Is intolerance getting worse on GN?

BlueBelle

I only report spam or some horrid posts by trolls usually very early mornings when I am awake at 4 am and they start nasty often sexual threads I would never ever report a bone fide poster because of differing views that’s totally out of order and I d have thought GN wouldn’t take notice of it
I don’t know what happened to FGT I wasn’t on the threads I just read the many posts about it Did the ban ever get reversed?
How on earth do you work out that it’s ’lefties posters’ ??? doing reporting Woodenspoon that seems awfully judgemental !

I have never seen a troll on here. What do I need to look out for?

Casdon

I think integration is very variable, the nearest small town to me is a UK army Gurkha base, and many of the soldiers opt to remain here after they complete active service, so we have all ages here. They are (both sexes) great contributors to the community, and their wives and children are often employed in local businesses, so they are very well integrated, whilst still maintaining their own traditions. It works really well for everybody I think.

And if everybody who came to the country was like them nobody would object. Unfortunately they are a rarity. Many do not integrate and have no intention of doing so. They expect us to integrate with them.

A lovely young Asian girl use to thread my eyebrows- very quiet, but once we got to know each other, she told me the guy outside was her uncle, and would sit for the few hours she worked, keeping an eye on her. She didn’t speak English too well, but told me enough, that sounded as though they kept her indoors most of the time. The husband she had married, had a kid with a western girlfriend who she called a W. She was very sad & would cry often. I felt so sorry for her.

Mt61

BlueBelle

I only report spam or some horrid posts by trolls usually very early mornings when I am awake at 4 am and they start nasty often sexual threads I would never ever report a bone fide poster because of differing views that’s totally out of order and I d have thought GN wouldn’t take notice of it
I don’t know what happened to FGT I wasn’t on the threads I just read the many posts about it Did the ban ever get reversed?
How on earth do you work out that it’s ’lefties posters’ ??? doing reporting Woodenspoon that seems awfully judgemental !

I have never seen a troll on here. What do I need to look out for?

Posts added to ancient threads, containing interminable links that probably take you to pages that are 'not suitable for work'.

Posts with embedded links to sales pages, often abroad.

Posts about difficult mothers-in-law from Americans with 'complex' lives and relationship patterns, often with veiled digs at posters on here.

Pretty much anything that links to Reddit.

Enoch Powell did indeed have far more too him than people realise, and statements that he had British Empire running through him are patently false; following Indian Independence in 1947 he felt that the rest of the Empire should follow, and was fiercely anti-Imperialist for the rest of his life.

Maremia

The parents who are immigrants, then the children, but does anyone have any stats or info on how the grandchildren integrate? Maybe it just takes time. Some of you may know.

I do know several GC of immigrants.

Only two (different families) have what we would call a western childhood the others are segregated outside of school, only playing with children of other family members.

Oh thanks. Will look out for those

My soon to be grand-daughter in law is a British born child of immigrants from the Middle East. Although her parents are Christian, they reflect the dominant culture of their country of origin. GDIL attended normal state school and integrated from primary. This totally clashed with her parents idea of how a young woman should behave, which meant that by 16 gDIL was sadly estranged from her family. GDIL is an extremely strong charactered intelligent young woman, and funded herself completely from aged 16. She is now a psychologist working with extremely traumatised children as well as continuing her education at university.

So to my mind integration appears very easy for children of immigrants, but not so easy for those whose formative years were embedded in a culture very different to British culture.

I agree Whitewavemark2

Mt61

A lovely young Asian girl use to thread my eyebrows- very quiet, but once we got to know each other, she told me the guy outside was her uncle, and would sit for the few hours she worked, keeping an eye on her. She didn’t speak English too well, but told me enough, that sounded as though they kept her indoors most of the time. The husband she had married, had a kid with a western girlfriend who she called a W. She was very sad & would cry often. I felt so sorry for her.

Many years ago I worked with a beautiful Asian girl. She wore Western clothes and was very trendy and great fun.

She never came out with the rest of us outside of work and it was quite a while before she admitted she was a prisoner in her own home. She had several brothers and they took turns dropping her off at work and picking her up. She was never allowed outside apart from work.

I know several people who are in 'mixed marriages'.
At least two are first-generation immigrants.

I could give you and all here personal examples of exactly the opposite.

1. The young muslim woman who works in our doctors reception for example, laughing, happy, extremely capable, picked up after work by a friendly husband.

The Muslim woman who works at the local Boots Hearing Centre testing frequencies on poorly ears: we were chatting during Covid. I've had to put my marriage off, she said, "we'll just have to wait longer" -"We decided this, we decided that"

The clear moral of this tale is that those posters who want to look for "poor oppressed Muslim women" will do so, and have done so, and ignore others

Those of us who know personally Muslim women we meet socially or medically or observe as we go about our daily lives have our stories to tell too.

To be fair, I live in a big multicultural city, and am a member of our local interfaith group which of course includes muslims who wish to heal our differences not drive us apart:

And I'm a member of a gym in a multicultural area with both men and women in of different backgrounds

....and I dont think people who live in smaller situations have the same opportunities

(I was addressing Primrose, Allira*.)

BTW, I must add, I do not doubt, Primrose, your story, and that there are many like that:

But I think perhaps we should consider presenting a balanced picture?

Thanks Wyllow3, I share your view that living in a place with a ‘more diverse’ populations leads to greater understanding and communication. I don’t doubt the example given by Promrose either but I could give so many others than paint a different picture

My soon to be granddaughter by marriage a prime example. Independent, successful career

My husband came to England from a commonwealth country in 1948. Very conventional childhood, went to grammar school, joined the police as first ethnic minority officer in his force, married me. All very ordinary and I can't see his colour or where he was born has ever been an issue to us although it has to some others.

I would like to add something as I feel the POV I was contesting has further considerations.

Amongst the White population, there are Women, girls, and yes also men, who are terrified of a parent or grandparent. We can also be made as terrified as the girl who the poster referred to above.

Terrified to go home, terrified to speak up about what is happening to them. There are wives whose husbands beat them up. there is coercive abuse - why, we read about it on the Estrangement threads here just sometimes, or in AIBU queries.

Men, Women and Children who have money withheld from them.

I cannot say how strongly enough I feel about this.

*Here "We" are, imo arrogantly criticising another culture...

.... when horrific things go on in ours*?

How can we? why do we not criticise across the board? Yes, of course there are some cultural elements where there are particular types of abuse, but then, so there are in White culture.

For example, weird "cults" where all sorts of organisations coerce particularly young vulnerable men and women.

Time to stop picking on one culture imo.

Time to put that behind us

Because cultures where for example gay people are killed for their sexuality or where women aren't permitted education etc are worse than ours.

Which cultures are they?

Women of all ethnic backgrounds may have some shady figure waiting in the background to escort them home.

Yes being a woman in Afghanistan or being a gay person in Iran is absolutely comparable to being a gay person or a woman in most European countries. It's not to do with colour. Abuse of women happens everywhere, if that abuse is enshrined in the law of a country it is a different matter.

Galaxy, did yiu miss out ‘absolutely incomparable’ ?

No I was being sarcastic in my irritation

Sorry Galaxy. In getting too serious in mine

Sarcasm doesn't travel well on the Internet so my fault.
There are values that are important to champion, we shouldn't be frightened of that.

Galaxy

Because cultures where for example gay people are killed for their sexuality or where women aren't permitted education etc are worse than ours.

But the more worrying implication from another post I just read is that because bad things happen here, we shouldn’t be critical or concerned about the ills in other countries.