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The Gransnet Virtual Christmas party 2020 with Ensure NutriVigor

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NatashaGransnet (GNHQ) Mon 14-Dec-20 10:25:42
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A festive hello to all gransnetters! tchsmile

As everyone else seems to already have their fairy lights twinkling and baubles out, we thought it’s time for us to do the same. So welcome everyone to our annual Gransnet Christmas Party. As health has been top of most of our agendas this year, we’re thrilled that Ensure NutriVigor is sponsoring this year’s festivities.

Not only that but they are giving one lucky gransnetter on this thread a £100 voucher to spend at a shop of their choice to start the new year in style (usual competition T&Cs apply). The winner will be picked at random from all who comment on this thread by 11am on 1st January 2021, so don’t forget to pop on and wish your fellow GNers a merry Christmas! flowers

It’s fair to say 2020 has been a bit of a shocker, and we know that because of health concerns, long distances, or many other reasons, plenty of you will be spending Christmas on your own. Which is where the Gransnet Virtual Christmas Party comes in. No need to battle the ghastly traffic, icy weather or smile through the sprouts. Simply don your sparkliest finery, pour a glass of your favourite tipple and come join us for some good company, virtual mince pies and questionable taste in Christmas decor - we do gaudy very well here at HQ. tchgrin

Everyone is welcome (as long as you bring something tasty to add to our virtual buffet) and even if you’ve got a busy day planned do pop in and wish your fellow gransnetters a Merry Christmas.

In the meantime shall we get into the spirit with some really cheesy Christmas jokes? Who’s first?

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compy99 Fri 18-Dec-20 12:03:54

Why does Santa have 3 gardens? ............because he likes to Hoe, Hoe, Hoe! groan

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Angelwings Fri 18-Dec-20 11:57:23

Seasons greetings to you all, stay safe and keep healthy.
Why couldn't Mary and Joseph join their work conference call?
Because there was no Zoom at the inn.

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falconer Fri 18-Dec-20 11:50:10

How do you cook sausages at Christmas? Cook pigs in electric blankets!

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BeHappy Fri 18-Dec-20 11:47:44

Merry Christmas everyone!

What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?
A Christmas quacker.

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hawkeye Fri 18-Dec-20 11:42:08

What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school?

"Bison"

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mo3733 Fri 18-Dec-20 11:37:32

who delivers presents to sharks at christmas ? santa jaws

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hugshelp Fri 18-Dec-20 11:35:09

Why does Santa have 3 gardens.
So he can hoe, hoe, hoe.

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sheilads105 Fri 18-Dec-20 11:22:26

I've just made a batch of mince pies with homemade mincemeat. Still warm from the oven...any takers???

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Patticake123 Fri 18-Dec-20 11:19:20

Happy Christmas everyone. ?

What did the biscuit say when it got run over?

Oh crumbs!

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Moggycuddler Fri 18-Dec-20 11:06:19

Situpstraight2

A rude one, so don’t read if easily offended and it’s only vaguely Christmassy.

Guy walks into a bar on Christmas Eve, with 2 gifts, gets talking to the barman and tells him that he’s dating a twin and there is a gift for each of them.

Wow, says the barman how do you tell them apart.

Well, says the guy, Lucy wears blue nail varnish.

And Bob has a D**k.

Very funny. Should have seen that one coming! But shouldn't it be that the guy said he was dating 2 twins? A happy safe and praceful Christmas to every Gransnetter (specially those who will be spending it alone) and all good wishes for the new year. Hopefully it will be a much better one for us all.

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Kimi64 Fri 18-Dec-20 11:05:03
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Thought this was unusual although I would need a lot of patience !
Merry Christmas to you all

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JdotJ Fri 18-Dec-20 11:04:46
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This....

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luckypete Fri 18-Dec-20 11:01:24

What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby? Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

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MollyG Fri 18-Dec-20 10:54:52

Merry Christmas to you all Xx

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crazygranny Fri 18-Dec-20 10:53:21

I would like to contribute Christmas Crackle Cookies which my grandson and I made on Wednesday. They are crispy on the outside and filled with gooey chocolate goodness in the middle!

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CrumblyMumbly Fri 18-Dec-20 10:47:06
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My cat, Milford, has the right idea! I wish a lovely, relaxing and safe Christmas to all Gransnetters - thanks for keeping me almost sane as I try to look after kids and my Mum. tchsmile

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LynneH Fri 18-Dec-20 10:42:22

Or the dyslexic who didn’t believe in Dog?

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LauraNorder Fri 18-Dec-20 10:40:13

The children will have a great deal on Christmas morning.
I hope we do too.
Not sure if that counts as a joke.

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jenni123 Fri 18-Dec-20 10:34:35

joannapiano your msg made me laugh.

Happy Christmas to all who celebrate. Happy Holiday to others who don't.

Lets hope 2021 will be much better than 2020.

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Grandchildren2 Fri 18-Dec-20 10:30:56

Hi I am new to gransnet and not a great user communicating this way so please be kind. I am wondering how you get involved with the virtual Christmas party thing?

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scrapgran Fri 18-Dec-20 10:30:54

Why did Santa Claus get a parking ticket on Christmas Eve? He left his sleigh in a snow parking zone.

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patnic Fri 18-Dec-20 10:23:13

Loving some of the jokes on here. Cheered me up no end. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

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Hellsbelles Fri 18-Dec-20 10:17:55

Who brings presents to animals ? Santa Paws .???⛄⛄⛄❄❄❄

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Lexisgranny Fri 18-Dec-20 06:30:57

For years I carried on my mother’s tradition of serving a grapefruit/gin sorbet between the main course and Christmas pudding. It cleansed the palate wonderfully, and prepared it for the richness of the pudding and sauce both heavily laced with brandy! Sadly, in latter years, statins prevent this.

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Juno56 Fri 18-Dec-20 06:03:03

Thank you for the invitation. I'll be the one checking out the 'refreshment' table and singing Santa Baby ??

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