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Thoughts on tipping in restaurants

(97 Posts)
Moii Mon 28-Jul-25 14:57:01

I was eating out on Saturday evening the bill of £56 included a 10% service charge, I'm not keen on this I think it should be optional but I always pay it if it's on there, we handed over £60 in cash and waited and waited for the £4 change and then asked for it as we were wanting to go.. The waiter looked very surprised we actually wanted our change, I didn't think I should have to explain myself but said you've already put 10% service charge on and took my change. I felt quite awkward and not sure I'll go back. The question is was that I being unreasonable wanting the change?

Happygirl79 Mon 28-Jul-25 14:58:58

No you were not.

silverlining48 Mon 28-Jul-25 15:03:43

No you were right, they had added 10% service already. I woukd have wanted my change.

ViceVersa Mon 28-Jul-25 15:03:51

No - and to be honest, I really don't understand the whole culture of tipping anyway. Why do we tip in some places and not others? It's an outdated custom and there's no need for it in this day and age. Just pay staff and workers a decent wage in the first place!

Ladyleftfieldlover Mon 28-Jul-25 15:06:27

If I was paying in cash and there was £4 change, I would have told them to keep the change. We always pay with a card and put 12 1/2% tip on - unless service charge is included.

Grannynannywanny Mon 28-Jul-25 15:13:08

I dislike the 10% service charge being added to a bill. I do wonder if it ever reaches the staff. I’d much rather decide to tip based on the service received.

buffyfly9 Mon 28-Jul-25 15:15:52

You were not being unreasonable! You had paid the 10% tip whether you wanted to or not, I think it's a damn cheek to be honest. It should be up the customer to decide if the food and service deserves a tip, if it does then I am very happy to pay 10%, if it isn't then I have on one occasion insisted it should be removed from my bill. Having paid the 10% I would have waited for my change.

Jackiest Mon 28-Jul-25 15:20:50

Staff should be paid a proper wage and not have to go grovelling from the customers to earn enough to live on. The price on the menu should be the price you pay.

BlueBelle Mon 28-Jul-25 15:53:56

I hate tipping I have prattled on about this so often on here…. it’s the awful unfairness of it to tip some people and not others
It’s an ancient tradition that should be left behind with other out of date practices like doffing your cap and women sitting quietly sewing in the corner
You feel you need to tip the taxi driver but not the train or bus driver You tip the waiter but not the cook who made the food, you tip the hairdresser but not the shop assistant !!
It’s all madness so I don’t tip

keepingquiet Mon 28-Jul-25 15:55:21

Tipping is second nature in the circles I move in- except if the service has been bad, which it rarely is.

I think it shows appreciation for the service.

Asking for the change seems very mean and petty to me.

Kate1949 Mon 28-Jul-25 16:02:03

We usually tip. We were in Venice recently and when my husband paid the bill the waiter said 'You must give me a tip'. A bit cheeky.

JaneJudge Mon 28-Jul-25 16:03:44

I don't like the service charges because I think the staff just wont see it. Leaving a proper cash tip was such a lovely thing to do
whoever decided this was normal have ruined it imo

Crocus5 Mon 28-Jul-25 16:04:47

I agree BlueBelle. You put I very well.

Crocus5 Mon 28-Jul-25 16:05:33

You put “it” very well.

Smileless2012 Mon 28-Jul-25 16:11:38

A service charge is a tip keepingquiet so Moii had already paid it.

silverlining48 Mon 28-Jul-25 16:18:54

27 years ago in NY we were chased down the road by a waiter where we had just eaten a fairly ordinary burger type meal. He was angry and shouting that the tip we had left wasn’t enough.

Tips were not so commonplace then, certainly not in Europe where none was expected. We were astonished and somewhat taken aback at his rudeness.

GrannyGravy13 Mon 28-Jul-25 16:22:09

I would have given the server the £60 and told them to keep the change.

crazyH Mon 28-Jul-25 16:28:24

Regardless of service charge, I always leave a tip. My 2 friends never do and I get so annoyed. What’s a couple of pounds, if the service was good?! And what’s a couple of pounds once a fortnight/ month! I find it mean to quibble over a tip.
Recently I went out for dinner with d.i.l’s parents. The waiter was a lovely young man, saving up to go to University. We gave him a generous tip.

Visgir1 Mon 28-Jul-25 16:36:16

We always tip. My neice was a waitress when she was a Student. The tips where she worked, were pooled and devided up so the Kitchen team didn't miss out.
If I pay by cash I wouldn't expect £4 change even if 10%was added to the bill, also we round it up if paying by card.

Nanato3 Mon 28-Jul-25 16:42:58

No you weren't being unreasonable wanting your change .
I would have asked for the 10% tip to be taken off the bill too . You expect to pay for the food and only tip if you feel you've had really good service. The staff get paid for doing a job and if they get paid the going rate shouldn't expect tips .

Norah Mon 28-Jul-25 16:52:44

I dislike food I've not cooked, but when we must eat away from home we tip generously above the service charge. Waiters earn little.

Magenta8 Mon 28-Jul-25 16:57:37

Tipping has always puzzled me. You tip a hairdresser or a barber but you wouldn't dream of tipping a doctor or a nurse. A box of Cadbury's Heroes to be shared is usually the extent of people's largesse towards hospital staff, often not even that.

There are many other illogical examples

silverlining48 Mon 28-Jul-25 17:04:12

I would never leave a tip on top of a service charge which can be as much as 15% . The service charge is the tip. It’s already generous . Hopefully divided so all the staff both front and kitchen benefit.
Though as has been said why tip some and not others ?
I never was tipped for doing my job. Rarely got a thankyou.

The employer is responsible for his staff and should pay a decent rate just as employers should in America and Customers should not be expected to subsidise their staff.

Elowen33 Mon 28-Jul-25 17:36:48

Most service charges are optional, it must state clearly if it is not, so you can ask for it to be removed.

I would never do that as it would be too embarrassing even though I do not agree with tipping. In the UK we have minimum wage and dont understand why we should tip waiters but not shop workers.

Ladyleftfieldlover Mon 28-Jul-25 17:56:07

If we are in a new to us restaurant we always ask how the tip is shared out before we put it on our credit card. Generally the money is shared between everyone - waiting staff and kitchen staff.