of young workers - builders, decorators, gardeners etc. A lot changed during lockdown when many young families moved down to the county to work from home. For example, our DS1 came back with his family, he now works from home but also travels to Saudi and Australia for work.

I'm 68 and personally wouldn't uproot myself. Admittedly I am widowed though. I currently live on the outskirts of a major city with every possible amenity easily accessible including public transport. I drive at the moment but at my age that could change quite suddenly, and I no longer like driving in the dark. Having to drive through country lanes and therefore trying to get home before dark at 4pm in the winter, would be a nightmare. Bear in mind too that whereas once seaside towns were often full of retirees, they are now more likely to be full of empty second/holiday homes instead. It's also fair to say that it's not easy to break into a new social circle as you get older. There is also the inevitability of one of you being left alone. If you have lots of friends, good amenities and possibly family where you currently live, I would be inclined to stay where you are and, finances permitting, enjoy holidays at the coast.

You’re not so very old. Time for a little adventure?

It really depends on whether you could afford to reverse it if it proves to be a big mistake. If you could, what’s to lose.

I have a friend who has inherited his parents' retirement flat on the South Coast. He and his extended family use it as a holiday flat but he definitely wouldn't want to be there all the time.
It's great as a base for exploring the area but the town itself is God's waiting room most of the year.

I retired to the coast in Somerset and am so very glad I did.
Our town is like a playground for older people who enjoy hill walking, cycling, U3A, volunteering, sea swimming groups, sports clubs, local history, church, coffee mornings, craft workshops and plenty more, so lots of opportunity for making friends.

You sound to me as though a town would suit you better than a village or rural isolation. Plenty of shops and cafes, pubs and a cinema to enjoy. Choose a town where people actually live - not one that is a second home place where things can be very lonely.

Be aware that you might not have the resources you're used to, public transport is dire. Getting a doctor, vet all the essentials here was fine, probably better access than the city I lived in before. Dentists are a problem here, but I believe they a problem everywhere at the moment.

The thing you have to ask yourself is why you want to live there. If it's because you like it when the sun shines and you're on holiday, think what you will do all year round. Do you have a reason to be there? You need a reason otherwise you'll be adrift. You have to be the kind of person who enjoys the empty, quiet, winter months. I love the bustle when the tourists are here but even more so I adore the bleak, quiet, empty peace of what actually is the majority of the year. It's only really busy here for a few short months and the rest of the time it's bliss. I enjoy watching the tourists in the summer and every single time count my blessings that when they all go home I can stay as I actually live here and we have it to ourselves. Those huge empty hills and beaches in October or March are fabulous with a dog.

You have to throw yourself into things and make it work, otherwise you will always feel as though your 'real' life is where you lived before and where your family are.

The time almost certainly come when one of you will be left on your own, but you hopefully have many, many years of enjoying life on the coast. I love it and have no regrets.

There has been a thread a bit like this on this site recently.
But I couldnt tell you what it was called.
It covered some of the things you are thinking about, I think.
If I find it, I will post it.

I wouldn't leave my friends and family and all the services where to go anywhere, but especially the coast.

In summer its full, in winter empty and depressing.

Each to their own though- like others have said do plenty of research before making the move- also go for a week in the winter to see what it's really like.

I agree with GrannyIvy.

I yearn to live at the seaside - at least in the spring and summer!

Luckily where I live is 30mins by car to the coast.
Quite a lot of our walks with U3A are
coastal and looking carefully at these pretty villages you notice that most
are holiday homes so it would be very bleak and lonely in winter.

My personal preferences - I like:

Instow
Mortehoe
Westward Ho!
Bude

North Devon Hospital in Barnstaple is OK for most things, but special treatment is sent to Exeter.

Easy enough to make new friends and join things because many residents are retirees and blow-ins. Nice pubs and tea rooms around, garden centres, historic stuff to visit etc.

Good luck!

It is difficult to advise not knowing your situation fully. If you currently live a busy life with friends and family close I would stay where you are and enjoy lovely days out at the coast.

I think you need to do some research first. Look at houses near facilities. Would you be close to railway/bus links? Shops? Would it be possible to actually get a doctor as some practices are full? Go and visit at different times of the day and visit in winter too.
I moved home and area six years ago and I am quite happy where I live, but I researched it all first. I'm walking distance to an Aldi, close to bus stops, health centre etc.