The whole damn Christmas Thing!

M0nica

The period of the winter solstice has always been a time for celebration and excess, whether pagan or Christian, or secular as now. Traditions and behaviour have changed over time as everything does. A lot of rubbish is talked about Dickensian Christmases, but all he was doing was writing about what was already happening around him.

While Prince Albert populised the Christmas tree on his marriage to Queen Victoria. the tradition is believed to have started around 1800. The Yule log has always been associated with Christmas, so has holly, ivy singing carols, huge fires, gift giving

Onee of the thing I have learned from GN is that some families will have rows and hissy fits over almost anything. If Christmas wasn't around for them to fall out over, they would find something else.

I love Christmas, always have, always will, and I have yet to fall out with any of my family over it.

What a great post- going to say the same thing.

Except, Christmas is still for me a religious festival and all about family too if you celebrate together.

However, the older I get the less the 'magical' element, I clung to for most of my life, is just about gone due to family pressures, which are an inevitable part of life and are magnified by the intensity of Christmas Day for some people.

I think people should jiust try to relax about it all, not easy but somewhere there has to be not just peace on earth- but peace in us too...

Referring to the mention of Christmas windows, a relative lives in a small village where people decorate their windowx for Advent. Each window is revealed in turn on each day of December. How exciting. And they do look wonderful

My friend from near Nottingham does this advent window organised by their Church.
They draw numbers and this dictates when their window is revealed.
It is a huge thing for the village and a lovely walking route for children.

When I had four children living at home I got to the stage when I really hated the whole business, was exhausted for the event itself, resented all the expensive shopping and the never-ending wrapping. Now we live alone and just have two adult children and two offspring visiting it isn't so bad.
We're going away to our holiday home with them this year and everything will have to be simpler as we can't take everything with us.
We've never actually had a Christmas by ourselves, but for one wondrous year I had flu and stayed at home alone with ready meals whilst my husband went to stay with my son, his wife and their family.

I much prefer a “thank goodness Christmas is over” meal, in or out, not fussed. But then I’m not a very sociable person.

Dad used to say he wished Christmas was in the summer save struggling round in cold icy weather. Personally I think he has a point but me and OH are not daft. too many fall outs in family so we go to the chalet we always rent in Clarach Bay Borth on Christmas Eve. I am vegan but OH likes his crimbo dinner so its well equipped but before we leave I cook a turkey leg his favourite then cook the veg potatoes stuffing etc in the chalet on Christmas day, that is after on Christmas morning I go for a dip in the sea! we have a day just reading doing work on computer etc. there is a tv but we never watch tv dont own one.
highlight for us is Borth on Boxing Day when they have a dip in the sea raising money for charity RNLI its so funny to see them run to the sea some stay for a while some just run in and straight out again. after lots of them have bbqs on the beach a great day for all.
we usually come back just before New Years Eve which we do not celebrate

Stripegran Great idea! Between Halloween, Guy Fawkes (I've never understood why we celebrate attempted murder) and Christmas consumerism has taken over big time.

keepcalmandcavachon Agree very much.

Like you we just ignore the commercialism in shops and on TV. In fact, we ignore shops and live TV as much as possible. On TV we just record what we want to see - I can't remember when I last saw an advert.

We do what we like doing and that's it - some decorations, hymns, meeting up only with people we want to see, walks, food and a few presents. I spent 40+ years at work stressed out, I have no intention of getting stressed out trying to have some fun!

Can’t understand all the hype. It causes so much stress for those that don’t have a lot of money to spend.

GrannyGravy13

StripeyGran I was not having a go at you, what a strange comment 🤷‍♀️

Quite agree… think Christmas has ‘got’ her already. I’ve happily had the last couple of Christmas’s alone. Spent so much time getting parcels and cards, etc etc, off to family ( in Japan and elsewhere) that I was exhausted by Christmas and happy just to cook for one and watch and do what I wanted! I FaceTimed with family … just enough! Particularly as the time difference meant Christmas was not the same time here!
At 80 next year…I’ve had enough of cooking for Christmas and catering for various ‘diets’ . Happy to be on my own. Be happier with a cook and cleaner… but…!

I know I have asked before, ‘ How many of you are doing exactly what you want at Christmas?’.
So many have elderly relatives they have to host, or inlaws to whom they must take the grandchildren, when they would much rather stay ‘ home alone’.
I also feel social media is responsible for so many posts from people describing large, happy, family gatherings, when maybe a lot of those involved would much rather be at home in their pyjamas in front of the telly, knee deep in wrapping paper, eating an M&S Christmas dinner!

We have minimised Christmas as much as is feasible. No presents at all. One get together with the wider family and one with immediate family on the day. I only ever watch iPlayer so I dont see adverts and generally try to avoid all commercialisation. Shop by Click and Collect. I always find my greatest joy is going for a lovely walk with the family over Christmas. We have a favourite route we walk every year. Very luckily for me DH opts to cook and isnt interested in the walking.

There is a lot of that I have found on these forums. People having a go, being unkind, unnecessarily nasty.
I’m not saying you were having a go but some do I have experienced it myself so I try not to post anything theses days .yes I know I am posting now but just wanted to say sometimes people respond to posts without considering how their response comes across.
So go on everyone have a go at me now

I love Christmas; yes it does make me think of the lonely, and people who cannot afford the extravagance of Christmas, but I find it magical.
I have a son and daughter, but my choice entirely is to spend ot with my partner, just us too. My son lives 280 miles away and I will see him end of November to exchange gifts to him and his family. He has one 18 year old son, but his step children are not mine. I still buy for them now
My daughter I will see after Christmas.
I have a real tree, good food paid for by my Nector points I save for Christmas. I do not spend a fortune and go into debt, yet everyone us happy.
I love silly Christmas programmes that are so not true in real life, I like going to a farm to get my daughters Xmas tree, and I always buy a Christmas book in December on my kindle. I don't do commercial, don't get into a state, and only spend what I can afford.

Far too early to start thinking about christmas!

It all goes back to pre-Christian times. A party to frighten away any evil spirits that might be lurking in the winter dark!

The early Church knew what they were doing when they picked the winter solstice as the date to convince new Christian converts to celebrate Christmas. People had already been partying for hundreds of years!

I think it would suit better if Xmas was at end of February- Build up would start at beginning of December not September when it’s still summer time!
The worst two months of the year for me to get through are January and February so a later Xmas would make the long cold days of these months more enjoyable.
Last year half our family had Xmas dinner in our house and other half in DDs house . Then we all had a buffet tea together in our house. We played silly games and quizzes.
I find the week after Xmas to be like 6 Sundays in a row and depressing.

It’s only stressful if you make it so, I’m cooking for 12, possibly 14, having had five children I’m used to multi catering. It’s basically a roast dinner, prepare veg and puddings the day before and lay tables. The family all bring something nice to drink, and a jolly time is had by all. I definitely do not stress re presents they get what they are given , I blame advertising and the media for this constant ‘perfect Christmas myth’ that we are supposed to achieve.

Each to their own when it comes to Christmas I think. This is going to be my first Christmas without my DH who passed only a month ago. Usually we work around our various children’s commitments and they come and go as they please. No pressure and we normally have at least two of our adult children Christmas Day for lunch. I don’t make a fuss if they choose to go elsewhere as I get to see them regularly anyway. This year is going to be so very different. I would happily spend the day alone. Not to be morbid but just so I don’t have to put on a face to show I’m okay. I can shed a few tears without feeling guilty that my young grandchildren are supposed to be enjoying Christmas. Doesn’t really matter as my family are incredibly supportive and will be shedding a few tears themselves. But I know I will struggle. I’m just not sure yet about things like putting up the tree but realistically I know life has to continue so will probably do it for my grandkids. I do believe the true meaning of Christmas has generally been lost amongst the commercial aspects and far too much pressure to make it perfect! Just enjoy whatever pleases you. If that’s a big family thing all good to you, but if you want something different then ignore the hype and pressure from everything else. Do what makes you feel comfortable.

EkwaNimitee

Far too early to start thinking about christmas!

Not for families with limited incomes, they start early to spread their income out. Christmas starts for me in December. I just get all the preparatory work done and out the way so I enjoy December.
All people are different and what is too early for some, is right for others. I have 3 birthdays in December of immediate families, I love that too.

Sankev you sound a lovely caring mum and gran. I hope you have a gentle christmas and cope as best you can at a sad time for you all.

Eh? Very muddled post

HelterSkelter1

Referring to the mention of Christmas windows, a relative lives in a small village where people decorate their windowx for Advent. Each window is revealed in turn on each day of December. How exciting. And they do look wonderful

Is that Saltaire ?

raficha it was just a joke!
I actually made my plans back in march.

Many thanks HelterSkelter1. Your thoughts are much appreciated. I consider myself lucky as I do have people around who care and feel so sorry for those who are on their own without choice.