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(81 Posts)
Aveline Thu 16-Jul-26 11:49:29

I know it's unreasonable but a new lady joined out little coffee group and I just don't like her. I tend to go with my gut on these things and it doesn't happen often. I don't know what to do. I actually avoided the group today as I just didn't want to have to talk when she's there. We often talk about family and problems but I don't want to share them with her.
What should I do? Just withdraw? I really like the others and would miss them. If I tell them I don't like her that's pretty mean. Any ideas?

Aveline Sat 18-Jul-26 16:51:46

Oh gosh yes. Living with a lot of nuns might be really testing. You'd have to get on with all of them and there'd be bound to be some who grated on you - plus you'd have to be very good and holy!

MissAdventure Sat 18-Jul-26 16:58:14

It's said that our tummy, belly, abdomen, (delete as applicable, or scream at your phone) is our second brain.
When you rationalise not liking someone using your sensible old brain, your stomach steps in and gives you "gut feelings" instead.

SpinDriftCoastal Sat 18-Jul-26 17:24:18

I went onto the committee of a well known UK women's federation (!). I came off pretty pronto. 'This is what we have been doing since 1971 and will continue to do it our way....' They were constantly asking for new members but it was impossible to join because they were cemented in stone. The 'leader' of the pack was really very rude and dismissive and I thought 'I am driving out on a dark winter's night for seven miles to go to a meeting for what? To be put down or dismissed!'

Plevey08 Sat 18-Jul-26 18:22:18

Ooh a silent order hollysteers....I bet there's some withering looks.

eazybee Sat 18-Jul-26 18:23:36

I would say if your daughter has a position of authority within the school this woman is after it, and if not, she sees her as a threat to her ambitions.
Sound advice to say little to this woman and tokeep her own counsel, but watch her back.