How to feel an idiot…

Bazza

I was nearly fifteen before my periods started, and although I knew everything I needed to know I can remember crying as I couldn’t be a child anymore. I was a very young fifteen year old! I’m very grateful for it now when I look at a lot of women girls of that age.

Same here - I loved dancing and gymnastics and in those days the pads were bulky (and no I wasn't underweight perhaps a bit small).
As for now I keep a pack of pads in the bathroom as have daughters, daughters in law and granddaughters who come to visit and stay overnight particularly at Christmas and Easter.

My daughter in law has “ borrowed” my tena pads a few times - she knows I always have them in

I started mine at 13 while I was in school. We’d had the talk and the film a few weeks before. I told my friends and a Gang of Five or six of us ran around the school excitedly looking for the dinner lady who after I’d explained that I’d just started, took us to the cupboard where the pads were kept.
I always said that when my DD started I’d take her to family planning and get her straight on the pill.
Well I needn’t have worried because she started at 11 and was into Bart Simpson and SpongeBob so I didn’t bother with the pill. 4 years later at age 15 she rang me at work and said I have something to tell you. Me thinking the worse surmised that she was pregnant since she had been going out with her bf for nearly a year but no she told me they were thinking of having sex. We then had the conversation about if it’s what she really wanted to do and making sure she felt ready in herself and wasn’t being coerced into anything I made the appointment at the clinic for the pill. The nurse asked the same questions as I did trying to make sure that she wasn’t being pressured into anything that she didn’t feel comfortable with or ready for.
After that first consultation they both went to the clinic every month on their own where my DD was given the pill and her bf was given condoms.
I’ll always be grateful that she was sensible enough to come to me about it and I’m thankful that we have that type of relationship that we can talk about things together.
She’s 23 now and into her second serious relationship. I hope if in the future she has a DD of her own that they have the type of relationship where they can be as open as we are with each other.
Didn’t mean to go off on a tangent there but it’s 3 am and I can’t sleep 💤

Madmeg

I was 10 when I started. I had no idea what was happening when I arrived at school one morning, saw blood in my knickers, and ran all the way home in tears. My mum calmly said "Oh, you've started, have you, hang on a minute" and she passed me a belt and pad! I had to ask what it was.

My younger DD started at age 9.5. I had already talked to my girls about periods, so she wasn't upset about it. She went to a small primary school with outside toilets and no sign of a sanitary towel machine, so always had to be prepared. I couple of years later I was on the PTA when we were discussing improvements to the school building, including new indoor toilets. I made the point that they should include sanitary product machines, but the chair (a woman) immediately laughed and said "Crikey Meg, this is a PRIMARY SCHOOL. I'm the mother of four girls and believe me they don't start their periods while at primary school".

Madmeg
I can remember 60 years ago a girl in my class at primary school, aged 9, must have started her periods. The word went round that she had started bleeding every month. I had no idea what that meant.
That Chairperson needed a biology lesson!

agnurse

While 11 is on the younger side, it's not super young. We have seen onset of menses in girls as young as 8, occasionally, but I think the standard definition of "normal" is 10-16.

One thing for her to be aware of: there is evidence to suggest that girls who start prior to age 12 may have a higher risk of breast cancer in the future. This is something she may want to discuss with her doctor when she gets older. (It seems to be the case that the longer your body is exposed to estrogen, the greater your risk of breast cancer. We know that early menarche (onset of menses), late menopause, having fewer pregnancies, and not breastfeeding can increase the risk of breast cancer.)

My mom was 10 and she told me her mom, said she had to stop climbing trees..she was a tomboy apparently...

I was late @16 yrs and very underdeveloped...was told i had menodysporia...know ive spelt this wrong...have had irregular heavy irregular periods all my life and it wasn't till i worked in Germany in the 80s they ran tests on my bloods/urine etc different times of a cycle and told me i was infertile..@ 35 yrs ..a shock..but amazingly fell pregnant @38
But then developed huge fibroids and heavy bleeding and had to have total hyster
ectomy with removal of both ovaries due to huge fibroids @ 45 ..am very grateful for German womens healthcare as they diagnosed me early and I had a much welcomed suprised baby when I returned to UK 1996, I requested hormone blood tests at my surgeryI was asked why did I want hormone tests...even after explaining,my history, the GP i saw was so not interested/untrained in women's health care, i was aghast!

OP YOU ARE NOT AN IDIOT

I was 10 when I started. I had no idea what was happening when I arrived at school one morning, saw blood in my knickers, and ran all the way home in tears. My mum calmly said "Oh, you've started, have you, hang on a minute" and she passed me a belt and pad! I had to ask what it was.

My younger DD started at age 9.5. I had already talked to my girls about periods, so she wasn't upset about it. She went to a small primary school with outside toilets and no sign of a sanitary towel machine, so always had to be prepared. I couple of years later I was on the PTA when we were discussing improvements to the school building, including new indoor toilets. I made the point that they should include sanitary product machines, but the chair (a woman) immediately laughed and said "Crikey Meg, this is a PRIMARY SCHOOL. I'm the mother of four girls and believe me they don't start their periods while at primary school".

I was nearly fifteen before my periods started, and although I knew everything I needed to know I can remember crying as I couldn’t be a child anymore. I was a very young fifteen year old! I’m very grateful for it now when I look at a lot of women girls of that age.

I was 11. My mother's comment was "you know you can get pregnant now, don't you. She wasn't saying that I should of course. Instead it was her attempt at the birds and bees talk!

DGD is coping with it all fine, and she normally carries her own supplies, she just got caught out a week early. (Periods can be erratic at first) Both myself and her mother started at about 11 too. It’s just that I think of her as ‘the baby’ still. I have no intention of worrying her with the future prospect of cancer! (I too was a nurse)
I have now purchased some regular sanitary pads, in case of future needs, but my word what a variety there is these days. I had a Hysterectomy at 35, so have had decades without exploring those shelves in the supermarket!

I'm sorry, GrannyIvy.
The whole system seems to be wrong, the child's needs should be paramount.

👍🏻

Allira her school counseller has said she won’t have a voice in Court until 13 years. Counseller has tried to talk to her father about this but he had no empathy with situation. My DD is terrified of going back to Court to try and change things as it was so traumatic last time. Fathers have lots of sympathy from Judges now even if they are not good fathers. It could be all so much easier for my poor DGD and my DD if he would work with them to the best interests of his child. Anyway this subject belongs to another thread so I’ll stop here.

Definitely don't tell her about the increased risk of cancer - how awful for a young girl who is battling with being a woman !
I started mine early,but my body was thin and underdeveloped like a child - I hated being the only girl in the class who couldn't go swimming .
I didn't really fill out for about five years.
My daughters had curves and breasts and started their periods late .
I'm really glad that neither of them had period pain as I did .
I'm hoping and praying that breast cancer treatments are going to be less invasive and more successful in the future .

I would have reached for some art paper if asked for a pad .

A bit too much for an 11year old Agnurse...... Think she has enough to contend with just now without scaring her!

GrannyIvy

My DGD2 started her periods aged 10 just two months before her 11th birthday. 6 months on she is coping but very embarrassed by it and won’t tell her friends. It just seems so young. As she lives 40% of the time with her father (due to a court order) she struggles when this happens in his time as she just wants her mum. Her father will not allow her to be with her mum or speak to her mum regarding this in his time. So very sad. He is isn’t an easy man to deal with and I fear for my DGD dealing with him and her body changes.

Poor little girl, I feel so sorry for girls who start their periods so young. She needs to be able to chat to her Mum or you about it.
I was only 11 and had no clue what was happening.

Do Courts listen to children when they decide these things?

I agree. I started my periods at 11 and have escaped breast cancer at age 66. And I think Im unlikely to succumb, either.

My DGD2 started her periods aged 10 just two months before her 11th birthday. 6 months on she is coping but very embarrassed by it and won’t tell her friends. It just seems so young. As she lives 40% of the time with her father (due to a court order) she struggles when this happens in his time as she just wants her mum. Her father will not allow her to be with her mum or speak to her mum regarding this in his time. So very sad. He is isn’t an easy man to deal with and I fear for my DGD dealing with him and her body changes.

So true Parsley and I can't imagine asking my Grandma if she had a pad to lend me or a towel as we called them.
Some things really have improved

I was 10, still in junior school when I started mine.......nobody believed me.

I am so glad that sanitary products are now available free of charge in women's toilets, not that I need them any more, of course.

agnurse

While 11 is on the younger side, it's not super young. We have seen onset of menses in girls as young as 8, occasionally, but I think the standard definition of "normal" is 10-16.

One thing for her to be aware of: there is evidence to suggest that girls who start prior to age 12 may have a higher risk of breast cancer in the future. This is something she may want to discuss with her doctor when she gets older. (It seems to be the case that the longer your body is exposed to estrogen, the greater your risk of breast cancer. We know that early menarche (onset of menses), late menopause, having fewer pregnancies, and not breastfeeding can increase the risk of breast cancer.)

I think this is one thing a young girl of 11 definitely does not want to be made aware of, if in fact it's even correct. Youngsters have enough to worry about without fretting about something which may or may not happen many years from today

That's quite funny! I would have offered a paper pad and asked if she needed a pen!

I wouldn't have any other kind of pad.
Thank goodness periods don't last forever.

My poor daughter (Downs) started her periods at 11 and was at Scout Camp luckily there were a couple of ladies present!

I started my periods at age eleven and finished in my late fifties which allegedly puts one at higher risk : touchwood have not had any cancer . There must be so many variables and age at onset is only one which I would not worry her with