Gransnet forums

Chat

To bra or not to bra?

(94 Posts)
watermeadow Tue 25-Nov-25 13:45:38

I’ve never had a comfortable bra and have recently decided to rid myself of the beastly things.
Under two winter jumpers you wouldn’t know the difference but I still feel I should wear one when I go out. I’m 80 and quite fat. Is this unacceptable or are the rest of you doing the same?

Shelflife Tue 25-Nov-25 13:53:21

Of course it's not unacceptable. Having lunch in a pub just now . Wearing loose comfy top and no bra!

GrannyGravy13 Tue 25-Nov-25 14:12:22

I think it depends on one’s bust size.

No one wants to see large pendulum breasts swinging free.

BlueBelle Tue 25-Nov-25 14:28:20

Be careful my friend went braless and she now has two spaniel ears hanging down her front

Babs03 Tue 25-Nov-25 14:31:25

I wear a bra at home if visitors are coming otherwise I don’t. Also if going out for a walk wearing my wool winter coat that covers everything I go bra less. And am not flat chested but not very bosomy either, however, even a big bosom can be disguised by layers at this time of year.

Casdon Tue 25-Nov-25 14:35:19

I always wear a bra, I don’t notice I’ve got it on though, it just feels like part of my clothes. I’d rather wear a bra than socks, which I don’t find comfortable, I prefer bare feet.

Labradora Tue 25-Nov-25 14:38:03

Totally acceptable if you're comfortable with it.
Full disclosure however I am "bosomy" and they are kept under firm control at all times except when I'm in bed.
Sorry !!!
I absolutely sympathise with the difficulty of finding a comfortable bra.
The irony is that going into M&S there seem to me to be a million different styles to choose from but none that completely suits me.

GrannyGravy13 Tue 25-Nov-25 14:38:04

Casdon

I always wear a bra, I don’t notice I’ve got it on though, it just feels like part of my clothes. I’d rather wear a bra than socks, which I don’t find comfortable, I prefer bare feet.

That’s me, always a bra, it has to be freezing for me to wear socks!

There are so many different bras available, from pretty to practical, boned or boneless, front or back fastening (oh and they have to match my pants)

sassenach512 Tue 25-Nov-25 14:41:24

I agree with GrannyG you can get away with going bra-less if you're small breasted and winter jumpers hide a lot but not so much for the well upholstered lady, me being one. I'm quite happy to float around the house liberated of my bra in my kaftan but wouldn't go out without one.
Have you tried comfort bras water meadow? You pull them on like a top and they have no hooks or fastenings, they give a bit of support and feel quite comfortable

M0nica Tue 25-Nov-25 14:50:41

Casdon

I always wear a bra, I don’t notice I’ve got it on though, it just feels like part of my clothes. I’d rather wear a bra than socks, which I don’t find comfortable, I prefer bare feet.

I am the same. I am modestly endowed and wear straps and hooks at a comfortable feel, so it matters not whether I am wearing one or not.

I wear mules around the house, I slip them off automatically when I sit down, but on cold days like today I wear cosy, fluffy socks

Oreo Tue 25-Nov-25 15:14:29

watermeadow

I’ve never had a comfortable bra and have recently decided to rid myself of the beastly things.
Under two winter jumpers you wouldn’t know the difference but I still feel I should wear one when I go out. I’m 80 and quite fat. Is this unacceptable or are the rest of you doing the same?

It’s your choice so whatever you decide.
I feel better wearing a bra tbh but sometimes in the evening if just at home I change into a stretchy camisole covered by a big cardigan, leggings and fluffy socks.

AskAlice Tue 25-Nov-25 15:20:57

I'd say I'm average in the bosom department and I haven't worn a bra for a good few years now. I just found them so uncomfortable no matter what style or size/shape.

I do however wear a crop top style comfort bra. They pull on from the bottom up and have an extra layer of stretchy support inside. Either those or the lounging bras with padded cups give me enough support and are so much more comfortable and easier to put on.

AskAlice Tue 25-Nov-25 15:22:27

Just to add that when I buy new lounging bras with padded removable cups, I always put a few little stitches in to hold the cups in place otherwise they go walkabout and get creased and folded in the washing machine!

merlotgran Tue 25-Nov-25 15:28:08

I always wear a sports bra. No underwires, straps or hooks to get on my nerves and comfort guaranteed whatever I’m doing.
I only go braless if I’m having a day at home in my comfies.

Pittcity Tue 25-Nov-25 18:15:20

I discovered Conturve bras earlier this year and am finally comfortable.
They come off as soon as I get home though!

foxie48 Tue 25-Nov-25 18:43:02

I prefer to wear a bra but it has to be comfortable. When I had my pacemaker last year I found I had to change the make and style of bra as the ones I had rubbed. Fortunately we have a really good lingerie shop locally that does a good range of different makes and many of her customers are older women who are looking for comfort rather than anything else. I find the French brand, Chantelle, suit me now and they do a soft stretch that tbh I don't even know I'm wearing.

ViceVersa Tue 25-Nov-25 18:46:14

I am very much a 'well endowed' woman, but it's no bra for me wherever possible - and never when I'm at home. Medical issues make wearing anything tight very uncomfortable for me, so now I've thrown caution - and the bra - to the wind whenever I can get away without wearing one.
And yes, I've had proper bra fittings and even then, it's still uncomfortable for me to wear one for any length of time.

Wyllow3 Tue 25-Nov-25 19:05:24

sassenach512

I agree with GrannyG you can get away with going bra-less if you're small breasted and winter jumpers hide a lot but not so much for the well upholstered lady, me being one. I'm quite happy to float around the house liberated of my bra in my kaftan but wouldn't go out without one.
Have you tried comfort bras water meadow? You pull them on like a top and they have no hooks or fastenings, they give a bit of support and feel quite comfortable

I'm not well endowed but dont like flopping around. M n S do this one very comfy - never had such a comfy bra.
I also have some super ones from Amazon, similar to the M n S one but even better as regards support and a great look too.

Both have removable pads for those of us who need a little something and without pads for those who dont. I wear the M n S ones in bed, stops any squishings.

here it is.

www.marksandspencer.com/flexifit-crop-top-bralet/p/clp60438341?color=OPALINE&_gl=1*gfoqt1*_up*MQ..*_gs*MQ..&gclid=Cj0KCQiAxJXJBhD_ARIsAH_JGjh74w9FHUdZDe-suiuPEPxArJ1wZuQUi7xJhyccAP3CLF7QTE7Bj6YaAqKGEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds&gbraid=0AAAAAD7g6bTkuCJHhkc5b1UyS3R0moV_i#intid=pid_pg1pip48g4r4c3

Sago Tue 25-Nov-25 19:48:48

A well fitting bra will make any outfit look better.
IMHO Wacoal make the most comfortable bras.
I never go without a bra, I even sleep in one sometimes or I wear a cupped cami.

Iam64 Tue 25-Nov-25 19:49:28

I wore crop top/sports bras after breaking my shoulder 18 months ago. I couldn’t fasten a bra for several months. From a physio / recovery viewpoint, I was delighted to be able to fasten a bra. From a comfort view point, I much preferred the crop top.

In my youth I didn’t wear bras, firstly as a hippie type, then as a feminist. Starting serious work stopped this freedom, I needed to not have nipples on show through t shirts or sweaters.

I’ve never been well endowed. I’m back to crop tops, unless I’m going out posh ( maybe twice a year )

Tenko Tue 25-Nov-25 20:19:14

I’m a 34 E and always wear a bra , except in bed . I feel undressed without one . I wear minimiser bras from marks and find them really comfy . I have regular fittings as your body changes so much .

LadyGracie Tue 25-Nov-25 20:26:13

I don’t wear a bra, from the waist up it’s hard to differentiate which is my front and which is my back!

BlueBelle Tue 25-Nov-25 20:27:35

I have never ever found a comfortable bra but would feel worse with them flopping around it was fine when they were more able to hold themselves up but they need help now 🤣
I had a boyfriend once used to call them pinky and perky not quite so perky now

Redrobin51 Tue 25-Nov-25 21:11:53

I haven't been able to wear a bra for about 15 years now be cause of a health problem. It's very liberating and the only time I miss wearing one is when it is extremely hot and I want to wear a thin, pale top or with more formal fitted clothes where it gives you a better line. My bosoms are just average size and whether it is because I have never had children so they havemt stretched at all they haven't noticeably dropped. I think you should do whatever makes you feel the most comfortable.

sassenach512 Tue 25-Nov-25 21:47:25

Thanks Wyllow those m&s crop tops look really comfy I'm going to look them up on my next trip into town smile