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Christmas

I love them honest I do but I’m glad they’ve gone.

(159 Posts)
morethan2 Fri 27-Dec-19 17:40:44

My son, their two children and two dogs have left after a lovely four days together and to be honest I’m glad to see the back of them. The dogs are the most stressful they get under my feet, follow me round all day. It’s probably because I smell of turkey and Christmas food. Boxing Day I had 14 to cater for.
After all the shopping, all the cooking not to mention the expense I wonder if it’s worth all the fuss. I can hardly believe I’m saying this, I can hardly believe I mean it. I wonder if I’ll regret thinking it in years to come when they don’t come. Is it just me or do any of you feel the same?

notanan2 Sat 28-Dec-19 10:31:51

purplepoppies you might not have done anything. The couple may have started an unresolved row just before you arrived, and they're just off! Not off with you

Juicylucy Sat 28-Dec-19 10:31:28

I would have loved to have hosted, especially this year as my daughter and family have returned from living in Australia for 8 years so it’s wonderful to have them home. However my house is not big enough to host both my daughters and families so we went to other daughters and all helped from cooking to tidying to clearing up after presents to putting kids to bed etc.
When I read of all grandparents who don’t see there grandchildren as my mum would say “ I count my blessings”.

CarlyD7 Sat 28-Dec-19 10:25:18

I wonder if part of the reason it all feels too "intense" is that families, generally, are much more scattered around the country (and sometimes around the world) than they used to be and so we don't have that day to day contact anymore, where a member of family can just drop in for an hour or so? Or, at Christmas, where they can just come to Mum & Dad for the day and then back to their own homes? Now it's "all or nothing", or "feast or famine" - so they're either with us in our homes 24/7 or we hardly see them at all. No wonder it all feels so stressful?

TerriBull Sat 28-Dec-19 10:22:25

I loved having them, children, partners, grandchildren, step daughter over the course of two days, but glad when we had the house back to ourselves and could begin to pack up the debris. GC had particularly large things that came in big boxes, I asked my gd if she wanted to take main present home "I'll leave it here" she replied. Thought to myself, "where can I tuck that away" shock Her mother rang last night with "could we possibly pick it up, she'd like it at home" Quckly ran round seeing if what else we could push their way. Little Brother took a handful of action men. Every little helps grin as Tesco were prone to tell us!

arosebyanyothername Sat 28-Dec-19 10:19:36

Sorry you were made to feel like that Purplepoppies

arosebyanyothername Sat 28-Dec-19 10:17:17

We had DD & partner, DS & DIL + 2 grandchildren. One brought starters and one brought an alternative to Christmas pudding. That helped a lot but I found the organising of beds for everyone and the prep for 2 different dinners (vegetarian and traditional) a bit stressful.
Most people helped a bit with getting drinks and clearing the table but DD’s partner spent the day with his headphones on listening to who knows what which I found very rude!
One thing I’ve learnt NOT to ask on Boxing Day is has everyone slept well as there’s always an argument about who gets the blow up bed??

Purplepoppies Sat 28-Dec-19 10:16:57

I'm staying with relatives, a long way from home. I was invited. Apparently only by one of the couple.... the other is being extremely off with me ?. I'm confident I haven't said or done anything offensive, I can only hazard that I'm unwanted ?. I'm here tonight for the last night then onto another relative tomorrow for the rest of my stay. I definitely won't be making this mistake again. I feel terrible. I have tried to be helpful, have cooked, contributed and been tidy. I don't know what else I can do tbh.
Hey ho. Nowt as queer as folk

GoldenAge Sat 28-Dec-19 10:11:00

morethan2 - four people and two dogs is a tall order to accommodate for four days when all the normal routine goes out of the window - but at least you were all together, you spent Christmas with your grandchildren, and they were able not to split from their family pets. Yes, it takes some effort and people are glad to get back to normality but please count your blessings. There are lots of people on this group who would give their right arm to be able to even see their grandchildren on Christmas Day let alone be in their company 24/7. I'm around my grandchildren thank goodness, if I were rationed or ignored like many gransnetters I would be devastated, so be glad that you're tired for a very good reason.

Frazzled Sat 28-Dec-19 10:10:15

Well Christmas is over once again & reading the posts above I can identify with a lot of the comments that you all made. A lot of money, time & effort. Including the new pillows !!!!! But this year after 4 difficult years which include being widowed, breast cancer, my eldest dd enduring a very bitter divorce our lives seem to be coming together again. Eldest daughter has new partner & baby so that meant 3 adult children, 2 partners & 5 grandchildren coming to me for the 2 days of Christmas. They all live locally so only joined me during the day apart from my son who stayed for moral support. When all was nearly over on Boxing Day evening we sat round the table playing a board game & shrieking with laughter. Time heals and we are all moving forward together. My husband would have been very proud of us I think. Thankyou for all your posts over the years as they have informed & amused in equal measure but until now I have only been a stalker !!!!
So here’s to the start of the new 20’s Happy New Year everyone xxxx

steves2907 Sat 28-Dec-19 10:09:33

It’s similar to when grandkids stay over. It’s great to see them and enjoy their company but when they leave it’s a big sigh of relief

GrandmaKT Sat 28-Dec-19 10:08:45

We had DS, Dil and two DGC for 5 nights. One night and one day we had the grandkids on our own as parents had a night away (which is actually easier than having them all!).
Christmas Day was the usual excitement of opening and playing with presents, preparing and cooking dinner (inc veggie options), clearing up afterwards, helping getting kids to bed (allocate 1 hour!) and more tidying. When I checked my fitbit that night, I'd done over 13,000 steps, and not set foot outside the house!!

Megs36 Sat 28-Dec-19 10:05:38

Had a little smile Morethan, boot on the other foot here, my lovely son and daughter in law have had us at their place nearly a week and waited hand and foot so I guess they’ll be glad to see the last of us!! New Years at other son and wife for more spoiling, so lucky I know.

Beanie654321 Sat 28-Dec-19 10:05:29

Morethan2 why dont you suggest that next year your son and his wife host or leave the dogs at home. Dont let it fester speak out. Xxx

Missiseff Sat 28-Dec-19 10:03:14

Think yourself very, very lucky. My husband and I had Christmas dinner alone for the second year running and it's horrendous. Not because I don't like him, and my dinner is always bloody amazing, but I'm estranged from my Son (not my choice) who will have spent his time with his gf's family, and my daughter and her partner wanted the day to themselves with their baby. I would have loved what you had. The pain of not having family round me is indescribable.

Jillybird Sat 28-Dec-19 09:57:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ReadyMeals Sat 28-Dec-19 09:57:38

Mine are limited to two nights by virtue of DGS having to split his xmas between his Dad and Mum. It actually works out just about right for me, I don't think I could stand houseguests for any longer at a stretch, as I am not particularly sociable by nature.

Harris27 Sat 28-Dec-19 09:56:01

Only had mine for a day and was exhausted!

timetogo2016 Sat 28-Dec-19 09:54:57

I agree with PamGeo.
You would miss them if they decide to stay home.

GrAnne2 Sat 28-Dec-19 09:54:16

It’s reassuring to know that most of us feel the same - I do think ageing, becoming more set in one’s habits & routines, plus lower energy levels all play their part. On reflection, as someone else has commented, I guess we should be grateful we’re still a) included in plans, and b) healthy enough to participate fully ...

Camelotclub Sat 28-Dec-19 09:52:08

Who was it that said "Guests are like fish. They go off after three days."

Abuelana Sat 28-Dec-19 09:51:53

Save the money and go on a cruise we’re thinking of doing that next year ?

Tedd1 Sat 28-Dec-19 09:51:51

Love all the posts. I also love catering for the family and really love having them around but getting very tired (husband snores and we don't have enough bedrooms to sleep in separate rooms)!
I would love either to go out for Christmas dinner or be invited somewhere but various complications within the families seem to stop this happening. Nearly 67 and feeling it!

Coconut Sat 28-Dec-19 09:50:06

We’ve had a houseful and it’s been absolutely wonderful, however ..... it is undoubtedly hard work, planning all with military precision !! Luckily everyone here, bar one ?,chips in and helps with everything. The chaos is short lived and I always think of friends I’ve lost and will never have fun with, or see their GC grow up, so I do count my blessings. But of course, the sense of “phew” when they’ve all gone is of course only natural as we do get tired as we age. Now I’m off to Italy to chill for a week and leaving them all to it ????‍♀️

dragonfly46 Sat 28-Dec-19 09:47:13

We used to come over from Hollandevery Christmas for 17 years and stay for 10 days with my parents in a 3 bedroom bungalow with DH and 2 DC. I shudder now at how much work it must have been for my mum. I thought she enjoyed it!

Cindysmith Sat 28-Dec-19 09:38:32

Oh I’m so glad it’s not just me!